My Stepson will be 6 when his dad and I get married. I have been in his life for as long as he remembers (3.5) and he doesn't seem to really have any memories that don't include me. He is pretty excited about the wedding and being involved as the ring bearer. We have kept him in the loop as much as a 5/6 year old is interested. On rare occasions, he attends our church which is the one that we will be married in.
His mom on the other hand, I have no relationship at all with her. My FI tries to co-parent but she is very narcissistic and refuses to do anything that is not in her interests.
I would LOVE to send my stepson an invite because I think he'd love to get something in the mail and have something for the wedding. I however don't want to overstep any gray areas and have his mother become belligerent because of it (she is not invited). She knows we are getting married and probably knows the date by now. I could see her preventing our stepson from attending his father's wedding because something isn't on her terms.
I could also see her showing up to the ceremony uninvited if I include ALL the information on my Stepson's invite. She is not from the area but she has been to our area enough to figure out how to navigate it. I can cut the bottom off the invite that has the church info on it without compromising the invite and I just won't include the reception card in his envelope.
Do you think this would be ok or do you think I should just not bother sending my stepson an invite? OR do you think I should throw caution in the wind and just send the invite untouched? I plan on getting my FI's opinion on the whole thing before making any other decisions. Invites don't go out towards the end of the month.
11/21/2012 - Chapter 1: The Text
10/23/2014 - Chapter 2: The Proposal
11/21/2015 - Chapter 3: The Wedding