children

bakers5 · September 2015

would it be rude to allow/invite immediate family children only? i'm trying with the count without children of friends and cousins, just having children of siblings.

lyndausvi · September 2015

The only invited minors I invited was my nieces and nephews. Had I had minor first cousins, siblings or kids of my own I would have invited them too.

It's pretty common in my social circle (and DH's) for those above to be invited. I personally didn't get any fallback from my choice. Even if I did, I would not have caved.

snowywinter · September 2015

Nope, not rude at all. Just make it clear to everyone, especially your out-of-town guests, that it's adults only with the exception of immediate family.

Jen4948 · September 2015

It's reasonable to invite children in circles, such as immediate family.

Liatris2010 · September 2015

Totally reasonable.

julieanne912 · September 2015

Yup that's totally fine. We limited it to family and those friends of ours who are local whose children we actually know.

huskypuppy14 · September 2015

You can invite any or all children that you want. The only etiquette rule is if you invite 8 year old Sally you also have to invite her 5 year old brother too. You are well within your rights to pick an choose which families get invited.

SP29 · September 2015

Nope, not rude.

Besides not splitting up families (i.e. inviting 8 year old Sally and her 5 year old brother too), children are their own guest. You can invite some children, but not others.

It is generally recommended to invite in circles (although that is a consideration, not an etiquette rule) to smooth over feelings- so inviting children of immediate family only is a good one.

madamerwin · October 2015

snowywinter said: Nope, not rude at all. Just make it clear to everyone, especially your out-of-town guests, that it's adults only with the exception of immediate family.

----BOX----

Please don't explicitly tell your guests (or put in the invitation) that it's "adults only" or "no kids allowed" - it's not proper etiquette to tell people who is NOT invited. I agree with other PPs that it's absolutely fine to invite some children and not others (as long as you're not inviting one minor sibling but not the other), but you should do so without explicitly calling attention to it.

Instead of explicitly telling people that their kids are not welcome, address your invitations to the people invited. If you are only inviting the adult couple and not their kids, address the invitation to John and Jane Smith (or Mr. and Mrs. Smith, or something like that). If you are inviting the adults plus their children, address the invitation to The Smith Family (or John, Jane, and Sally Smith, or Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Family, or whatever). If anyone adds their uninvited kids to the RSVPs, you simply call or email to inform them that the invitation was just for Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and unfortunately you will not be able to accommodate Sally.

I think people overthink this issue in general, though; we invited some children to our wedding (the ones to whom we are related, as well as kids with whom we have a relationship), and we didn't have anyone whose kids weren't invited include them in their RSVP. And no one whose kids weren't invited were offended that there were other kids there. Adults generally understand that at weddings, kids may be invited in circles, and not everyone is going to invite every single child of every single guest.

MesmrEwe · October 2015

As long as you don't blur the lines, you're fine!

I'd also let it be known only verbally that is the case because not everyone has read Emily Post and knows when the invitation says "Mr. & Mrs ____" that it doesn't actually mean "Mr. & Mrs. _____ and family!" It also works the other way, we got an invitation that the bride had called us that the kids are invited hoping DD would sit with her kids, we got the invite with only DH's name and mine (the whole event is one that y'all would just go crazy over the etiquette blunders!).

children

Re: children

Choose Another Board

Search Boards