If all pics are done, what's the point of a cocktail hour?

knottie2b256f5c2ae42586 · October 2015

I just have a quick question and I hope I don't come off as being inconsiderate or stupid or something.

I just got done reading a post regarding the topic of FLs saving time or not and read that doing a FL allows the B&G to attend cocktail hour because the majority of photos (if not all) are taken already.

What is the point of having a cocktail hour if ALL photos are taken care of already? Why not go directly into dinner?

Also, if the B&G are attending cocktail hour or a portion of it then the grand entrance seems silly since everyone has seen the couple already after the ceremony.

I haven't attended many weddings so I feel like I'm just missing something here. The post I read just got me curious!

Thanks!

madamerwin · October 2015

If you do most of your photos before the ceremony, there really isn't a purpose for cocktail hour. We did a first look and got about 80% of photos done before the ceremony. We still had a cocktail hour so that we had the option to do more photos after the ceremony, but we ended up only needing about 15 minutes to do photos after. So, we had the DJ introduce us during the middle of cocktail hour, and we got to mingle with our guests and thank everyone for attending during that time.

ETA: We were glad we had cocktail hour scheduled in - there were passed apps and good cocktails, and it was a great chance to talk to all of our guests before sitting down for dinner!

cupcait927 · October 2015

Jax43615 said:

I just have a quick question and I hope I don't come off as being inconsiderate or stupid or something.
I just got done reading a post regarding the topic of FLs saving time or not and read that doing a FL allows the B&G to attend cocktail hour because the majority of photos (if not all) are taken already.
What is the point of having a cocktail hour if ALL photos are taken care of already? Why not go directly into dinner?
Also, if the B&G are attending cocktail hour or a portion of it then the grand entrance seems silly since everyone has seen the couple already after the ceremony.
I haven't attended many weddings so I feel like I'm just missing something here. The post I read just got me curious!
Thanks!

We did a first look so that we could enjoy our cocktail hour. I wanted to be able to spend as much time with my guests as possible, and also be able to enjoy the delicious food we had picked out for that time as well. Our wedding didn't start until 6:30 so it wasn't as if we kept people there an overly long time just so we could enjoy that hour (reception ended by 10:45-ish). As it turns out - our photographer ended up wanting to get some more pics after our ceremony so we didn't get in to cocktail hour until 15 minutes before it ended. We also didn't plan on a grand entrance so guests seeing us beforehand wasn't an issue - we only had 50 guests, all close family and friends, and no bridal party so a grand entrance would've seemed silly regardless.

leroweb · October 2015

We are doing pictures before and after the whole thing. The ceremony and reception are at the same location.
Our venue includes cocktail hour so we are doing one. The plan is of right now is to leave. Spend a few minutes together and go mingle.
Our day of coordinator will then pull us out and we will be introduced and have a our first dance then do dinner

For me the cocktail hour is a down time where people can mingle before they have to eat and the music gets loud. Also going straight to dinner for us would put dinner to early.

charlotte989875 · October 2015

We did a FL and had a cocktail hour (which we went to the majority of). We did an entrance, walked in cut the cake and did our first dance. We wanted a cocktail hour because we got married on a Friday, ceremony at 5 cocktail hour at 6 dinner around 7:30 (after spotlight dances) so we wanted to give people more of a buffer if they couldn't make the ceremony (or chose not to) but could make the dinner. Plus it gave us time so say thank you to everyone who came (we did a receiving line after the ceremony, too) without doing table visits.

I agree you don't really need a cocktail hour, but I like them, gives people time to mingle get a drink and see who is there before sitting right down to dinner.

peachy13 · October 2015

We are doing pictures before our ceremony and still having a cocktail hour after ceremony/before reception. I actually really like the cocktail hour when I'm a guest at weddings. It's fun to mingle and drink/eat with everyone before the reception starts.

I think I might need that hour as a bride. We'll (me, husband, wedding party) be in a separate room with drinks/food during the hour. It will be kind of nice to unwind and celebrate post-ceremony before introductions, toasts, greeting guests, etc. Also, I need time to bustle my dress and my hair style is also changing for the reception.

ETA: a lot of words

simcal18 · October 2015

The point of a cocktail hour is that cocktail hours are awesome. They are my favorite part of most weddings. I love me some good apps and good booze. Plus it's nice to mingle with people (and perhaps make a quick restroom run for a touch-up) before the more formal festivities get started.

We did a first look but still had quite a few family pictures to do after the ceremony. Then we had to bustle my dress, which took about 15 minutes because it had 3 layers and each one of them had to be bustled individually. By the time we were done and ready to go cocktail hour was up. :-( Thank goodness our awesome caterers brought us out some apps and refreshments while we were finishing up pictures. A couple of people saw DH and I during cocktail hour but it still wasn't weird to be introduced into the reception--we just hung back with the bridal party while everyone else went into dinner and it was kind of a let's-formally-start-the-festivities thing.

labro · October 2015

I really like the perspective that the cocktail hour is a nice time to socialize and talk to your guests if you aren't going to be busy taking photos. We were rushed during dinner to greet and talk to everyone, and once dinner was over and the dancing started, it was pretty much impossible. I wouldn't skip it if I had the opportunity.

WinstonsGirl · October 2015

We did the family photos then, and combined WP since we didn't do a FL. We also had a couple of minutes to mingle before dinner, but mainly, my bustle took my Mom and Aunt about 20 min to figure out and get done properly. I like that there was a buffer of time before dinner in case little things like that came up.

STARMOON44 · October 2015

The purpose of a cocktail hour at a wedding is the same as at any other dinner event- to serve your guests pre-dinner drinks and nibbles, give them an opportunity for mingling, and account for any variation in arrival times. I have "cocktail hour" even for dinner parties in my home, although it's often less than an hour.

lyndausvi · October 2015

Think about most social events you attend. For most people they walk-in and start saying hello to people, hugs, kisses, "oh I haven't seen you in so long".... blah, blah, blah. It's just a natural process of walking into a party.

Cocktail hours take care of not only what to do during photos, but it's gets all the greetings out of the way before everyone sits down for dinner. Then after dinner the mingling starts again.

If your ceremony and reception are in different locations, it takes into consideration of late arrivals. Those who are always late, others who just got caught up in talking at the end of the ceremony, traffic, finding a parking spot, etc.

Guarantee you if you started out with dinner at 5pm without a cocktail hour, it would be almost 5:30pm to get everyone seated.

safire3 · October 2015

At my wedding we needed the cocktail hours for pics (didn't do a first look) as well as to get some refreshments and bustle my dress. We did the grand entrance then during dinner everyone kept coming up to us to say hello and congratulate us (we also had buffet style so lots of people were on their way to or from and just decided to stop by I guess). Becuase of this I didn't eat much and even got some food on my dress trying to stand to hug someone. I think the cocktail hour is the perfect place to mingle with your guests if you can spare the time. Every one will want to congratulate you, take pictures with you etc and it's hard to find time for everyone throughout the rest of the night. Also they will let you eat your dinner in peace lol.

Maggie0829 · October 2015

lyndausvi said:

Think about most social events you attend. For most people they walk-in and start saying hello to people, hugs, kisses, "oh I haven't seen you in so long".... blah, blah, blah. It's just a natural process of walking into a party.

Cocktail hours take care of not only what to do during photos, but it's gets all the greetings out of the way before everyone sits down for dinner. Then after dinner the mingling starts again.

If your ceremony and reception are in different locations, it takes into consideration of late arrivals. Those who are always late, others who just got caught up in talking at the end of the ceremony, traffic, finding a parking spot, etc.

Guarantee you if you started out with dinner at 5pm without a cocktail hour, it would be almost 5:30pm to get everyone seated.

This.

Say you were having a dinner party. You would most likely have some apps and drinks and light mingling instead of just sitting straight down to dinner. Same with a wedding. It gives a chance for people to get to your location (won't feel super rushed if they are at different locations), find their seats, sign the guest book, drop off their gifts, and to mingle before the main event. Basically it is a great way to start off any type of party.

And really, who doesn't mind having a chance to eat more food?

luckya23 · October 2015

WinstonsGirl said:

We did the family photos then, and combined WP since we didn't do a FL. We also had a couple of minutes to mingle before dinner, but mainly, my bustle took my Mom and Aunt about 20 min to figure out and get done properly. I like that there was a buffer of time before dinner in case little things like that came up.

Ugh, my bustle was a nightmare too! I ended up doing it myself in the church bathroom!

WinstonsGirl · October 2015

My dress was cut on a bias, so it swept sideways. They had to put in 12 French bustle style buttons to keep the sweep. The seamstress said she'd label the button/hooks numbers 1-12 so we could match them up, but either she forgot or they got steamed off when we were in Hawaii and there were no numbers. My Mom and Aunt started in the middle and worked their way out, but finding everything in all of the layers was a challenge for them. I felt bad that I couldn't really help

julieanne912 · October 2015

We did a few extended family pics and a couple more of us at the start of cocktail hour. Our venue was a barn with a big deck out front, so after pictures we just went and sat out on the deck, had some drinks that we got someone to get for us, and socialized with anybody who happened to be out there, and we got a few moments to ourselves also before our entrance inside.

Also in hindsight, I really enjoyed having that time to take a breather between the ceremony and reception, because our reception was on the short side and was non-stop once we went in.

Side note: I had an awesome waitstaff member who had plates ready for us at our sweetheart table, so we had about 10 minutes to eat right after our first dance (we did the first dance right after our entrance) but before a lot of the people passed by to go to the buffet. If she hadn't done that, I guarantee you we wouldn't have eaten.

southernbelle0915 · October 2015

What's the point?

1) awesome apps
2) delicious drinks
3) catching up/hanging out with people
4) giving everyone a chance to get there and get settled before stuff begins

Cocktail hour, IMHO, is the best part of a wedding. Weddings can have a lot of events, jumping from thing to thing (intros, 1st dances, toasts, table visits, cake cutting, bouquet toss, send off, etc..). It's nice to just have unstructured fun with great food and drinks.

arrippa · October 2015

southernbelle0915 said:

What's the point? 1) awesome apps 2) delicious drinks 3) catching up/hanging out with people 4) giving everyone a chance to get there and get settled before stuff begins Cocktail hour, IMHO, is the best part of a wedding. Weddings can have a lot of events, jumping from thing to thing (intros, 1st dances, toasts, table visits, cake cutting, bouquet toss, send off, etc..). It's nice to just have unstructured fun with great food and drinks.

This! It's my favorite part of the reception.

lc07 · October 2015

Agree with Lynda, Maggie and Starmoon.

Think about having a dinner party at your house. The second guests walk in the door you don't ask them to sit down and then start serving dinner that very minute. They greet other guests, are offered a drink and an appetizer, given a chance to use the rest room, hang up a coat, offer the host a gift (if they brought one), and mingle and settle in before the sit down dinner.

It's the same for a wedding. If your ceremony and reception sites are in different places it also allows for varying times of arrival by the guests.

anjemon · October 2015

I also really enjoyed our cocktail hour. We used ours to go upstairs and have the required people sign the marriage license. Then H and I just sat together in the empty room for awhile and enjoyed being married. And enjoyed the calm a bit, we're both introverts so the whole big party deal is a little draining, it was nice to have a break.

Then we went down and enjoyed the end of cocktail hour. It gave us a chance to talk to people before dinner started. We didn't really do a big entrance, so we didn't have to deal with that detail at all. Although we did enter the dinner space last, so it gave us a chance to greet some people as they went by.

redwoodoriginal · October 2015

We used ours to get a few pictures of us as actually married and then we got like 10min to just sit and talk just the two of us. A nice break between the business of the day. And have a little champagne toast. Then we joined the cocktail hour and used it to start saying hi to people!

knottie2b256f5c2ae42586 · October 2015

Thanks! Sorry, the logistics of the whole wedding day are sometimes lost on me. I have been to 2 weddings: my older sister's when I was about 10 and remember nothing and my brother's 2 years ago which I was a BM, so I did not go to cocktail hour at all.

I didn't consider cocktail hour as a "break" for everyone, but that makes total sense. Our ceremony and reception are in the same place and we plan (so far) on doing a FL. And I never thought of NOT having a cocktail hour, but I did only look at it as something for guests to do while others take pictures...not as a social event/break for guests.

Thanks!

kvruns · October 2015

We did first look and all pix before hand and therefore didn't do a cocktail hour. We did the receiving line and while guests were waking to the reception area (all in same venue) we took a 5 min breather and then joined no big grand entrance though the DJ announced us and then dinner almost immediately after that. Like you said we didn't see the point in a cocktail hour since we weren't taking pix

If all pics are done, what's the point of a cocktail hour?

Re: If all pics are done, what's the point of a cocktail hour?

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