Wedding Cakes & Food Forum

FI suggested guests make their own drinks

Yup.

He sure did.

Our venue allows us to use any vendor and provide alcohol however we want. The shelter house has a really nice stone bar with a good-sized cooler behind it. PERFECT for a bartender serving drinks. He suggested today that we provide all the drinks, but guests make/mix their own because "they're adults and are perfectly capable of doing that."

Ugh.

Re: FI suggested guests make their own drinks

  • Get a bartender.  Liability aside, think about how messy that bar will become.  Also, people will generally use a lot more alcohol then a bartender would in drinks, causing you to possibly need to purchase more alcohol or *gasp* run out of something.

  • Yeah, I'm going to make sure we get a bartender. Our venue, however, does not require us to hire one, but the venue also includes in the contract that they are free of any liability.

    Other than general etiquette, I did not think about the bar getting messy (and sticky!!) and guests using more alcohol than a bartender would. I'll definitely bring these up with FI! 

  • No. Aside from the liability and cleanliness issues, many guests, adults or not, can't make their own drinks-they don't know how. Nor should guests be expected to thank themselves for attending a wedding by mixing their own drinks.
  • Definitely get a bartender. Otherwise you'll be stuck learning that the real definition of "two fingers of Jameson" and Aunt Gertrude's definition are a wee bit different when dear Auntie is dancing on tables.
  • Considering the "level" of wedding...  But really - have a bartender because of liability - not just for the risk of Party'hardy Penelope who needs to be cut off, but because if a teenager wanders in and serves themselves up a beer or Rum & Coke, gets caught, guess who gets arrested and hauled to jail for fingerprints on their wedding night.  It's just all around a good idea... 
  • Thanks @lyndausvi @banana468 @MesmrEwe

    I don't think he considered many of these things when the idea popped into his head. Of course, we are always trying to find the most affordable option for us, but I do think that this is really pushing it; he just doesn't want to pay for a bartender. I told him I didn't think it was a good idea and that people shouldn't have to do anything at our wedding, but he doesn't think our friends/family would care. But, I know it's not about whether or not those people would care - it's about hosting them properly and being considerate.

  • If you really want to avoid having to spring for a bartender, how about doing what some friends of mine did at their very, very casual reception this summer?  The groom is a master cocktail mixologist, and he made large quantities of half a dozen signature drinks and put them in those dispensers with the little spout at the bottom.  Then he also had big tubs filled with beer and non-alcoholic beverages.  Guests could help themselves--no bartender needed--but they didn't have to mix anything themselves.  

    None of the guests were under 21, though, so he didn't have that to contend with.
  • Thanks for the idea! @SaintPaulGal! I did not think about that. I will have to look into that for sure because that could be a good compromise for us

  • If you really want to avoid having to spring for a bartender, how about doing what some friends of mine did at their very, very casual reception this summer?  The groom is a master cocktail mixologist, and he made large quantities of half a dozen signature drinks and put them in those dispensers with the little spout at the bottom.  Then he also had big tubs filled with beer and non-alcoholic beverages.  Guests could help themselves--no bartender needed--but they didn't have to mix anything themselves.  

    None of the guests were under 21, though, so he didn't have that to contend with.
    Just keep in mind that someone still needs to be on hand to refill the containers and tubs when things start to run low.

  • marie2785marie2785 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited October 2015
    Liability is a big issue--check your local laws. In Michigan where I bar-tended, if a person is served alcohol, and then gets into a drunk driving or other accident, the person/bar/host of the event where they got served last shares liability for the accident. This means you could be PERSONALLY sued if one of your guests injures or kills someone. Having a bartender with insurance is totally worth it in this case.

    And yes, these lawsuits happen. We had an (of age) college student go and drunk drive and kill someone. Our bar's lawyers were able to prove his last drink was in fact not at the bar, but at a friends house. So the person who died's family sued the daylights out of a college student who gave the kid his last drink since the bar was found not to be liable. My boss said they got sued every year for something along those lines. 
  • Jax43615 said:

    Thanks @lyndausvi @banana468 @MesmrEwe

    I don't think he considered many of these things when the idea popped into his head. Of course, we are always trying to find the most affordable option for us, but I do think that this is really pushing it; he just doesn't want to pay for a bartender. I told him I didn't think it was a good idea and that people shouldn't have to do anything at our wedding, but he doesn't think our friends/family would care. But, I know it's not about whether or not those people would care - it's about hosting them properly and being considerate.

    It's also about protecting yourself from liability.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Thank you for the advice! I know he is concerned about spending the money, but I think it would be a poor decision to not have one.

    @Maggie0829 I was just thinking about this today! I definitely don't want to have to keep an eye on the beverages all night.

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