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Mom needs to butt out.

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,
So my husband has a best friend from the time they were in diapers. “Steve” was in the Army and served in Iraq but has serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job. However, he is a delight with my toddler and his service dog. He lives in our guest room and takes care of my toddler while I am at class and my husband works. The house is clean, my son is happy, and we save so much money in child care. My mother says this situation is unnatural but I am happy. I have no problem with living like this for the next decade. Steve makes my husband happy and has nothing else but bad breaks in life (the VA is a joke). Is my mother right?

—Love My Second Husband

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Re: Mom needs to butt out.

  • thefanciestbecklerthefanciestbeckler member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I always like to lurk these posts. I don't see that this is any of her mother's business. If I had a close friend or family member that out of a job and willing to help out around the house/watch the kids, I'd do it in a heartbeat!

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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    thefanciestbeckler said:
    I always like to lurk these posts. I don't see that this is any of her mother's business. If I had a close friend or family member that out of a job and willing to help out around the house/watch the kids, I'd do it in a heartbeat!
    Please, jump in more often!! 
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  • thefanciestbecklerthefanciestbeckler member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    Ok then, @mrs.conn23  I will :)

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  • GBCKGBCK member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    Dude, who doesn't want a trusted nanny?

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  • NOLABridesmaidNOLABridesmaid member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    You know., I thought about this one and I'm not sure. I know that men can make great nannies and equal rights...yada yada.

    However, I probably wouldn't be down for this long term. Plus, throw in a touch of possible PTSD, and truthfully, I would probably have other long term child care lined up.

    image
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  • HeffalumpHeffalump member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I don't care about the male thing, but I did have my own concerns about "serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job."  Trying to figure out what is so serious that it prevents him from holding down a job, but is NBD when watching a toddler.

    Still, this:

    PMeg819 said:
    Her mother is a bitch.


    �
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its
    mrs.conn23 said:

    Dear Prudence,
    So my husband has a best friend from the time they were in diapers. “Steve” was in the Army and served in Iraq but has serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job. However, he is a delight with my toddler and his service dog. He lives in our guest room and takes care of my toddler while I am at class and my husband works. The house is clean, my son is happy, and we save so much money in child care. My mother says this situation is unnatural but I am happy. I have no problem with living like this for the next decade. Steve makes my husband happy and has nothing else but bad breaks in life (the VA is a joke). Is my mother right?

    —Love My Second Husband

    Thank you! Thank you for helping a Veteran and giving him purpose.  Mother needs to butt out.
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  • levioosalevioosa member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    thefanciestbeckler said:
    I always like to lurk these posts. I don't see that this is any of her mother's business. If I had a close friend or family member that out of a job and willing to help out around the house/watch the kids, I'd do it in a heartbeat!
    Ditto Beckler with lurking the posts!  While I agree that this is none of her mother's business, the issues that come with an "inability to hold down a job," concern me.  PTSD is no joke.  My ex had it, and when we were together I was seriously concerned for our future children.  You couldn't startle him, or he would lash out instinctually, and he struck to incapacitate.  Now, if his issues stem from an injury that make it difficult for him to do certain tasks or consistently do routine hours, I totally understand that.  But that's not the way the letter came off, and that concerns me.  

    But, I stand with everyone else on: mom is a bitch.  


    image
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    Everafterstar said:
    mrs.conn23 said:

    Dear Prudence,
    So my husband has a best friend from the time they were in diapers. “Steve” was in the Army and served in Iraq but has serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job. However, he is a delight with my toddler and his service dog. He lives in our guest room and takes care of my toddler while I am at class and my husband works. The house is clean, my son is happy, and we save so much money in child care. My mother says this situation is unnatural but I am happy. I have no problem with living like this for the next decade. Steve makes my husband happy and has nothing else but bad breaks in life (the VA is a joke). Is my mother right?

    —Love My Second Husband

    Thank you! Thank you for helping a Veteran and giving him purpose.  Mother needs to butt out.
    *sigh*

    @mrs.conn23 is the best, isn't she?
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its
    *Barbie* said:
    Everafterstar said:
    mrs.conn23 said:

    Dear Prudence,
    So my husband has a best friend from the time they were in diapers. “Steve” was in the Army and served in Iraq but has serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job. However, he is a delight with my toddler and his service dog. He lives in our guest room and takes care of my toddler while I am at class and my husband works. The house is clean, my son is happy, and we save so much money in child care. My mother says this situation is unnatural but I am happy. I have no problem with living like this for the next decade. Steve makes my husband happy and has nothing else but bad breaks in life (the VA is a joke). Is my mother right?

    —Love My Second Husband

    Thank you! Thank you for helping a Veteran and giving him purpose.  Mother needs to butt out.
    *sigh*

    @mrs.conn23 is the best, isn't she?

    That is if you actually believed mrs.conn23 actually wrote this. LOL!

    I was however addressing the writer of this letter to "Dear Prudence", and in my enthusiasm, I replied knowing that many Veterans need support. I really applaud this woman for standing up to a mother who needs to butt out!

    I do appreciate mrs.conn23 for sharing this letter so that everyone who reads the forums can see the challenges many veterans come home to as well.

    Thanks! :)


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  • HeffalumpHeffalump member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    *Barbie* said:
    Everafterstar said:
    mrs.conn23 said:

    Dear Prudence,
    So my husband has a best friend from the time they were in diapers. “Steve” was in the Army and served in Iraq but has serious issues that prevent him from holding a regular job. However, he is a delight with my toddler and his service dog. He lives in our guest room and takes care of my toddler while I am at class and my husband works. The house is clean, my son is happy, and we save so much money in child care. My mother says this situation is unnatural but I am happy. I have no problem with living like this for the next decade. Steve makes my husband happy and has nothing else but bad breaks in life (the VA is a joke). Is my mother right?

    —Love My Second Husband

    Thank you! Thank you for helping a Veteran and giving him purpose.  Mother needs to butt out.
    *sigh*

    @mrs.conn23 is the best, isn't she?
    As DH likes to say:  ain't surprised.
    �
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