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Bridesmaid Gifts - Confused - Help!

[Deleted User][Deleted User] member
25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I'm getting ready to pop the question to my bridesmaids and I need guidance. Is a simple card sent in the mail enough or is the bridesmaid gift needed? I'm a designer and I customized a nice card for each girl but I see everyone going crazy and sending pricey gifts with their "pop the question".  Confused???

I figured I would give them their gifts the night before the wedding at rehearsal.
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Re: Bridesmaid Gifts - Confused - Help!

  • geebee908geebee908 member
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    PolskaBlondynka said:
    I'm getting ready to pop the question to my bridesmaids and I need guidance. Is a simple card sent in the mail enough or is the bridesmaid gift needed? I'm a designer and I customized a nice card for each girl but I see everyone going crazy and sending pricey gifts with their "pop the question".  Confused???

    I figured I would give them their gifts the night before the wedding at rehearsal.

    Those pricey gifts also might "guilt" someone into saying yes who might otherwise, for whatever reason, need to say no to being a bridesmaid. It's better to do something simple as you have planned and give them a thank you gift at the time of the wedding.
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  • levioosalevioosa member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    PolskaBlondynka said:
    I'm getting ready to pop the question to my bridesmaids and I need guidance. Is a simple card sent in the mail enough or is the bridesmaid gift needed? I'm a designer and I customized a nice card for each girl but I see everyone going crazy and sending pricey gifts with their "pop the question".  Confused???

    I figured I would give them their gifts the night before the wedding at rehearsal.
    Are you talking about gifts to be a BM, or gifts for them for the wedding?  The gifts you give them don't have to be expensive or flashy.  Shop for each girl like you would for their birthday.  As far as asking them, just call them up and tell them they mean so much to you and you'd love them to be a BM.  Simple.  


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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    What @Ghostie625 said. You don't need to give them gifts now. A heartfelt card is very nice (but definitely not required). These are your closest friends and family and you're honoring them by asking them to stand up with you on your wedding day, you're not "proposing" or "popping a question" to them. 
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Thanks, Charlotte. I don't follow wedding trends closely. When I googled "how to ask someone to be a bridesmaid", most came up with "How to Pop the QS to Your Friends" or something along the line. So that is the best way I could describe it, haha.
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  • glasgowtolondonglasgowtolondon member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    PolskaBlondynka said:
    THANKS, GIRLS! 

    I definitely don't want to guilt them with a flashy gift. I gave a little bit of a touch of myself into each card, which I think is enough -- simple. Of course, I will get them a lovely gift for being at my wedding, there's no QS about it.
    The cards sound lovely, and a really sweet touch. No more necessary! I'm sure your friends/family will be touched.
                 
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  • justsiejustsie member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    The PPs have given great advice! When is your wedding? Keep in mind you only really need to ask them around 8 months prior to your wedding date, any sooner than that and you risk relationships changing!
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    PolskaBlondynka said:
    Thanks, Charlotte. I don't follow wedding trends closely. When I googled "how to ask someone to be a bridesmaid", most came up with "How to Pop the QS to Your Friends" or something along the line. So that is the best way I could describe it, haha.
    Oh I understand. I just meant that the whole "wedding industry" makes you think this needs to be some big production and it really doesn't. Your plans sound lovely. 
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  • OwningAHome1981OwningAHome1981 member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    A gift afterward @ the rehearsal dinner is fine. You don't need to give them something when you are asking them.
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  • dyerwisedyerwise member
    250 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments First Answer
    I asked my 3 sisters and my best friend, I think all of them assumed that they would be asked to be bridesmaids.

    I gave them each a card in person and a bottle of Essie nail called "Bachelorette Bash". I know that all 4 girls like hot pink nail polish and something cheesy with word play is 100% my sense of humor. I also gave them each their favorite treat (one sister is obsessed with Oreo's, another loves gobstoppers). 

    I definitely don't think its necessary,  but I just wanted to personalized it a little bit.


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