Moms and Maids
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bridesmaid problems

I'm getting married in two months and I'm having a bit of a problem with my bridesmaids regarding their dresses. As all of my bridesmaids are different shapes and sizes, I picked a color and a length and told them they could get whatever dress they were most comfortable in as long as it was in that color and length. I told them this six months ago, and yet, as of last week, not a single one of them had even bothered to go look for dresses. Turns out that the color is one that takes longer to order, which has limited their dress selections quite a lot. My future sister-in-law in particular is throwing a (passive-aggressive) fit about it. I keep trying to explain to her that she needs to order a dress ASAP or she will not have one for the wedding, and she keeps putting it off because she doesn't like the options that are available after waiting so long. 

And another of my bridesmaids messaged me and told me that she found the perfect dress, but it's a different shade than the one I asked her to get. She still wants to get it even though it's the wrong color. 

I'm not sure what to do in this situation. I've tried talking to them and explaining the situation, but because we don't live close we rely on texting or messaging and they mostly ignore any texts I send about it. I feel like I'm annoying them because I message them once a day, but I don't know what else to do to make sure that this gets remedied. 

Any advice? 

Re: bridesmaid problems

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    What color did you tell them to order? 
    My daughter just told her ladies to get a short dress in hydrangea blue.  They chose three different shades, and they looked beautiful together.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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    I'm getting married in two months and I'm having a bit of a problem with my bridesmaids regarding their dresses. As all of my bridesmaids are different shapes and sizes, I picked a color and a length and told them they could get whatever dress they were most comfortable in as long as it was in that color and length. I told them this six months ago, and yet, as of last week, not a single one of them had even bothered to go look for dresses. Turns out that the color is one that takes longer to order, which has limited their dress selections quite a lot. My future sister-in-law in particular is throwing a (passive-aggressive) fit about it. I keep trying to explain to her that she needs to order a dress ASAP or she will not have one for the wedding, and she keeps putting it off because she doesn't like the options that are available after waiting so long. 

    And another of my bridesmaids messaged me and told me that she found the perfect dress, but it's a different shade than the one I asked her to get. She still wants to get it even though it's the wrong color. 

    I'm not sure what to do in this situation. I've tried talking to them and explaining the situation, but because we don't live close we rely on texting or messaging and they mostly ignore any texts I send about it. I feel like I'm annoying them because I message them once a day, but I don't know what else to do to make sure that this gets remedied. 

    Any advice? 
    First off, I'd stop messaging them daily; I'd ignore your texts, too, if you sent me a reminder every day to get my dress!  
    Secondly, are the dresses that are available in your color and length still in your BM's budgets?  Maybe the affordable ones are sold out?  
    At this point, you have a couple options:
    1. Trust your BMs to get their dresses in by the wedding.  They'll either have them or they won't; if they don't, they don't have to stand up with you, they can just attend as a guest, or you can opt to have them stand up with you in whatever it is they're wearing.
    2. If it really is too late for anyone to order a BM dress, go back to the drawing board and change your vision to something that they can get off the rack or at a department store--yeah, they may not be exactly the same color, but they will still look beautiful standing up next to you!  This is also the most budget-friendly option for your girls, just in case someone's budget has changed and they're not comfortable telling you (maybe someone told you they could spend $200 on a dress, but now they're only comfortable spending $100).  
    3. Get each BM's measurements and pay for the dresses yourself.  If you absolutely HAVE to have them all standing next to you in the shade you picked out, this might be your best option if you can afford it.  That way you won't have to worry about any BMs wearing street clothes to your wedding.
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    edited March 2016
    I don't think there's anything wrong with having different shades.

    ETF grammar

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    Honestly at this point I'd probably just tell them to get any [Insert general color like blue, green, red] dress they'd like. Hopefully the important thing is having these people stand next to you, not the shade of dress they are wearing. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    if there is enough time to still order a dress online and they are worried about budget, target's bridesmaid dresses are great. very inexpensive, ships quick and tons of colors. good luck!
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    2 months is still plenty of time to get a dress. I think I would open up the colour choice a bit (different shades of a colour can look stunning in photographs) and then sit back and trust that your maids will find something appropriate.
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