Hotel accommodations for bridal party?

GlamQueenBride · March 2016

Are you required to provide hotel accommodations for your bridal party?

OliveOilsMom · March 2016

GlamQueenBride said:

Are you required to provide hotel accommodations for your bridal party?

No. If you have an OOT BM and you can swing it, it might be nice to offer her hotel stay. But its not required.

As a BM I have been offered the opportunity to stay in the bride's suite the night before the wedding a few times. I took up that opportunity twice since both times my H was not able to come up for the RD or stay over the night before the wedding. I would carpool with another BM and H would drive up the next day for the wedding. But we always had our own room the night of the wedding, obviously!

geebee908 · March 2016

GlamQueenBride said:

Are you required to provide hotel accommodations for your bridal party?

If you are requiring that they be there a certain amount of time that would require x nights in the hotel, I think you should. However, if you are letting them set their own schedule for when they will be there, that should be a part of their expected expenses to attend your wedding.

AddieCake · March 2016

No.

GlamQueenBride · March 2016

The wedding is about 3 hours from home so every member of the bridal party is from out of town (some are from other areas of the country, flying in). I'm only requiring they be there the day of. Rehearsal and RD is optional the night before. I just didn't know if I was supposed to pay for their accommodations since it's a co-ed bridal party (8 people) and some have significant others with them so it would be more than just getting an extra room. I'd likely be looking at least 5 rooms and that's if a couple of the girls agree to double up.

photokitty · March 2016

GlamQueenBride said:

The wedding is about 3 hours from home so every member of the bridal party is from out of town (some are from other areas of the country, flying in). I'm only requiring they be there the day of. Rehearsal and RD is optional the night before. I just didn't know if I was supposed to pay for their accommodations since it's a co-ed bridal party (8 people) and some have significant others with them so it would be more than just getting an extra room. I'd likely be looking at least 5 rooms and that's if a couple of the girls agree to double up.

Nope, they can pay for their own or leave early and drive home. You are under no obligation to pay for their hotel.

GlamQueenBride · March 2016

Thanks guys!

banana468 · March 2016

Ditto. But what's nice is to arrange for hotel blocks in a few price points.

poodledoodleooo · March 2016

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

sparklepants41 · March 2016

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

Thank you for this. I was a bridesmaid in an OOT Friday wedding a little over 4 years ago. I was required to stay at the 5-star hotel the B&G were staying at, which was over $600 per night. And I had to stay three nights. It was a bit of a financial strain (on top of airfare, $400 dress, gift, B-party, etc.). Had I not been required to stay at this hotel I totally would have found somewhere cheaper nearby.

holyguacamole79 · March 2016

sparklepants41 said:

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

Thank you for this. I was a bridesmaid in an OOT Friday wedding a little over 4 years ago. I was required to stay at the 5-star hotel the B&G were staying at, which was over $600 per night. And I had to stay three nights. It was a bit of a financial strain (on top of airfare, $400 dress, gift, B-party, etc.). Had I not been required to stay at this hotel I totally would have found somewhere cheaper nearby.

I would've done it anyway.

sparklepants41 · March 2016

holyguacamole79 said:

sparklepants41 said:

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

Thank you for this. I was a bridesmaid in an OOT Friday wedding a little over 4 years ago. I was required to stay at the 5-star hotel the B&G were staying at, which was over $600 per night. And I had to stay three nights. It was a bit of a financial strain (on top of airfare, $400 dress, gift, B-party, etc.). Had I not been required to stay at this hotel I totally would have found somewhere cheaper nearby.

I would've done it anyway.

I have since grown a spine lol.

MesmrEwe · March 2016

holyguacamole79 said:

sparklepants41 said:

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

Thank you for this. I was a bridesmaid in an OOT Friday wedding a little over 4 years ago. I was required to stay at the 5-star hotel the B&G were staying at, which was over $600 per night. And I had to stay three nights. It was a bit of a financial strain (on top of airfare, $400 dress, gift, B-party, etc.). Had I not been required to stay at this hotel I totally would have found somewhere cheaper nearby.

I would've done it anyway.

Ditto!!! Even now I'd do this even if it meant an hour commute!!!

Pinksatin91016 · March 2016

sparklepants41 said:

holyguacamole79 said:

sparklepants41 said:

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

Thank you for this. I was a bridesmaid in an OOT Friday wedding a little over 4 years ago. I was required to stay at the 5-star hotel the B&G were staying at, which was over $600 per night. And I had to stay three nights. It was a bit of a financial strain (on top of airfare, $400 dress, gift, B-party, etc.). Had I not been required to stay at this hotel I totally would have found somewhere cheaper nearby.

I would've done it anyway.

I have since grown a spine lol.

Good for you on that spine @sparklepants41 ! I would also not have bought any gifts. $400 dress is more than I've ever spent on a dress, and $600 is more than I've even spent on staying anywhere. In my opinion, even if it's a close friend, by paying for those things to be part of the wedding day, that is more than enough of a gift. I didn't buy my (very very close) cousin any gifts when I was a bridesmaid because I had to take off work, buy a plane ticket, and buy a dress and shoes for her wedding. Plus I made handmade hair pieces for all the bridal party which took a lot of time and a decent amount of money. (They turned out amazing) We are still close even without a gift.

lc07 · March 2016

geebee908 said:

GlamQueenBride said:

Are you required to provide hotel accommodations for your bridal party?

If you are requiring that they be there a certain amount of time that would require x nights in the hotel, I think you should. However, if you are letting them set their own schedule for when they will be there, that should be a part of their expected expenses to attend your wedding.

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

PPs have you covered, OP. The answer is no.

And regarding the quoted, it's never okay to dictate where someone stays to attend your wedding or how long they stay even if you offer to pay for it.

KnickerGold · March 2016

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

And if you're requiring them to stay at a specific hotel, you foot the bill AND they get their own rooms. A good friend was required to stay at a hotel, paid for by the bride, but *surprise* she was bunking with 3 other BMs who she'd never met (which meant she was sharing a bed with a stranger)
Did I mention her FI had come with? And had to stay elsewhere, last minute? Because no one mentioned that the reserved room wasn't just for them as they'd been told?
Oy.

flantastic · March 2016

KnickerGold said:

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

I agree with PPs! I also wanted to add (for lurkers) that if you're (general you're, not OP who doesn't seem to be doing this) requiring someone to stay in this specific hotel then I think you should foot the bill.

And if you're requiring them to stay at a specific hotel, you foot the bill AND they get their own rooms. A good friend was required to stay at a hotel, paid for by the bride, but *surprise* she was bunking with 3 other BMs who she'd never met (which meant she was sharing a bed with a stranger)
Did I mention her FI had come with? And had to stay elsewhere, last minute? Because no one mentioned that the reserved room wasn't just for them as they'd been told?
Oy.

Yep, my SO would be staying somewhere else last minute... and I'd be with them.

Hotel accommodations for bridal party?

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