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Is this tacky/rude?

[Deleted User][Deleted User] member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Is it tacky/rude to put on a registry that you don't want gift cards from certain places?  Our registry is slightly complicated because my fiance is Canadian and lives in Canada and I am in the states and will be moving to Canada after the wedding. Because half of the people coming to our wedding are from Canada (we are getting married in the states), because of many factors we set up registries in both countries.  Yesterday as I was updating our registries, I realized that it is possible for us to receive gift cards to some of the American stores/websites that will be completely useless after we get married.  I feel so dumb, I don't know why I didn't think of this before.  Is there a way to politely ask to not receive gift cards from certain places?  Thanks!
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Re: Is this tacky/rude?

  • bleve0821bleve0821 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited May 2016
    If you do get gift cards you can't use, you can sell them on Raise.com to make a little extra cash.  You wouldn't be able to net the whole worth of the card (they take I think 15%), but that's an option.  Some cash >> gift card you can't use.

    ETA Please indicate in the title of this thread that it's a cross-post.


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

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  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Make sure that gift cards aren't listed on your registry.  You can also spread by word of mouth that you're not looking for gift cards.  In case you received one though- the places you're registering don't offer online shopping/shipping to Canada?
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  • auriannaaurianna member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I'm confused.
    Gift cards shouldn't be on your registry to begin with.

    Or do you mean that you registered at an American store and you're worried someone will just give you a gift card to it?
    Unless you registered at some very obscure places, I assume any gift cards you'd get you would still be able to use online.
    Or you could donate them.
    Or you could give them to your American friends/family.

    I wouldn't stress about this one too much.
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  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Could you not use gift cards to order from the stores' websites? FWIW, we got very few giftcards, and the ones we did get were mostly to the locations of our registries. Mostly we got boxed gifts (mostly from the registries), checks, and cash.
    image
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  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited May 2016
    It wouldn't be appropriate to state "no gift cards"- as you should never dictate a gift, always graciously accept whatever is given.

    If your registry has an option for gift cards, definitely remove that. Some places automatically include that, but you can log in online and remove it.

    Word of mouth is also an option.

    If someone still gets you a gift card, do your best to use it before you move, or give it to a family member who can use it.

    ETA: Living in Canada, I know well that not all U.S. stores will ship to Canada- BOOOOOO! It's getting better though, and usually the big chains are good.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited May 2016
    SP29 said:
    It wouldn't be appropriate to state "no gift cards"- as you should never dictate a gift, always graciously accept whatever is given.

    If your registry has an option for gift cards, definitely remove that. Some places automatically include that, but you can log in online and remove it.

    Word of mouth is also an option.

    If someone still gets you a gift card, do your best to use it before you move, or give it to a family member who can use it.

    ETA: Living in Canada, I know well that not all U.S. stores will ship to Canada- BOOOOOO! It's getting better though, and usually the big chains are good.


    Besides all the immigration stuff, Canadian/US registries have been more of a headache than I would have ever thought.  We are registered at Hudsons Bay, Bloomingdales, amazon.com and amazon.ca, and Crate and Barrel.  Crate and Barrel has been the easiest to deal with thus far, but it is still a pain in the butt- have to return gifts here in the states, call corporate to have the shop card transferred to Canadian dollars, wait for it to arrive in the mail, then call a store and reorder everything.  Everywhere we have registered will ship to Canada, but the international shipping literally doubles the price of whatever was purchased....
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  • LondonLisaLondonLisa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited May 2016
    Knottie1427750250 said:
    SP29 said:
    It wouldn't be appropriate to state "no gift cards"- as you should never dictate a gift, always graciously accept whatever is given.

    If your registry has an option for gift cards, definitely remove that. Some places automatically include that, but you can log in online and remove it.

    Word of mouth is also an option.

    If someone still gets you a gift card, do your best to use it before you move, or give it to a family member who can use it.

    ETA: Living in Canada, I know well that not all U.S. stores will ship to Canada- BOOOOOO! It's getting better though, and usually the big chains are good.


    Besides all the immigration stuff, Canadian/US registries have been more of a headache than I would have ever thought.  We are registered at Hudsons Bay, Bloomingdales, amazon.com and amazon.ca, and Crate and Barrel.  Crate and Barrel has been the easiest to deal with thus far, but it is still a pain in the butt- have to return gifts here in the states, call corporate to have the shop card transferred to Canadian dollars, wait for it to arrive in the mail, then call a store and reorder everything.  Everywhere we have registered will ship to Canada, but the international shipping literally doubles the price of whatever was purchased....
    So you are never going back to your parents house, ever? You are never planning on going to Anerica again? You are moving literally the day after you get married and can't pick up things you didn't get as gifts?  You aren't planning on buying remaining things from your registry for completion? You don't shop online and pick things up when you're home for holidays? 

    There is no way to say "none of X gifts" without seeming really rude. Just take off gift card options on your registry, and if someone gets you one anyway, write a thank you note and figure it out. 
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  • mollybarker11mollybarker11 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    As previous posters have said, you should remove any mention of gift cards from your registries, but I don't foresee this being a big enough issue that you should spread your concern by word of mouth. If you do get a gift card to an American store, you can always
    • have something shipped to a friend/relative in the US and pick it up whenever you visit to avoid the extra costs of international shipping
    • use it in-store whenever you visit
    • give it to someone living in America

    Knottie1427750250 said:
    Crate and Barrel has been the easiest to deal with thus far, but it is still a pain in the butt- have to return gifts here in the states, call corporate to have the shop card transferred to Canadian dollars, wait for it to arrive in the mail, then call a store and reorder everything.
    I'm not sure I understand this bit. Is this the procedure in case you receive a gift card for C&B or are you planning to return any boxed gifts you get at the wedding and re-buy them in Canada rather than moving with them? If so, I think you would be better off removing registries altogether and spreading the word that you're tight on packing space! Most guests will then realize that cash is a better option for you.
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