Table Numbers w/ Somewhat Separated Spaces

rebecca+m · May 2016

I'm pretty sure the answer here is already clear, but:
Our reception space is partly outdoors, partly in, and the indoors space is in two rooms - a long hall where the ceremony will be and a fairly typical reception hall. The ceremony space will be changed over to reception seating - I've been at previous events in the space and they are pros; the changeover should be ten minutes, tops. Extremely large sliding doors - like barn door size - will be open between the spaces.
I had really wanted to do table numbers, because it does seem like people like knowing they have a seat with their whole group and with other people they know. We weren't going to do individual place cards, just tables.
But there's no way to do that with these three separate (connected, but distinct) spaces, is there? (Ten tables in the reception space, six outside, five in the ceremony space.) I can't predict who would like to sit outside, or who might prefer the quieter switched-over ceremony space (farther from the band). And a table in the ceremony space would mean guests have to wait. Not for very long, but it would still be unfair, right?
(Outside tables are, of course, weather permitting - we can squeeze the necessary tables into the inside spaces if the weather is NOT permitting, it will just mean less dance floor and less flow between tables.)

jenna8984 · May 2016

With that many tables it sounds like it could become a clusterf-k for people to choose their own seating. I would still number the tables and assign the tables. It doesn't sound like any section is better or worse than another section. Like if it were raining and the people assigned outside were stuck with that there would be a problem. But since you're able to move them inside then those tables are treated equally and no one will feel upset that you sat them there. As the night goes on, people will move about and mingle where they want to in all the spaces.

Jen4948 · May 2016

To be honest, this venue doesn't sound like it's going to work for you.

Everyone needs to be seated in the same space. You can't have some people seated indoors and some outdoors, some in one room and some in another. Whether it's intentional or not, it smacks of favoritism and reverse favoritism, and people aren't going to understand why some people are seated inside and some outside.

Also, there shouldn't be a "changeover" between the ceremony and reception where nobody has a place to sit. Unfortunately, due to a venue error, this occurred at my brother's wedding. Family and wedding party photos were being taken between the ceremony and reception, but the guests were crammed into a tight little space to wait for the reception area to open up (they were actually in different rooms, but the reception room wasn't ready when the ceremony ended), and we were stuck waiting in there for a long time even after we were finished with the photos. The wait took away from the otherwise enjoyable hospitality.

jenna8984 · May 2016

Jen4948 said:

To be honest, this venue doesn't sound like it's going to work for you.

Everyone needs to be seated in the same space. You can't have some people seated indoors and some outdoors, some in one room and some in another. Whether it's intentional or not, it smacks of favoritism and reverse favoritism, and people aren't going to understand why some people are seated inside and some outside.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I read it as one big open- concept space. Some tables will be under a roof and some not, but as a whole it's one giant space where everyone can see everyone. To me, this is not a big deal. If these spaces truly are separate in that one can't see everything from their table, then I agree with you it's not a good idea.

rebecca+m · May 2016

Sorry, perhaps I was unclear about the changeover: that is just the ceremony space. The larger space and the outdoor space will already be set up, with enough seating for everyone who isn't needed for pictures - the attendants, my immediate family, and my fiancé's immediate family.
Also, I've attached an image of the space to help explain what I mean by "separate" - the doors to the patio in this image are a little misleading, because they are not, in person, door-sized; each door is more like five across or so? So the doorways to the patio, which will be open, will be a ten foot space and a twenty foot space. There are also several floor to ceiling windows.

I should have noted in the original post: our reception starts at 8, so we are doing passed hors d'oeuvres, not a seated dinner. We could move the dancing and band outside, moving all of the tables inside, but I actually would like to sit outside if we can.

jenna8984 · May 2016

Oh yea, now that I see the picture, I do not like some outdoor tables. Even with the massive open doors, there will still be a giant pane of glass separating them and making them feel like outsiders looking in on the fishbowl. I definitely vote to move the DJ/dance floor outside and all tables inside. You could maybe have some high tops around the edges of the patio if people want to be near the music but sitting down. Those wouldn't be assigned as a table, just a sit for a few minutes station.

rebecca+m · May 2016

That does sound like a good alternative; thanks for your input! I guess I felt weird about separating the dancing, but that does make more sense that separating the people.

flantastic · May 2016

I have attended a wedding with a multi-room setup, even with large open doorways, and was in one of the "extended" rooms. It did feel like we were kind of tucked away, and a second tier.

The worst part was that it was a buffet dinner, and no one really indicated when each set of tables was supposed to go, so people had to be sort of peeking out and walking back and forth to see what was going on. We also couldn't really see or hear much of the toasts and stuff, and almost missed dessert entirely for the same reason as the buffet mess. Make sure you're either doing a plated dinner or the staff clearly indicates what's up to your guests, or really both.

charlotte989875 · May 2016

I would definitely try to sit everyone inside, high tops outside with the DJ and dancing so people can stand around if they're not into dancing, but I'd have everyone be able to sit in the same place.

Do you have more seats and tables than you have guests? If you really have space only for those who are attending (as in no extra seating) I would definitely assign tables. People like to have a "home base" to put their things and they will want to sit with people they know. If you had a ton of extra room you could make open seating possible but you'd need extra because there tends to be open spaces (single chairs or pairs because people don't like to sit with people they don't know).

YogaSandy · May 2016

If tables were assigned, I would be furious if I was sat outside, and would probably leave. Now, I'm always always cold, so I'd be shivering all evening. I also have horrible horrible horrible allergies. And I hate nature and outside. Now, if we were friends, you would know this and most likely not seat me outside. If we were not so close cousins, or I was someone's SO (or plus one) you didn't know, you wouldn't know this and might seat me outside. I would be miserable. (And no, I rarely eat on patios at restaurants, and when I do, I hate it).

rebecca+m · May 2016

I had built in about a dozen extra seats, but I'm not sure if that will be enough for free-for-all-seating.
Another thing I am trying to consider is that seating charts are not ever done in this group of people. I have been to...probably twenty of their weddings, maybe more? Fiancé has been to another dozen or so? And then there is family history. In all of the guests whose weddings we know about, ONE couple had a seating chart. But I really liked it! But they also had a completely different wedding: small (30ish?), destination, served dinner.
I was actually wondering if I was even in the clear to do seating if we weren't serving a full dinner, but the answers here seem strongly pro, as long as I don't seat people outside.

rebecca+m · May 2016

YogaSandy said:

If tables were assigned, I would be furious if I was sat outside, and would probably leave. Now, I'm always always cold, so I'd be shivering all evening. I also have horrible horrible horrible allergies. And I hate nature and outside. Now, if we were friends, you would know this and most likely not seat me outside. If we were not so close cousins, or I was someone's SO (or plus one) you didn't know, you wouldn't know this and might seat me outside. I would be miserable. (And no, I rarely eat on patios at restaurants, and when I do, I hate it).

Well, cold won't be a problem (that's actually why I wanted to sit outside), but I am hearing you that the bigger point is just Not Outside.
We already have some fans and some shawls for guests who are uncomfortable either way, but I think I'll be looking to see if the venue could either (a) do some outside fans for a dance floor there or (b) get creative and move things around a bit inside to fit the needed tables and a smaller dance space, leaving the patio for just lounging. If I did assign, cutting the need for extra seats, and then moved us to a sweetheart, I could cut two tables...I've just got to crunch some numbers.
Oh, and while I am on this topic, sort of, I'd take feedback on whether I'm I handling this right: I have given babies (considered here <18 mos.) a seat, because I figure their parents need that space for Baby Things.

ETA clarity

mollybarker11 · May 2016

I think with that many tables/guests it's even more important to have a seating chart!

I second the suggestion to not seat anyone outdoors but have that space as the dance floor with a few small (unassigned) tables & chairs.

If you are able to have the outdoor space reserved for just lounging, would you be fitting everyone in the Main Gallery and using the ceremony space/Gallery 1 for the dance floor? I do think if there are tables in Gallery 1 some people somewhere would be cut off from the toasts etc.

rebecca+m · May 2016

I think there will need to be tables in Gallery 1, but they can be placed near the archway and we can do toasts in that archway. I also have some family that I think are quite likely to prefer the quieter, easier-to-slip-away from, seating, and I may just ask them, because even just a couple of the larger families would fill out that space nicely.
(A note: if I decide to ask them, it will be very much a "this space is available IF it sounds appealing," not "hey we need to seat some people here." If they're not interested, we'll make it work.)

rebecca+m · May 2016

I'm also considering seating our attendants in the Gallery One space, since they will have to be up for pictures anyway. If I add another bar to just this space, I think it will encourage flow, and my attendants will be mostly dancing anyway, they have already proclaimed.

kahluakoala · May 2016

YogaSandy said:

If tables were assigned, I would be furious if I was sat outside, and would probably leave. Now, I'm always always cold, so I'd be shivering all evening. I also have horrible horrible horrible allergies. And I hate nature and outside. Now, if we were friends, you would know this and most likely not seat me outside. If we were not so close cousins, or I was someone's SO (or plus one) you didn't know, you wouldn't know this and might seat me outside. I would be miserable. (And no, I rarely eat on patios at restaurants, and when I do, I hate it).

You sound fun.

YogaSandy · May 2016

KahluaKoala said:

YogaSandy said:

If tables were assigned, I would be furious if I was sat outside, and would probably leave. Now, I'm always always cold, so I'd be shivering all evening. I also have horrible horrible horrible allergies. And I hate nature and outside. Now, if we were friends, you would know this and most likely not seat me outside. If we were not so close cousins, or I was someone's SO (or plus one) you didn't know, you wouldn't know this and might seat me outside. I would be miserable. (And no, I rarely eat on patios at restaurants, and when I do, I hate it).

You sound fun.

When you can't breathe and have to close your eyes because they're burning too much,it's very easy to hate it. And yes, I've tried just about every prescription and OTC med available. The current combo makes most days tolerable, but I've wanted to rip my eyes out several days this week. That's being inside.

OurWildKingdom · May 2016

YogaSandy said:

KahluaKoala said:

YogaSandy said:

If tables were assigned, I would be furious if I was sat outside, and would probably leave. Now, I'm always always cold, so I'd be shivering all evening. I also have horrible horrible horrible allergies. And I hate nature and outside. Now, if we were friends, you would know this and most likely not seat me outside. If we were not so close cousins, or I was someone's SO (or plus one) you didn't know, you wouldn't know this and might seat me outside. I would be miserable. (And no, I rarely eat on patios at restaurants, and when I do, I hate it).

You sound fun.

When you can't breathe and have to close your eyes because they're burning too much,it's very easy to hate it. And yes, I've tried just about every prescription and OTC med available. The current combo makes most days tolerable, but I've wanted to rip my eyes out several days this week. That's being inside.

I can relate. Fortunately I've been spared such extreme symptoms, but my Mom and my brother both have terrible allergies. Before she retired, my Mom had to have a HEPA filter in her office because she was sensitive to, of all things, copy and printer paper. Poor woman.

AddieCake · May 2016

Take it from someone who did the some inside and some outside seating: don't.

Table Numbers w/ Somewhat Separated Spaces

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