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Sigh.

redoryxredoryx member
First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
edited May 2016 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Invitation came for family wedding. There's an over 3 hour gap. 

We (by that, I mean and my 2+ year boyfriend that I live with who was invited "and guest") are local. We will probably not be staying over. Luckily, other relatives are coming in from out of town so we'll have multiple hotel rooms to hang out in, otherwise we'd be stuck attempting to entertain ourselves in a city that isn't our city but isn't close enough to go home for the afternoon.

BRIDES. THIS IS ONE OF THE MANY REASONS YOU DON'T HAVE GAPS. PLAN ACCORDINGLY. 
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Re: Sigh.

  • TyvmTyvm member
    First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    ...I've never been to a wedding with a gap! Sounds exciting.

    NOT.

    k thnx bye

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  • madamerwinmadamerwin member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    redoryx said:
    Invitation came for family wedding. There's an over 3 hour gap. 

    We (by that, I mean and my 2+ year boyfriend that I live with who was invited "and guest") are local. We will probably not be staying over. Luckily, other relatives are coming in from out of town so we'll have multiple hotel rooms to hang out in, otherwise we'd be stuck attempting to entertain ourselves in a city that isn't our city but isn't close enough to go home for the afternoon.

    BRIDES. THIS IS ONE OF THE MANY REASONS YOU DON'T HAVE GAPS. PLAN ACCORDINGLY. 
    The bolded is what every single couple who choose to have a gap fail to take into account. The regular excuse is "Well, they can just go to the hotel to freshen up!" Or "They can check in to the hotel, and then hang out at the bar!" (Both ludicrous reasoning, BTW.)

    Seriously - they know where their guests live, since, you know, invitations have to be addressed. Yet if a guest lives an hour away, they're too close to justify a hotel room, but too far to go home in between.

    AND they didn't bother to learn your BF's name? Lovely.
    BabyFruit Ticker
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  • redoryxredoryx member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    madamerwin said:
    redoryx said:
    Invitation came for family wedding. There's an over 3 hour gap. 

    We (by that, I mean and my 2+ year boyfriend that I live with who was invited "and guest") are local. We will probably not be staying over. Luckily, other relatives are coming in from out of town so we'll have multiple hotel rooms to hang out in, otherwise we'd be stuck attempting to entertain ourselves in a city that isn't our city but isn't close enough to go home for the afternoon.

    BRIDES. THIS IS ONE OF THE MANY REASONS YOU DON'T HAVE GAPS. PLAN ACCORDINGLY. 
    The bolded is what every single couple who choose to have a gap fail to take into account. The regular excuse is "Well, they can just go to the hotel to freshen up!" Or "They can check in to the hotel, and then hang out at the bar!" (Both ludicrous reasoning, BTW.)

    Seriously - they know where their guests live, since, you know, invitations have to be addressed. Yet if a guest lives an hour away, they're too close to justify a hotel room, but too far to go home in between.

    AND they didn't bother to learn your BF's name? Lovely.
    Oh, they know his name. They've met him. Hell, they asked about him at her bridal shower.
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  • madamerwinmadamerwin member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    redoryx said:
    madamerwin said:
    redoryx said:
    Invitation came for family wedding. There's an over 3 hour gap. 

    We (by that, I mean and my 2+ year boyfriend that I live with who was invited "and guest") are local. We will probably not be staying over. Luckily, other relatives are coming in from out of town so we'll have multiple hotel rooms to hang out in, otherwise we'd be stuck attempting to entertain ourselves in a city that isn't our city but isn't close enough to go home for the afternoon.

    BRIDES. THIS IS ONE OF THE MANY REASONS YOU DON'T HAVE GAPS. PLAN ACCORDINGLY. 
    The bolded is what every single couple who choose to have a gap fail to take into account. The regular excuse is "Well, they can just go to the hotel to freshen up!" Or "They can check in to the hotel, and then hang out at the bar!" (Both ludicrous reasoning, BTW.)

    Seriously - they know where their guests live, since, you know, invitations have to be addressed. Yet if a guest lives an hour away, they're too close to justify a hotel room, but too far to go home in between.

    AND they didn't bother to learn your BF's name? Lovely.
    Oh, they know his name. They've met him. Hell, they asked about him at her bridal shower.
    So... Sheer laziness when addressing invitations. Awesome.
    BabyFruit Ticker
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  • ScottishSarahScottishSarah member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    Jen4948 said:
    ScottishSarah said:
    I personally love gaps!

    In particular the way wearing a fancy dress in the wrong environment makes you curiously sticky and sweaty in a way you never thought possible.  

    The 2 hours that feel like a whole day in a crappy sports centre with a pool table being hogged by the kids, a bar still with the grates over it (sad face!) and a vending machine that has inexplicably ran out of the only chips you like, AND has taken your bloody 70p to boot.  

    The supremely uncomfortable conversations you have when you agree to go for a drink with another few guests also in limbo, only to realise their political views would make Trump blush.

    The sheer joy when 30% of the guests turn up late after the gap (as for some reason these lucky bastards found something fun to do) necessitating ANOTHER delay until the Greater Fife Area's Worst Party can get underway, as the bride will not start the first dance or open the crap buffet (made by mad Aunt Janet) (that has sat there since 1pm) until mad Uncle Joe shows up from the pub.

    But it the end the vodka makes everything okay as you drunkenly thank them for the best day ever!
    Sorry for the hijack...but nothing makes Trump blush.
    Sorry what an earth was I thinking!
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  • JediElizabethJediElizabeth member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    ScottishSarah said:
    I personally love gaps!

    In particular the way wearing a fancy dress in the wrong environment makes you curiously sticky and sweaty in a way you never thought possible.  

    The 2 hours that feel like a whole day in a crappy sports centre with a pool table being hogged by the kids, a bar still with the grates over it (sad face!) and a vending machine that has inexplicably ran out of the only chips you like, AND has taken your bloody 70p to boot.  

    The supremely uncomfortable conversations you have when you agree to go for a drink with another few guests also in limbo, only to realise their political views would make Trump blush.

    The sheer joy when 30% of the guests turn up late after the gap (as for some reason these lucky bastards found something fun to do) necessitating ANOTHER delay until the Greater Fife Area's Worst Party can get underway, as the bride will not start the first dance or open the crap buffet (made by mad Aunt Janet) (that has sat there since 1pm) until mad Uncle Joe shows up from the pub.

    But it the end the vodka makes everything okay as you drunkenly thank them for the best day ever!
    Completely tangential, but I'm so embarrassed whenever non-Americans bring up Trump. Most of us don't want him, really! We're trying hard not to let this train wreck happen! 
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  • ernursejernursej member
    First Answer First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
    TrixieJess said:
    ernursej said:
    JediElizabeth said:
    ScottishSarah said:
    I personally love gaps!

    In particular the way wearing a fancy dress in the wrong environment makes you curiously sticky and sweaty in a way you never thought possible.  

    The 2 hours that feel like a whole day in a crappy sports centre with a pool table being hogged by the kids, a bar still with the grates over it (sad face!) and a vending machine that has inexplicably ran out of the only chips you like, AND has taken your bloody 70p to boot.  

    The supremely uncomfortable conversations you have when you agree to go for a drink with another few guests also in limbo, only to realise their political views would make Trump blush.

    The sheer joy when 30% of the guests turn up late after the gap (as for some reason these lucky bastards found something fun to do) necessitating ANOTHER delay until the Greater Fife Area's Worst Party can get underway, as the bride will not start the first dance or open the crap buffet (made by mad Aunt Janet) (that has sat there since 1pm) until mad Uncle Joe shows up from the pub.

    But it the end the vodka makes everything okay as you drunkenly thank them for the best day ever!
    Completely tangential, but I'm so embarrassed whenever non-Americans bring up Trump. Most of us don't want him, really! We're trying hard not to let this train wreck happen! 


    I've never been more interested in an American election as I want to know right away if we should start building our own wall in Canada and offer free flights to Americans that don't 'belong' anymore.

    Free Igloos and Healthcare for everyone!
    Healthcare is no problem, Igloos might need to be negotiated.
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  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    aurianna said:
    Now... I'm a very fiscally conservative, socially moderate, Republican.
    And Trump was never my guy.
    And he wasn't the guy of most of the Republicans I'm friends with.

    I seriously wonder sometimes if there was some sort of conspiracy.
    A conspiracy.. that was perhaps plotted... while people had nothing better to do... waiting around for a gap in a wedding.


    I'm guessing it was more the Trump equivalent to "Hold my Beer"... 

    Heck - even my friends on the other side aren't fans of the two candidates there...  And there's a collective "Who's this Gary Johnson guy who's polling 10+% in the polls?" also taking place...

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  • Penguins1987Penguins1987 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
    I mostly lurk here, and I don't think I've seen this asked. What if the gap is hosted? All of the weddings I have been to in my family had a few hours between, but the parents hosted people at their home with food and beverage between for anyone who wished to go. I'm curious as to what people think about that as an option. 
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited May 2016
    Penguins1987 said:
    I mostly lurk here, and I don't think I've seen this asked. What if the gap is hosted? All of the weddings I have been to in my family had a few hours between, but the parents hosted people at their home with food and beverage between for anyone who wished to go. I'm curious as to what people think about that as an option. 
    It seems as long as the gap is hosted it's tolerable. The key in your example is that the parents' hosting is open to anyone. To make that happen, I'd guess the marrying couple would have to include that information in the general reception information and/or at least on a wedding website. 

    ETA: P.S. Gary Johnson 2016! Even though the Libertarian party won't win this election, the US desperately needs to start moving away from the 2-party system and this just may be the election cycle to spur it. According to the latest Gallup information, only like 28% of adults declare themselves D, 24% R (or something really close to those numbers, sorry). When voting, it goes up to 49% D and 46% R (again, something really close to those numbers) because we don't have any  choices. Gah.  Libertarian party is for the socially liberal, fiscally conservative crowd. 
    ________________________________


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  • banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    I'm also in the "gap is more tolerable when hosted" camp.   I do know that it can be a PITA to deal with hosting a wedding when you're stuck trying to coordinate a limited selection of venues and the church.   But at least when the guests can sit and have a bite to eat it helps. 
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