Chit Chat

What would you do?

edited June 2016 in Chit Chat

Re: What would you do?

  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK
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    I wouldn't go. First of all, to pick a holiday that a lot of people go out of town on a bride would have to assume that some of her guests aren't going to be free. Secondly, IDK where this wedding is, but where I'm at it's going to be at least 100 degrees this weekend so if I'm going to have to be outside there better be somewhere for me to sit and bringing my own chair just seems tacky.

    Your friend is not properly hosting this wedding. 
  • Nopeee.

    I would send a nice card and then sit back and enjoy the holiday weekend.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

  • Certainly the bride/groom have had some mis-steps in how they are planning things, such as guests needing to bring their own chairs.  And, although it is not an etiquette faux pas to have one's wedding on a major holiday weekend, couples who do that also need to understand it could make attending more difficult for their guests.

    It's really up to what you all want to do.  If the inconvenient day, due to lack of parking and perhaps general mayhem at the park, overrides your desire to see this couple getting married, then RSVP your regrets.  Or just the long roundtrip drive itself...especially in July 4th weekend traffic.  An invitation is not a summons, though I understand where it can be harder to do that with people we care about.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    OurWildKingdomHereForThePartyGK
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs
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    I definitely would not go. 

    HereForThePartyGK
  • It's definitely going to be insanely hot out, and we will have to drive right thru the middle of a large major city to get there....so the 1.5 hours is without traffic....let alone holiday traffic.   
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston
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  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216
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    edited June 2016
    Don't go, but send a card and maybe a small gift, and if you're close, make plans with them for a less busy time.
    SP29HereForThePartyGK
  • atomicblondeatomicblonde The Shire
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    My gut says that if you have to ask a bunch of strangers what they'd do, then you kind of already know what you what you want to do.  I would decline, and if they're close friends, send a card and maybe a gift. The only invitation I'd be disinclined to reply "No" to would be a subpoena.


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    OurWildKingdomgeebee908
  • Very good point.   I think it's hardest because it's family.  But once I saw the festival thing, that's what really had me considering the decline.  It's going to be a carnival, in the same exact park where the wedding is....those things can get expensive and I really don't want to spend that much $....and to make my kids sit in a hot park, right next to a carnival without letting them go to it, well, that's just kinda bad manners on my part as a parent lol for lack of a better word.  
    OurWildKingdom
  • OP did you delete your post?  I gather it's outdoors over July 4th weekend?  I'm not a fan of outdoor summer weddings so I'd lean towards no, since I hate the heat.  Unless it was very close friends.  Can't really comment further because I don't know the circumstances.
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK
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    eileenrob said:
    OP did you delete your post?  I gather it's outdoors over July 4th weekend?  I'm not a fan of outdoor summer weddings so I'd lean towards no, since I hate the heat.  Unless it was very close friends.  Can't really comment further because I don't know the circumstances.
    She said that she might have to because she didn't want the bride to see and also asked that no one quote her OP. 

    Basically, the wedding is this weekend, they were asked to bring their own seating, the "invitations" were word of mouth, and this is all going on while there's a festival happening.
    OurWildKingdom
  • It gets better.....I just called the park, there's NO parking.  

    So........
  • Declining and invitation is a perfectly acceptable response; you don't need excuses or explanations. If it's inconvenient for you and your family, just don't go. 

    Sounds like a small, quickly planned event, that logistically might not work for you. There is nothing wrong with that. You don't need these details to justify not attending though. If you want to attend, great, if you don't, that's certainly fine too. 
  • I think I just feel like I need to justify the decline because it's family, and there's always drama when someone doesn't attend something.  


    Honestly, if it were any other weekend....id totally go, I was actually looking forward to it until I realized what weekend it was.   Other than the "bring your own chairs" thing, and the fact that it's probably going to be a standing ceremony, it sounds like it's going to be a nice wedding! My husband is probably still going so I'm looking forward to hearing how the shebang goes down. 


    Oh well, maybe one day she will understand hat this really wasn't the best weekend to hold an event in a public park.....
  • scrunchythiefscrunchythief
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    edited June 2016
    If they ask for a reason, just tell them now wasn't a good time for a last minute trip with the kids.  If that doesn't satisfy them, then I think they're going to try to look for drama no matter what.
    HereForThePartyGKlondinium215
  • There's  a horrible summer cold going around right now and you know kids, they spread sickness like wildfire...Just sayin'
    HereForThePartyGKscrunchythief
  • So...the wedding happened. And I feel like I owe it to you all to share how this shindig went down... So, I didn't go, but I got a text from my husband the moment he got there letting me know his mom was there, I won't bore you with details but we don't talk to his mom for a list of reasons, if he had showed up with me and our girls in tow, we would have immediately left.   
    The bride and groom didn't reserve the space, so there were random people walking around, another wedding, and two quinceniera (sp?) parties going on.  They moved the ceremony around 3 times before they settled on a perfect spot.  The bride was wearing the dress she was supposed to wear for her wedding she was going to have with someone else that she called off less than a year ago (that's a different story) the grooms outfit was more casual than anyone else there.  After the 5 minute standing ceremony, which had mention of Bob Ross in it for some reason, everyone went back to the couple's house for the bbq (I thought it all was going to be at the park, apparently not). 
    Just sounded like nothing was planned, they just showed up with there officiant and winged it.  


    Happy for the happy couple, but thanking Jesus I wasn't there. 
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake
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    Thanks for the update!
    Poor planning is just so frustrating to experience. Winging it is something I can do on vacation, not something I'd do with such an important event. 
    ________________________________


    OurWildKingdomSP29
  • Thanks for the update! Honestly, their wedding sounds exactly like anxiety dreams I had before my own wedding, where the wedding day came and nothing had been planned. Congrats to the couple, but it sounds like you made the right choice to stay home!
    BabyFruit Ticker
    OurWildKingdomSP29
  • Thanks for the update! Honestly, their wedding sounds exactly like anxiety dreams I had before my own wedding, where the wedding day came and nothing had been planned. Congrats to the couple, but it sounds like you made the right choice to stay home!
    Right!! It sounds like an irrational nightmare! The important thing is she is happy, and she got to celebrate with other family and friends :smile:

    I also dropped her a note saying congrats and sorry we couldn't be there, so no harm no foul, gotta keep the peace so Christmas and thanksgiving are less awkward :wink:
    OurWildKingdomSP29
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