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Pre-wedding Parties

Bridal Shower Venue Opinion Needed

Hello,


My friend is set to be married next June and she is going to have the wedding in her parents back yard. From what I understand, she is planning a laid back reception. I have something coming up in the beginning of next year that will take me away from planning so I want to try to get the chunk of it done now.

I am totally not trying to be rude but, my problem is that I don't want her shower to overshadow her wedding. Do you have any ideas as to what you would enjoy as a venue for your shower? I don't think having it at someone's house is an option. I am located in Northern NJ if that helps.

Thank you!
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Re: Bridal Shower Venue Opinion Needed

  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Hello,


    My friend is set to be married next June and she is going to have the wedding in her parents back yard. From what I understand, she is planning a laid back reception. I have something coming up in the beginning of next year that will take me away from planning so I want to try to get the chunk of it done now.

    I am totally not trying to be rude but, my problem is that I don't want her shower to overshadow her wedding. Do you have any ideas as to what you would enjoy as a venue for your shower? I don't think having it at someone's house is an option. I am located in Northern NJ if that helps.

    Thank you!
    If she is having a reception in the yard of her parents, I'm not sure why a home shower is not an option, unless it is the number of guests that creates the issue.  In the Chicago area, home showers are quite typical and lovely.

    Are you hosting this shower alone?  Your budget will determine all the logistics of the shower.  You need to decide how many guests you can accommodate with your budget and then move forward.


    charlotte989875ILoveBeachMusic
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I think you are overthinking this a little.  A shower is typically a small gathering of just women a few weeks/months before the wedding.  It typically lasts only a few hours.    I doubt whatever you plan will overshadow the wedding.

    If a home shower is not an option (I had a home shower I loved it), then just pick a venue that fits your budget.  That could be a fire/church/VFW type hall or a private room at a casual restaurant.  

    There is a lot of middle ground from a backyard to a 4 course lunch at the Ritz.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    AddieCakeILoveBeachMusicSTARMOON44
  • ei34ei34 member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    All but one of the showers (bridal and baby) that I've ever attended have been at restaurants- several courses of food, open bar, assigned table seating.   But I couldn't see how even the fanciest shower would overshadow a laid back, backyard wedding.  The wedding, where the bride walks down the aisle, and she and the groom say their vows...it's a wedding, it's definitely a bigger deal.  Don't worry about planning something that would go with/not overshadow the wedding.  Ditto PPs- establish your budget, then the number of guests that will be invited, and then pick a venue.
    charlotte989875
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Just gather at someone's house. Eat cake. Open gifts. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    InLoveInQueens
  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I have attended many home showers.

    But I have also attended showers at a community hall and restaurant. Perhaps more than what I'd be comfortable spending on a shower, neither was over the top.
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    AddieCake said:
    Just gather at someone's house. Eat cake. Open gifts. 
    Ditto.  

    And host what you can afford.  If you can afford to host twenty people with cake and punch at a non-meal time at your home, do that.  If you want to host 20 people at a tea house with finger sandwiches and champagne floats, then do that.  You are definitely overthinking this. 


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  • AddieCake said:
    Just gather at someone's house. Eat cake. Open gifts. 

    If the OP says a home shower isn't an option I'm inclined to beleive her. My parents have a small home and having 15-20 people over would be a massive burden, if not  uncomfortable for guests. People act like having a home shower is the most low key option but it requires someone in a central location to have a large enough home to host
  • Is a home shower not an option because everyone lives in small apartments, or...? If so, see if you can get a private room at a restaurant. Google "private dining (town, state)" and start poking around.

    Unless you pick a country club or some super swanky restaurant, I highly doubt the shower will overshadow the wedding. Just keep things really simple and don't go balls to the wall with fancy details.

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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    If the host lives in an apartment, is there a community room that can be rented or used there. Some neighborhoods have community rooms or clubhouses that can be rented for a nominal fee.
  • I think a casual restaurant with a party room would be fine if a home shower is not an option. You could also check a local park or small pavilion if the Weather is nice enough (I know the wedding is June but what about the shower? May can be nice enough to be outside).

    I dont think you need to  be worried about "overshadowing" the wedding. Plan something simple in your price range and it will be great. 
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    All good suggestions here- community rooms, halls, park district. You could also, if you need a restaurant, be sure to have an afternoon shower so that you only needs apps and sweets, and not a full meal. Or, try a Friday evening shower with apps and sweets and booze. (TBH, my crowd is starting to prefer Friday night showers as we all rather hate wasting a beautiful Sunday afternoon sitting around watching someone open gifts. Sorrynotsorry.) You could try something fun/different like bowling or whatever. 

    But I know what OP means about overshadowing. A close friend of mine had a low-budget wedding, but her shower (a sit-down luncheon) was thrown by her wealthy aunt. Her shower was a lot nicer than her wedding on every count- food, venue, decor. However, like a PP says, nothing comes close to the event where the bride walks down the aisle and vows are shared. I wouldn't worry. 
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    charlotte989875
  • Are you in Hoboken? There's an upstairs room at Chocopain that could work for an afternoon tea shower. 
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