Yet another rehearsal dinner question

GlamQueenBride · August 2016

We have a relatively large bridal party and all will be invited to the rehearsal dinner, obviously, with their significant others (and in the case of our flower girl and ring bearer, both their parents). In addition, we'd like to invite family to the rehearsal dinner since they're all traveling from out of town. But this makes up a good portion of the guest list. The place we're holding the dinner is a well-known restaurant close to the venue and I'm just wondering if other wedding guests (some from out of town) choose to go there the same night, would it be rude if they see us all there and they weren't invited?

Ideally, we'd host everyone who is from out of town, but it changes the RD guest list from around 35-40 up to 80ish if they all come so we wanted to keep it limited to bridal party and out-of-town family to keep costs manageable. Is this okay?

GlamQueenBride · August 2016

Alternatively, is it rude for us all to have the fancy dinner and then invite everyone else to a "welcome reception" later in our room and serve just pizzas and beer?

SP29 · August 2016

I do not think either option is rude. With the exception of inviting SOs to social events and anyone participating in the rehearsal invited to the RD, and not tiering a single event, no one is entitled to be invited to any event.

As for the RD, it might be awkward if other guests show up at the same restaurant, but not an etiquette faux-pas. WP + OOT family are good circles to stick to. Since your guest list for the RD is fairly large anyway, is there an option to have the meal in a private room or secluded section of the restaurant?

As for the "welcome reception", this is a separate event from your RD, so the guest list does not need to be the same. As long as it is in fact a separate event (different venue, hosted appropriately to the time of the event, and guests are invited to each event separately), it's fine to have different guest lists.

I would liken it to a bridal shower. Not every guest is required to be invited to the bridal shower.

GlamQueenBride · August 2016

Great, thanks! I know, I'm overthinking everything at this point. I appreciate you ladies guiding me. I will check into them giving us a secluded area of the restaurant. There is no other room, but I'll see what they can do.

Yet another rehearsal dinner question

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