Dear Prudence,
Our whole family is very worried about my nephew. He is a terrific 30-year-old who has wanted a home and family since he was at least 10. He finally found the love of his life. The two of them have a lot of fun and adore each other. But she was clear from the beginning that marriage was not her goal, and neither were children. Much to the amazement of the intended bride (I think) and delight of my nephew, she accepted an engagement ring. She also compromised on the location of a house they bought together (groan). When family, friends, and fiancée try to discuss wedding dates and plans with her, she leaves the scene. Now my nephew and her BFF are making the wedding plans. Also, whenever she is around children, she is kind to them but obviously has no intrinsic interest in them. They don’t fascinate her or appeal to her. Apparently, they have talked about children, but she will only go as far as to adopt—no pregnancy for her. This whole thing looks like heartbreak in the making for our beloved nephew. Do you see any way the family can assist without alienating my nephew or making the situation worse? So far, we are all on the sidelines.