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Frustrated: Am I in the wrong?

nk1220nk1220
First Comment
in Wedding Woes
Okay, so my cousin whom I rarely see is throwing a HUGE fit because his children are not invited to my all adult reception.  We are having the reception at a very formal location.  FI and I have decided that we do not want children at our reception since there are only 10 children (all under 5) out of 198 guests!! Our friends do not have kids, and it's just my family.  He already bought his plane tickets and I didn't even send out my invites yet...however, now he is saying since the kids won't be coming, he won't be either.  That's upsetting!!  Am I wrong to not invite children?! We are having a 5 hour open bar and I think it's nerve-racking to watch people drink at a wedding and chase after their kid! UGH!
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Re: Frustrated: Am I in the wrong?

  • Stayc516Stayc516
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think you are right to have your reception they way you want it. Some weddings are child-free as well. I think it's better for children to not be around alcohol anyway. Just call your cousins bluff and say that if he decides not to come because of his children, then he will be missed but you can't just make an exception for just him. If everyone else is ok with it and he wants to act like a fool about it, let him.
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  • 6fsn6fsn member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    You can decide to have an adult only reception.  He can decide not to come.  That's the joy of being American.
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  • blush64blush64 member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    There is nothing wrong with not havnig kids at your reception. Don't try to justify it because you don't have to. It's your choice.

    As PP said, he also can choose not to come.

    As a note, I am having an open bar for about 8 hours and I am having the children from the bridal party. I trust their parents to look after them.
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  • MNNEBrideMNNEBride member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    Decisions have consequences.  You can decide to have an adult only reception/wedding.  One of the consequences of that decision is that your cousin (or anyone else with children) may decide not to attend because of this.  It doesn't mean that one of you is right and the other wrong.
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  • ~~Busy.~~~~Busy.~~ member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    " my cousin whom I rarely see "

    I'm just going to say it:  Why do you even give a shet?  He's being a brat, better for you if he doesn't come.  What kind of aswipe buys tickets before he gets an invite.
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  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Will you miss him?  He sounds like a jerk anyway, demanding what is essentially his own guest list to someone else's wedding.  Tell him you're sorry he can't make it, and repeat with each response from him.
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  • Blue_BirdBlue_Bird member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_frustrated-am-wrong?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:32edae38-c6ff-4225-8478-d36dccb23ab0Post:55d054a3-89ff-4e95-b1d9-804617e011b0">Re: Frustrated: Am I in the wrong?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Will you miss him?  He sounds like a jerk anyway, demanding what is essentially his own guest list to someone else's wedding.  <strong>Tell him you're sorry he can't make it, and repeat with each response from him.</strong>
    Posted by ReturnOfKuus[/QUOTE]


    Sounds about right.  :)
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  • nk1220nk1220
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If I was having children in the bridal party, they would still only be the only one's there.
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  • MinMMinM
    10000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_frustrated-am-wrong?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:32edae38-c6ff-4225-8478-d36dccb23ab0Post:2bfe24d3-785a-4bad-93d9-245fad80d046">Re: Frustrated: Am I in the wrong?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If I was having children in the bridal party, they would still only be the only one's there.
    Posted by nk1220[/QUOTE]

    How is this relevant? He doesn't want to go because his children can't be with him, right? His issue isn't with the number of children in attendance, is it?
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  • nk1220nk1220
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    MinM, someone stated above that they are having the children in their bridal party at their reception...I said that if I was having children in my bridal party, that they would be the only children invited.  His issue is that he won't leave his children with any babysitter, and he feels that his children should be invited to weddings.  However, no children are invited to mine.  
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  • LizziebeeUTLizziebeeUT
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Its rude of him to expect you to change your reception to cater to him.

    If he follows through with his threat and doesn't come, the only one who will regret it is him.
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