Cheesy pick-up lines

OurWildKingdom · August 2016

http://www.pickuplinesgalore.com/cheesy.html

Enjoy!

bleve0821 · August 2016

Teeheehee, "boyfriend material."

Some of these are very creepy, though ("Do you live in a cornfield, because I'm stalking you"). The puns themselves are funny, but if a random stranger said any of that to me, I'd probably only hear the "I'm stalking you" bit.

MissKittyDanger · August 2016

YES! I love these!

Not to sound full of myself, but when I was attending the bar if a guy used a cheesy pick up line I would give him attention. Dude if you have the balls to use that line, I'll at least have a drink with you!!

DrillSergeantCat · August 2016

I only read about 1/4 of those. Some were cute and would probably work on me, some would probably fly right over my head, and some would creep me out.

ShesSoCold · August 2016

MissKittyDanger said:

YES! I love these!

Not to sound full of myself, but when I was attending the bar if a guy used a cheesy pick up line I would give him attention. Dude if you have the balls to use that line, I'll at least have a drink with you!!

My friend does that - uses dumb shit lines and has good conversations. He;s not creepy but it's funny.

His favorite is "how much does a polar bear weigh?"

...

"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Guy".

OurWildKingdom · August 2016

ShesSoCold said:

MissKittyDanger said:

YES! I love these!

Not to sound full of myself, but when I was attending the bar if a guy used a cheesy pick up line I would give him attention. Dude if you have the balls to use that line, I'll at least have a drink with you!!

My friend does that - uses dumb shit lines and has good conversations. He;s not creepy but it's funny.
His favorite is "how much does a polar bear weigh?"
...
"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Guy".

That's cute!

emmaaa · August 2016

ShesSoCold said:

MissKittyDanger said:

YES! I love these!

Not to sound full of myself, but when I was attending the bar if a guy used a cheesy pick up line I would give him attention. Dude if you have the balls to use that line, I'll at least have a drink with you!!

My friend does that - uses dumb shit lines and has good conversations. He;s not creepy but it's funny.
His favorite is "how much does a polar bear weigh?"
...
"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Guy".

Mine and DH's best friend used to be like that. I'm pretty sure that's how he won over his wife.

MissKittyDanger · August 2016

ShesSoCold said:

MissKittyDanger said:

YES! I love these!

Not to sound full of myself, but when I was attending the bar if a guy used a cheesy pick up line I would give him attention. Dude if you have the balls to use that line, I'll at least have a drink with you!!

My friend does that - uses dumb shit lines and has good conversations. He;s not creepy but it's funny.
His favorite is "how much does a polar bear weigh?"
...
"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Guy".

I've heard that before and still giggle! I also love the "dad jokes" so that might be why I love these!!

lovesclimbing · August 2016

Cafeteria guy actually used "Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven" on me while I was getting my salad in college. When I gave him "the look," he tried to laugh it off like he was joking. "Hehe, that's such an old one. Hehehe"

(It didn't work)

CMGragain · August 2016

This is one of the reasons why I didn't frequent bars unless I was already with a date. I got hit on too much. Back in the early '70s, it was "What's your sign?" (Astrology) or "I got some good shit out in the car. Wanna go try it?"
Anyway, I can't drink more than one cocktail or two glasses of wine without being too drunk to think straight.

marissaskisses · October 2016

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

marissaskisses · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

So YOU walked up to him, offered him sex, then said JK it's really my friend wants to sit on your face lol? I'm sorry, but gross pick up lines are gross regardless of which gender is spouting them and that's a gross one.

ShesSoCold · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

So YOU walked up to him, offered him sex, then said JK it's really my friend wants to sit on your face lol? I'm sorry, but gross pick up lines are gross regardless of which gender is spouting them and that's a gross one.

This. If some guy walked up to me and said "I wanna put my dick in yo mouth" I'd be disgusted and offended. This should not be double standard.

marissaskisses · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

So YOU walked up to him, offered him sex, then said JK it's really my friend wants to sit on your face lol? I'm sorry, but gross pick up lines are gross regardless of which gender is spouting them and that's a gross one.

No, I walked up to him and said "Don't take this serious, OK?" then he said "OK" and smiled. I said "I'm just testing something for my friend who doesn't think I can make you smile and I'm clearly married" then showed him my ring. Then I said the pick up line, we talked about my friend for a few minutes, he waved her over, she came over flushed and embarrassed they chatted and she left with his number LOL. Never did he actually believe he was getting laid LOL.

CharmedPam · October 2016

redwoodoriginal · October 2016

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

So YOU walked up to him, offered him sex, then said JK it's really my friend wants to sit on your face lol? I'm sorry, but gross pick up lines are gross regardless of which gender is spouting them and that's a gross one.

No, I walked up to him and said "Don't take this serious, OK?" then he said "OK" and smiled. I said "I'm just testing something for my friend who doesn't think I can make you smile and I'm clearly married" then showed him my ring. Then I said the pick up line, we talked about my friend for a few minutes, he waved her over, she came over flushed and embarrassed they chatted and she left with his number LOL. Never did he actually believe he was getting laid LOL.

Uh... What's the point of the pickup line if you were already talking to him? ".....my friend who doesn't think I can make you smile... so can you smile so she'll stop being shy and come over here?" Easy peasy without a gross pick up line.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

ShesSoCold said:

This. If some guy walked up to me and said "I wanna put my dick in yo mouth" I'd be disgusted and offended. This should not be double standard.

My thoughts exactly!

marissaskisses · October 2016

redwoodoriginal said:

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:

Worlds best pick up line...I have used this numerous times and it has always made a man smile, and it even got my maid of honor some digits on the road trip home from the wedding....but you have to do it correctly!

Walk up to a good looking man wearing a hat (He MUST be wearing a hat)
Tell him "That hat looks very becoming on you".
Look him up and down, look him in the eye, smile while lightly shrugging your shoulders then say...
"Of course, if I were sitting on your head I'd be coming too"

It's raunchy and funny and it works LOL

Of course she got his phone number. She essentially walked up to him and offered sex.

LOL, it wasn't even like that...she was too embarrassed to talk to him and I used the pick up line as a joke on him. He got a good laugh and ended up talking to her when I explained how ridiculously shy she was LOL

So YOU walked up to him, offered him sex, then said JK it's really my friend wants to sit on your face lol? I'm sorry, but gross pick up lines are gross regardless of which gender is spouting them and that's a gross one.

No, I walked up to him and said "Don't take this serious, OK?" then he said "OK" and smiled. I said "I'm just testing something for my friend who doesn't think I can make you smile and I'm clearly married" then showed him my ring. Then I said the pick up line, we talked about my friend for a few minutes, he waved her over, she came over flushed and embarrassed they chatted and she left with his number LOL. Never did he actually believe he was getting laid LOL.

Uh... What's the point of the pickup line if you were already talking to him? ".....my friend who doesn't think I can make you smile... so can you smile so she'll stop being shy and come over here?" Easy peasy without a gross pick up line.

The point was it needed to be a legitimate smile...asking someone to smile is not the same as actually getting them to smile and laugh from saying something funny. It's a conversation starter, that's all any pick up line ever is. Had I just said "smile" I highly doubt it would have gone any further than him smiling and walking away. LOL.
The pick up line isn't for you great no big deal, move on with your day and don't use it. You weren't there and not there the dozens of other times I have made entire rooms of people laugh with the exact same line. It's meant to be funny and anybody with a sense of humor can gather that without getting butthurt about how "offensive" it is or assuming I'm telling the guy I wanna jump his bones.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

marissaskisses said:
The point was it needed to be a legitimate smile...asking someone to smile is not the same as actually getting them to smile and laugh from saying something funny. It's a conversation starter, that's all any pick up line ever is. Had I just said "smile" I highly doubt it would have gone any further than him smiling and walking away. LOL.
The pick up line isn't for you great no big deal, move on with your day and don't use it. You weren't there and not there the dozens of other times I have made entire rooms of people laugh with the exact same line. It's meant to be funny and anybody with a sense of humor can gather that without getting butthurt about how "offensive" it is or assuming I'm telling the guy I wanna jump his bones.

Just so we're clear...you're okay with a guy coming up to you and saying, "Wow that shade of lipstick is very becoming on you. Of course if I were on your mouth, I'd be coming too"?

marissaskisses · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:
The point was it needed to be a legitimate smile...asking someone to smile is not the same as actually getting them to smile and laugh from saying something funny. It's a conversation starter, that's all any pick up line ever is. Had I just said "smile" I highly doubt it would have gone any further than him smiling and walking away. LOL.
The pick up line isn't for you great no big deal, move on with your day and don't use it. You weren't there and not there the dozens of other times I have made entire rooms of people laugh with the exact same line. It's meant to be funny and anybody with a sense of humor can gather that without getting butthurt about how "offensive" it is or assuming I'm telling the guy I wanna jump his bones.

Just so we're clear...you're okay with a guy coming up to you and saying, "Wow that shade of lipstick is very becoming on you. Of course if I were on your mouth, I'd be coming too"?

Yes actually I would laugh. I don't take things that seriously, sorry.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

marissaskisses said:
Yes actually I would laugh. I don't take things that seriously, sorry.

We all have a level of misogynist bullshit we're willing to tolerate. Mine just happens to be pretty low.

marissaskisses · October 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

marissaskisses said:
Yes actually I would laugh. I don't take things that seriously, sorry.

We all have a level of misogynist bullshit we're willing to tolerate. Mine just happens to be pretty low.

I've had a pretty warped sense of humor since I was young. I can dish it right back, so it doesn't phase me. It's just talk, and I've heard world's worse. Now if the guy proceeded to try to stick his stuff in my mouth without it being wanted then we would have a problem.

DrillSergeantCat · October 2016

marissaskisses said:
I've had a pretty warped sense of humor since I was young. I can dish it right back, so it doesn't phase me. It's just talk, and I've heard world's worse. Now if the guy proceeded to try to stick his stuff in my mouth without it being wanted then we would have a problem.

I've got 3 brothers and I'm the only female amongst a bunch of mechanics so I've heard a lot of shit too, but if some dude tried using this line to pick me up, I'd tell him where he could go. That's the difference.

cowgirl8238 · October 2016

Avoiding the whole @Marissaskisses thing...I have a funny story about a pick-up gone wrong...

My Husband and I went out with one of our mutual female friends to go pumpkin picking, and just generally enjoy the fall. On our way back we stopped for lunch. I got a pizza slice and my friend and DH got a hotdog and soda combo (only a $1.50 at Costco). We are all sitting at the table eating when this guy walks up and gets a drink from the vending machine. He looked at my friend, smiled and then got his drink...walks away and checks over his shoulder again, then walks back up to us at the table, smiles, and says..."Your lunch smells like meatloaf" *awkward pause* "but not in a bad way or anything." My friend just looks at him and goes "thanks?" At this point he blushes a bit, gives an awkward smile and just walks away in defeat.

We look at each other and she asks, "was he trying to pick me up?" I suggest by the way he kept looking he might have been, and my DH goes, "Yeah 'cause everyone just loves meatloaf!" I dunno, maybe he wasn't trying to be weird, but seriously it was strange and awkward at best. Gave us a good laugh though.

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