Hello everyone, my wedding is in October and I'm seriously stressing over my parents. My parents are divorced (ten years divorced), bitterly divorced. I love them both but they cannot get along to save their lives, they can be quite immature and not care who's around when they fight. My graduation party from college for example, they were there together for all of ten minutes before they stated arguing, so you can see how I feel about how they will be at my wedding. I know what you may be thinking, "it's your big day, they're your parents they will put it aside for you." Oh, I wish that was true, however as mentioned before my parents tend to get in a mind set where I'm not their primary focus when it comes to arguing with each other. What I mean by that is,I've already asked them to please get along that day for my sake they both reply with "I'll behave if she does, but YOU KNOW I'm not the issue" or my favorite "Just keep an eye on your mother/father, and it'll be fine". I'm not even asking them to be friendly, I just ask that they stand being in the same room together and not cause a scene. This makes my stomach ache just thinking about. This is mine and my fiances big day, why should I have to babysit two over 50 year old adults? To give a little more background, my parents fought literally every night when they were married and they always would put me in the middle, no exaggeration, so I've dealt my whole life being a mediator and dealing with them. All I want is this one day where I don't have to worry about them, however I already find myself worrying about them 10 months before the wedding.
So basically between all of their comments already about the big day and "joke threats" about things they would say to the other during a speech at the wedding my parents are STRESSING ME OUT. Neither of them seem to care when I say that this stresses me out. They both say that they're just joking/venting their feelings. Or another way they take is is they tell me "Oh so you think that your mother/father didn't do anything wrong here? Tell them how you feel not me, I'm not the problem". Honestly they BOTH are the problem because they BOTH are making comments like this, but yet I say that and I get blown off or they call me ungrateful for insinuating that their attitude is an issue.
Does anyone have any advice about divorced parents? My first step is they WILL NOT be seated together at the reception or ceremony. However my question I guess more is how to handle my stress level worrying about what they may do, and how to handle it if something does come up.
Side note: This topic is not meant to come off as snobby towards my parents in any way, I'm just so sick of them ALWAYS fighting and involving me. I just want so bad for this one day to be as perfect as possible without their immature fighting ruining it.