Letting your girls choose their dresses

MattsPenguin · May 2010

I have six bridesmaids. They range from 115 lbs to 300 lbs, and everywhere in between. To be nice I let them choose their dresses. Just have to be Alfred Angelo, cocktail length, chiffon, cobalt blue.

My heaviest bridesmaid (who is currently 7 months pregnant), was freaking out at first, especially resistent buying a custom strapless bra for her G cup boobs. We found some dresses with straps or could add straps easily for her to wear a normal bra.

Now she informs me that she will be a bridesmaid in March of next year and here's the dress for that one:

(It will be in light blue with a champagne sash)

Poor girl! Isn't she loving me now!?! I don't think that the bride was thinking when she chose this. I know I couldn't pull off a dress like this.

Did you let your bridesmaids choose?

aerinpegadrak · May 2010

I just told them to pick any black dress. Looked great, they were all able to set their own budget, and because none of them went through a bridal designer, they might actually wear them again. I wouldn't have done it any other way.

caseyandlizzie · May 2010

I really want mine to pick out their own dresses, but they are being resistant and still want to go dress shopping as a group to pick out dresses. I'm fine with this, but I was hoping for them not to spend the money on a designer bridesmaid dress that chances are they will never wear again. Oh well, I tried.

cschuma2 · May 2010

OP, I did what you did. I went through DB and had my girls choose whichever dress they wanted as long as it was apple red and a longer style. They each chose a different one and they were beautiful. One of my girls chose one on clearance with a broken zipper so it was 29.99 and DB fixed the zipper for free. It's hard to find ANY dress for this cheap! I think this is the perfect balance of having your BMs be comfortable, yet still look traditional which was how the rest of my wedding was.

MattsPenguin · May 2010

I definitely think it's nice to let the girls be comfortable.

Plus, then maybe (hoping and hoping) they could possibly somehow wear it again. Doubtful, but you never know.

Jaytee501 · May 2010

Yes, all 5 chose; Jordan "light mocha" satin & full length. Mine ranged from 100lbs-almost 300lbs! I thought they all looked great in the styles they chose & I loved the overall look

mbcdefg · May 2010

I found three black silk taffetta cocktail dresses at Ann Taylor (strapless, scoop-neck and v-neck) and asked my two BMs if they liked those. MOH picked the v-neck and BM picked the scoop-neck. They both said they were happy and I thought they looked very nice.

And unless you look super-close at the photos, you really can't even tell that they are in two different necklines anyway.

samurai21 · May 2010

I have 8 bridesmaids (ugh, I know. Way too many people) and just told them to go to DB and pick a cocktail or tea length black dress in a non-chiffon fabric.

I mainly did it because when I was in one of my good friends wedding, she chose tea length strapless dresses. While the dress was ok, compared to the rest of her taller and or thinner bridal party, I felt like crap. I'm short, and the tera length made me look even shorter and heavier than I am. I wanted to avoid that feeling with my girls.

nboulanger · May 2010

I sincerely do not care what my attendants wear as long as they aren't naked. They thought I was nuts and actually wrote the guidelines for me: black, something you won't die wearing in the desert in the summer, and cocktail length.

I told them if they want to buy something they will wear again or have been looking for an excuse to buy, cool. And if they want to pick something they know they can resell easily, thats great too.

[Deleted User] · May 2010

I have 6 BM's who all range in size and shape as well. I picked the color and length & fabric and then we went to David's Bridal and they picked the style. They are cotton dresses, very comfortable (the girls have even told me so) and they had 4 different styles to choose from. My one BM even told me she loved her dress and she looks so good in it that her hubby is gonna have to take her out in it so she has an excuse to wear it again...lol. I definitely agree with them being able to choose cut/style bc I know as a BM I would want to be comfortable as well.

annielouise · May 2010

I let my girls choose as well. I just wanted black satin and have the ability to do a sash with it. My mom and MOH went shopping (I'm out of state) and MOH ended up finding a beautiful Bill Levkoff dress...only is was black chiffon, and we wont be able to do a sash. But she absolutely adores the dress, and I'd rather have her in something she loves.

Trishes · May 2010

My bridesmaids also range in weight - I chose three different dresses from Alfred Angelo in three different prices, and let them choose. They actually all chose the same one!

arv266 · May 2010

I feel like the odd "bride" out because I semi chose the dress that all of my BM will wear. We went to DB and picked the style that looked good on everyone (strapless, a-line in Apple Red). Since I am paying for two out of the four BM (my MOH is my daughter and my FDIL is another maid) I didnt feel bad picking the dress that a) i loved and B.) they all looked great in!

Borey*sWifey11 · May 2010

I just took mine all my BM to DB and they all agreed on the same one. It looks great on all of them and is cotton marine blue with pockets so maybe they could wear it again.

fallingsnow · May 2010

Maybe it was just a fluke, but letting my girls pick individual dresses turned out to be harder than having them all wear the same dress!

I originally wanted them all to look different. We spent three shopping trips trying to pick different dresses using the same designer/fabric/color. THREE! With no success whatsoever. As soon as we decided to try looking for one dress that everyone could wear....they found something withing 20 minutes.

Don't understand it myself...but there it is!

depoyles · May 2010

I actually told my 5 BM's that I was going to let them pick out the dress with the guidelines that they had to be the same length, color, and fabric. Two of my BM's are having babies right before the wedding (within two months). I took one of the pregnant BM's to David's today and found a perfect dress that will allow everyone to look nice in it, and I don't have to worry about too much cleavage (it's a church wedding). I'm throwing my one and only "It's My Day" card and they will all be wearing the same style dress.

jogford · May 2010

My bridesmaids live in 5 different states and range in sizes from 10 to 26. So....I went with David's Bridal (though I did offer them to try a different place) and just told them to pick a long dress in victorian lilac.

deborah2121 · May 2010

Yes, I let them choose! I have 9 BM's and they had to get a floor length black dress that was not chiffon. They are all set and ready to go. Yay! I can't imagine even getting them to agree on the same designer. So glad finding dresses is done.

Letting your girls choose their dresses

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