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Wedding Etiquette Forum
kwiksilver
member
Thank You Card Wording
kwiksilver
member
So my aunt gave us a card for our wedding stating that her "gift" to us was letting my *other* aunt and her family use her camper for the weekend. I heard through the grape vine that Aunt A was complaining that it cost her $150 in fuel to take the camper out there, something that I didn't ask her to do. Aunt B is her favourite sister so I wasn't surprised that she offered the camper (Aunt A and her BF brought their motor home for themselves, we paid for the camp site). I had actually offered some alternative accommodations if it was going to be too much hassle for Aunt A to bring both rec vehicles out there. Aunt B is pretty broke so I guess instead of asking her to cover fuel, Aunt A made that our present.
I wasn't really involved in this whole thing, so I was kind of surprised by the note in the card. I don't care that they didn't give us anything, but it would have been less weird had she just given us a card and that was it.
I guess my question is, do I just thank her in the card for what she perceived as a gift? Like "Thanks for bringing out your camper for Aunt B"? I'm feeling salty today for other reasons so I need help with wording LOL. Just want to get the last few thank yous done and sent by the end of this week!
I wasn't really involved in this whole thing, so I was kind of surprised by the note in the card. I don't care that they didn't give us anything, but it would have been less weird had she just given us a card and that was it.
I guess my question is, do I just thank her in the card for what she perceived as a gift? Like "Thanks for bringing out your camper for Aunt B"? I'm feeling salty today for other reasons so I need help with wording LOL. Just want to get the last few thank yous done and sent by the end of this week!
Re: Thank You Card Wording
It was so kind of you to lend your camper to Aunt B so that she could attend our wedding. We were so happy to see you both. Thank you for your lovely card.
Bride
Except her aunt specifically said that was her wedding gift from her. I'm sure if she didn't get a thank you note, people would hear about it!
I'm all for keeping family peace and an extra TY note isn't a big deal, I just don't think it's any different of a situation than a guest that comes and gives a card but no gift; a nice gesture but no need for a TY note.
Like, do I need to even send a TY? It wasn't even really a gift, but since it's a minimal gesture on my part, it's definitely easier to just send one. In *her* perception they gave us a gift, regardless of my feelings on how strange it was. So I will honour her gesture, even though I side-eyed the hell out of it in private. At least I won't seem rude (and she's a blabber mouth so if I don't send one she will definitely inform others that I was ungrateful).
Yep - if she spent her "gift" budget on the camper expenses, I would have much rather just had a nice card of well wishes with no mention of "I would have bought you a gift but...."
Yes precisely!
But it sounds like she wrote out that it's her gift to you so just take the time and write what @CMGragain said.
Now isn't the time to teach auntie about what a gift is supposed to be. Maybe for Christmas you can tell her that her gift is that you've donated to a charity. ;-)
Ha Ha Ha love it "Merry Christmas Aunty, my gift to you is a sizeable donation to the Liberal party" (she would flip, my family is super conservative all the way. They are so jealous that America has Trump and we are "stuck" with a liberal government here)
She'd flip all the more if it was a donation to the NDP, just sayin
This was my first thought as well. Her "gesture" is like donating to a charity, but wanting the recognition of her "good deed".
True. But even I couldn't bring myself to give them $$ (so not impressed with them personally). At least the liberals I can actually get behind
It's like the charity favours debate in reverse
You could also give her a dictionary for Xmas with the definition for "gift" highlighted and a bookmark in that page, lol.
But seriously, I agree with most of the other PPs. Even though it isn't a gift to you and your H, I'd still send a ty note for family accord since SHE seems to think it is a gift. If it hadn't been for her writing something like that in your all's card, it would never have occurred to me to write a TY.
But I like @CMGragain's response, so I'd send her the note.
Incidentally Aunt A just called the other day to tell me that her and BF fiancé just bought a new home and paid for it outright, so they won't have a mortgage (so nice for people who were terribly concerned about gas money 2 weeks ago. And I know that I can't speak to or chose how people spend their money. It just seems ridiculous, considering what a fuss she made to so many people)
Also they got engaged and are planning to get married in August or December. I will start shopping for the nicest card now, and send a cheque to the charity of my choosing as their gift