It looks like FI's mother and sisters wont be coming to the wedding. FMIL is seriously unstable and I have always been uncomfortable with her. She doesn't like me since a couple years ago when I called the police to make her leave my yard after she tried to force her way into my apartment. I then moved back to my parents house bcause I didn't want to live so close to her. She started leaving me nasty voicemails and FB messages. I blocked her from FB and told FI if she didn't stop harassing me I would get a restraining order, so then she stopped.
After things calmed down i was okay with going to her house when invited, only if FI is there though since I refuse to be alone with her, and the baby is not allowed around her without me. I will never like his mother but I know I am stuck with her so I have tried to keep her in the loop as much as possible without giving myself anxiety. I showed her pictures of my dress and of the venue, invited her to the open house at the venue. My parents are paying for all their overnight rooms. She seemed excited about everything, went out and got a dress and had FI show me a pic of it.
Now FI tells me his mother and sister are fighting over a phone bill and he doesn't think either will come to the wedding. I told him I thought that was ridiculous, and he tells me it's not just that and his family will stop talking to him if he marries me because they don't like me because of everything that has happened between his mother and I. And then he tells me he doesn't know if he can go through with the wedding because he doesn't want to lose the rest of his family and we have been fighting alot and he doesn't want to get divorced.
And on top of his family, his groomsmen have still not gotten fitted for their tuxes. I picked a tux shop where the wedding will be in RI, about an hour and a half drive for the guys. Not a bad drive, one of my BMs has done it several times just to visit. FI doesn it twice a week. I understand if they can't do this becasue of their schedules, but in order for me to make other arrangements, such as finding a tux shop in CT, I need to know they have a problem, none of them have said anything. They actually told FI it was okay, but here we are 3 weeks from the wedding and not one of them has been fitted or expressed any concerns. If they told FI "look, I can't get there to be fitted but I really want to be in the wedding, is there anything else I can do" we would figure something out. So I ask FI if he wants me to look up tux shops near them and he says no because he doesn't think it will make any difference, he thinks even if I pick something close to them they still won't do it so he doesn't want me to waste my time looking until he talks to them.
So now I don't know if our wedding is even going to happen. FI said he needs a few days to think about it. Although he did say he wants to be married to me, he doesn't want to leave me, he wants us to be a family..... everything else is just too much for him. And if the wedding does happen FI will probably not have anyone standing up with him and his family will disown him until his mother gets through this phase. She already won't talk to him and he is at her house 4 days a week.