Dear Prudence,
How can I help a college-age relative understand that before he self-publishes another book—he currently has four—he desperately needs to have the manuscripts proofread and edited by someone with high-level grammar skills? The writing is cringeworthy. The theme of the books is notable, but you cannot get through to the theme because you cannot get past the incorrect punctuation, misused words, etc. The books are available for purchase online and other relatives have seen them. We are all proud of what he is doing, but not how he is doing it. I tried sending him an email in which I mentioned that such notable writers as Ernest Hemingway and Tom Wolfe thought it wise to be guided by an editor. My words might as well have been struck with a sharp red pencil.
I have a bachelor’s in journalism and have worked as a newspaper reporter, which he well knows, along with decades spent in the business world. One thing that a journalism professor said to our class was, “Don’t fall in love with your words.” I understand that it is hard to edit yourself. Once you have crafted what you just know is the most superb set of words in the English language, how could you or anyone else find a reason to cut them down or alter them in any way? I tried providing links to online proofreading and editing sites, but I think I might have offended him. I also offered to proofread future manuscripts. His only response was to ask when I plan to buy his most recent book. Do you have any suggestions as to how to help him help himself?
—A Cringing Aunt