Moms and Maids

Mother In Law Dress Color

tthor90tthor90 member
First Anniversary
edited January 2019 in Moms and Maids
My wedding is right around the corner and almost all the details are taken care of. The only thing still up in the air is my future mother-in-law’s dress. My wedding colors are navy and burgundy, the groom and groomsmen in navy and the bridesmaids in burgundy. My mom picked a champagne colored dress about 9 months ago and my MIL loved it and started looking for her dress. She tried on a lot of navy dresses, which I wasnt a fan of becuase it matches the groomsmen. My fiancé talked her into trying on other colors and she bought a grey dress and a navy dress with plans to wear the navy one for a different event. Well, today she told us she is going to wear the navy dress to the wedding. I got upset but my fiancé thinks I'm overreacting. Is it inappropriate for me to be annoyed by this? Any opinion on this would be appreciated. 

Edit: Looks like I hit the bridezilla phase - time to do some reevaluating. Thanks everyone for your input!

Re: Mother In Law Dress Color

  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing Alaska member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    tthor90 said:
    My wedding is right around the corner and almost all the details are taken care of. The only thing still up in the air is my future mother-in-law’s dress. My wedding colors are navy and burgundy, the groom and groomsmen in navy and the bridesmaids in burgundy. My mom picked a champagne colored dress about 9 months ago and my MIL loved it and started looking for her dress. She tried on a lot of navy dresses, which I wasnt a fan of becuase it matches the groomsmen. My fiancé talked her into trying on other colors and she bought a grey dress and a navy dress with plans to wear the navy one for a different event. Well, today she told us she is going to wear the navy dress to the wedding. I got upset but my fiancé thinks I'm overreacting. Is it inappropriate for me to be annoyed by this? Any opinion on this would be appreciated. 
    Yes, it's inappropriate to be annoyed. She can wear whatever she wants. It's pretty common for parents to match the wedding colors. My mom and MiL did at our wedding as well as our grandparents, even though we never said anything about what they should wear. 

    OurWildKingdomcharlotte989875InLoveInQueensSTARMOON44
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    It is inappropriate to be annoyed. It doesn’t matter what she wears. You should apologize to your FMIL and tell her you’re happy she is wearing something she feels beautiful and you can’t wait to see her in the dress at the wedding. 


    image
    ei34
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I think PPs have it covered. You over reacted. You future MIL probably won't even being in pictures with the entire wedding party. I wasn't when I was MOB. Let her wear what she want to wear and feels comfortable wearing, that is the most important thing! 
    ei34short+sassy
  • Yes this is an irrational thing to be angry about.  The only people you have some say in as far as color are the BM and GM. 
  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    You are definitely overreacting. Let her wear whatever she wants. 

  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    I have no idea what color my MIL wore to my wedding.
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    maine7mobMissKittyDanger
  • Sounds like you had a good realization.

    PLEASE don't fret about what anyone wears.   Navy is a neutral.  It's going to be worn by tons of people on your wedding day. 
    Casadenaei34
  • Your relationship with your MIL is way more important than little things like this. Start today letting little things slide. Seriously. Your future happiness is much more likely if you make getting along with your MIL an important priority.
    MairePoppy
  • Yea - if she loves the navy dress, that's what she should wear.  

    More like "Bridal Blinders Phase".  Time was some got uptight about the color the Moms were wearing, now, it's more important that they're comfortable and feel like a million bucks wearing whatever it is they selected.  The only reason to get grumpy would be if she chose a white-white gown in a similar style to your bridal gown, then yea, gloves off crazy FMIL, but even then we'd still say "on her not you!"..  
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    maine7mob
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Good thing you came to realize that you crossed the line of propriety regarding your MIL's dress.
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    The MOB, MOG and grandmothers choose their own outfits, including color, length, style. They do not have to match or complement each other, the wedding party or the decor. The B & G should let them know the time and place of the reception. Adults should be able to figure out how to dress themselves.

    You really overstepped. Tell your FMIL her navy dress is perfect for your wedding.
                       
  • Glad you realized you had overstepped on this issue. The color of FMIL's dress is up to her and not something worth worrying about. 

    Besides, it seems to me that half the MOB/MOG dresses out there are navy blue (I can tell you my MIL wore it to my wedding and my mom wore it to my brother's wedding). You're really limiting someone if you don't let them consider navy!
    image
    MairePoppyshort+sassy
  • I'm going to have to agree with OP. I have been a MOB and will be a MOG in August. I absolutely got my daughter's input on my dress color and chose a color that complemented her colors but didn't match. My son's wedding colors are the same as yours.  I'm looking at dresses in gray and silver because I don't want to match the bridal party. 
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited February 2019
    geri5169 said:
    I'm going to have to agree with OP. I have been a MOB and will be a MOG in August. I absolutely got my daughter's input on my dress color and chose a color that complemented her colors but didn't match. My son's wedding colors are the same as yours.  I'm looking at dresses in gray and silver because I don't want to match the bridal party. 
    I was an MOB, too. Daughter was planning to shop with me but I just happened to be in Macy's and saw a beautiful burgundy cocktail dress and bought it all by myself, just like I buy all of my clothes. I emailed a pic of the dress to daughter, who said 'That is perfect for you, mom.'  My mother wanted a dress shopping experience at David's with my daughter and I. She tried on a bunch of dresses and when she settled on the one she loved, we exclaimed how beautiful she looked in the dress. The MOG lives on the other coast. She went shopping for her MOG dress with her daughter and described her choice to my daughter who said, 'It sounds perfect.' I went shopping with my daughter for her wedding dress. When she found 'the dress' I told her how amazing she looked in it. That's how these conversations should go. 

    The OP tried to shoot down the choice her FMIL loved, so she ended up with two dresses. In the end she's going to wear her first choice, but it's leaving a bitter taste in the bride's mouth. It didn't have to be that way. Mothers should not be treated like wedding accessories that are color coordinated.


                       
    MesmrEweshort+sassy
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