Go home for Memorial Day?

Re: Go home for Memorial Day?

• charlotte989875 member

  

  April 2019 edited April 2019

  Go for the weekend that gives you the most time with them (like Memorial Day) and send your Mom and Dad letters on their respective days telling them how much they mean to you. They’ll understand you can’t travel for both holidays and you love them both. It’s hard but it’s part of growing up.  

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• banana468 member

  

  April 2019

  Yup.   Plan based on the best timing and not Hallmark. 
  
  Also, something smells off here.   She's 22 and the oldest and already two siblings are estranged from parents?    There's something that smells like 3 day old pickled herring here. 

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• Casadena member

  

  April 2019

  I agree with banana - it is super weird that 2 under 22 year old brothers no longer speak to their parents. 

  Go on the weekend that's most convenient for you and can maximize your time.  Celebrate both mother and fathers day however you usually do (cards, small gifts, whatever). 
  

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• drunkenwitch member

  

  April 2019

  I really want to hear from the brothers, something is very wrong in this family.

  

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• short+sassy member

  

  April 2019

  One visit on Memorial Day does sound like a perfect compromise.  If she still wants it to be a surprise for her mom, she could coordinate that with her dad.  But I strongly frown upon just showing up at their door with "Surprise!"  A lot of people would hate drop-in overnight guests, myself included, even with close family members.  Or they might already have plans for some/all that time.
  
  My mom kinda did that to me a few weeks ago.  Her and her H drove cross country, primarily to visit my grandmother in OH and bring her more of her stuff.  She used to live with them in CA, but was moved to a nursing home near my aunt a few months ago.  At any rate, their journey took them through Baton Rouge, so my mom called to see if I could meet them for a meal on their way through.  Except she gave me less than two weeks notice and I already had my trip to Panama City booked.
  
  Originally, I was just barely going to make it because they were going through on the Monday I was back.  Though I was privately annoyed to be driving for 6 hours on Sun. and then a 4-hour r/t on Monday.  And, had I been given more notice, I would have booked the PC trip on a different weekend.
  
  But then, even that plan went awry.  They left San Antonio two days early and went through BR while I was still going to be in PC.  And it was just such a bummer because it might only be 2-3 weekends a year I couldn't have made a half-day trip to see my mom in BR.  But THAT was one of them.  Oh well.
  

  

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• banana468 member

  

  April 2019

  short+sassy said:

  One visit on Memorial Day does sound like a perfect compromise.  If she still wants it to be a surprise for her mom, she could coordinate that with her dad.  But I strongly frown upon just showing up at their door with "Surprise!"  A lot of people would hate drop-in overnight guests, myself included, even with close family members.  Or they might already have plans for some/all that time.
  
  My mom kinda did that to me a few weeks ago.  Her and her H drove cross country, primarily to visit my grandmother in OH and bring her more of her stuff.  She used to live with them in CA, but was moved to a nursing home near my aunt a few months ago.  At any rate, their journey took them through Baton Rouge, so my mom called to see if I could meet them for a meal on their way through.  Except she gave me less than two weeks notice and I already had my trip to Panama City booked.
  
  Originally, I was just barely going to make it because they were going through on the Monday I was back.  Though I was privately annoyed to be driving for 6 hours on Sun. and then a 4-hour r/t on Monday.  And, had I been given more notice, I would have booked the PC trip on a different weekend.
  
  But then, even that plan went awry.  They left San Antonio two days early and went through BR while I was still going to be in PC.  And it was just such a bummer because it might only be 2-3 weekends a year I couldn't have made a half-day trip to see my mom in BR.  But THAT was one of them.  Oh well.
  

  You do bring up an excellent point.   I don't want someone to show up unannounced or even on short notice if I'm going to be expected to host.   

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• OurWildKingdom member

  

  April 2019

  I would split the difference and go for Memorial Day weekend (not as a surprise) and send heartfelt letters for Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.

  

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