My friend lives in NYC but is getting married in Poughkeepsie. Should we expect him to set up a shuttle to/from Manhattan? Most of us don’t have cars. He also has guests from out of town flying into JFK and then will need to figure out how to get to Poughkeepsie. Not sure what the etiquette is.
Re: Transportation for guests
A big problem I could see with a shuttle from NYC to Poughkeepsie (and back again) is those cities are about 2 hours away from each other. That would be spendy and, depending on the size of the shuttles, they might need many of them to accommodate all the guests who would want a spot. Because etiquette would dictate that if shuttles are provided, then all guests who want a seat can have one. Plus now you're also talking about the logistics of figuring out guests' flight schedules. And where everyone has to meet in NYC at a particular time/place for the shuttles. Who's staying overnight in Poughkeepsie and who isn't.
As such, my guess would be that your friend is not providing shuttles from NYC to Poughkeepsie. However, I'm not from your all's area. Maybe it is more common in an area where most people don't have cars. But I'd still doubt it, because it is a lot of money and potential logistical nightmares for something that is a nicety, but not an etiquette-necessity.
Just as an example, I've flown to weddings before. I don't expect a shuttle or someone to be picking me up at the airport. Even if the wedding is being held an hour or more away. I rent a car or pay for my own shuttle/taxi/train.
My suggestion would be to see if there are buses/trains between the cities. Or, if someone has a driver's license, some of you can get together and chip in to rent a car.