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Watch what you wish for

short+sassyshort+sassy member
First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
in Wedding Woes
Gotta love the Classic Prudies...

Classic Prudie

A few months ago, in order to spice up our sex lives, I persuaded my wife of four years to try swinging. I searched online and found an ordinary-looking couple I thought would suit us to begin with. We met, had dinner, went to a hotel, and swapped partners. I am a fit, fairly good-looking, well-endowed man. I was surprised and dismayed when the other man, who is older, somewhat overweight, and balding, undressed. He was way larger than me, and for two hours I had to watch him work my wife into multiple fits, screams, and moans. Since this experience (which we have not repeated), I haven’t been able to look at my wife in the same way. I cannot get that night out of my mind. It’s affecting my work and ability to be happy. Sometimes I feel I could just punch my wife in the face. I want a divorce. The few friends I have confided in about this say that I am being unfair, but I cannot see how I could possibly be content in my marriage ever again. Is there a way I can overcome this?


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Re: Watch what you wish for

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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I wish I could advise his wife instead.  With DTMFA.

    But, yeah, LW.  You need to face up that your wife did NOTHING WRONG.  In fact, SHE was the one trying to be GGG with YOUR request.

    Sorry you didn't like the results.  Get over it.  Maybe therapy will help if nothing else is working.  But have you really even tried?

    He seems oddly hung up on the other guy's looks.  It makes me wonder if the other guy had been as good looking as the LW thinks he is, if he would have had an easier time with his feelings.  He seems to think he would, but I doubt it.  I think if the other guy was super hot, then the LW would be obsessing over that.
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    charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    How about talking to your wife instead of fantasizing about punching her?

    I mean I hope she leaves you for being a hypocritical dick, but in the event she doesn’t you need to deal with this because you asked for it and now you’re not appropriately addressing the consequences. 
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    CharmedPamCharmedPam member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Totally a careful what you wish for moment. Like @banana468 said you asked for it

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    banana468banana468 member
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    mrsconn23 said:
    So LW just wanted to cheat and his wife be OK with it vs. an actual open relationship where his wife got something out of it too, hmm?  Dude couldn't see beyond getting some strange himself and thought his wife would just go through the motions.  He never took into account that she'd get some pleasure herself and that she actually might enjoy sex with the other guy, maybe more than she does with him.  

    Fucking moron.  I hope she dumps his ass. 
    Right.   He wanted to cheat and wanted his wife to be sad.   Instead, he saw that he's not as big as he thinks he is (ego AND size) and now both are feeling really small.  

    Congratulations dude.   Way to inflate that balloon.   
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    Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    It had to be all about what egotist LW wanted. He talked his wife into it and is shocked to find out she actually liked it.

    Jerkass (literally). His wife should toss him out on it.
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I read (I think) a Dear Abby a good while back that was similar, though not nearly as bad as this.

    He kept trying to talk his wife into going to a swinger's club.  She was reluctant for awhile, but he finally talked her into it.

    She loved experience, but he didn't care for it.  He didn't want to go again, but now she was trying to talk him into it.  He wasn't anger at or have any rancor against her though.  He was just sorry he'd opened that Pandora's box and was looking for advice.

    In that scenario, I'm actually on the H's side.  They tried something new sexually.  One of them didn't like it, no matter whose idea it was, so they shouldn't do it again.  Though it would always be nice if the person who didn't care for any particular sex act/experience, would be willing to do it once in awhile if their partner really enjoyed it.  Not so much for something they hated, but if it was more a "not their cup of tea" type of dislike.
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