Wedding Etiquette Forum

Rehearsal Dinner needed?

Hi all! This will be a second wedding for me and a third for my FI so we are footing the bill for everything. We will not have a wedding party and my father will be officiating our small ceremony. Do we need to have a rehearsal dinner? Our wedding is less than 60 people comprised of family and close friends who we see on a regular basis. 

Re: Rehearsal Dinner needed?

  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Hi all! This will be a second wedding for me and a third for my FI so we are footing the bill for everything. We will not have a wedding party and my father will be officiating our small ceremony. Do we need to have a rehearsal dinner? Our wedding is less than 60 people comprised of family and close friends who we see on a regular basis. 
    No, they're really not necessary. Especially if you're not having wedding party. 

    charlotte989875runningariel
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    The only time a rehearsal dinner is required is if you're having a rehearsal. It doesn't sound like that's necessary here.

    If you meet up with your father to go over the ceremony a few days before, I'd probably offer to feed him, but it certainly doesn't need to be a big production. 
    short+sassycharlotte989875runningariel
  • I didn't have a rehearsal for my wedding ceremony.  As such, I didn't have a rehearsal dinner.

    Since you all don't have a WP anyway, I wouldn't bother having a rehearsal either.  TBH, I finding it surprising most couples have them, lol.  Nothing wrong with a rehearsal, but they usually aren't necessary unless there is something more complicated/out of the ordinary or maybe if there is a large WP.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Based on what you've written here, it doesn't sound like a rehearsal dinner is necessary. They're really only necessary if you have a rehearsal. 
    runningariel
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I didn't have a rehearsal for my wedding ceremony.  As such, I didn't have a rehearsal dinner.

    Since you all don't have a WP anyway, I wouldn't bother having a rehearsal either.  TBH, I finding it surprising most couples have them, lol.  Nothing wrong with a rehearsal, but they usually aren't necessary unless there is something more complicated/out of the ordinary or maybe if there is a large WP.
    I think people do them more because they want to, not because they're necessary. We had a larger wedding and wanted the opportunity for the more intimate dinner with our nearest and dearest. It wasn't really about practicing walking up and down the aisle.  
    charlotte989875short+sassyrunningariel
  • I didn't have a rehearsal for my wedding ceremony.  As such, I didn't have a rehearsal dinner.

    Since you all don't have a WP anyway, I wouldn't bother having a rehearsal either.  TBH, I finding it surprising most couples have them, lol.  Nothing wrong with a rehearsal, but they usually aren't necessary unless there is something more complicated/out of the ordinary or maybe if there is a large WP.
    I think people do them more because they want to, not because they're necessary. We had a larger wedding and wanted the opportunity for the more intimate dinner with our nearest and dearest. It wasn't really about practicing walking up and down the aisle.  
    I agree, which is a nice and great reason in and of itself.  My H and I got married in my hometown, which was OOT for us.  So it was a great opportunity to see relatives that I normally don't.  The night before my wedding, we had a New Orleans-food themed potluck at my grandma's house.  But it was just an excuse for my immediate family, aunts, and cousins to hang out in the kitchen.  Preparing our dishes and catching up!

    Originally, we weren't planning to do anything.  But my H always likes an excuse to show off his red beans and rice, lol.  They are really good.  It started with his offer to whip up a big batch of that for everyone.  But then it morphed into my mom (loves to cook) and my aunt (lived in Louisiana years ago) also wanting to make their favorite NOLA dishes.  My cousin and I were "helpers" (cut veggies, etc.) and drank wine.  That was more our forte, lol.  

    It's just a bummer that because it's so common to have a rehearsal, people feel like they HAVE to have a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, when it's not really needed.  
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    MyNameIsNotcharlotte989875runningariel
  • Thank you all so much! It's been 18 years (YIKES) since my first wedding and TBH I am feeling like a fish out of water right now. It almost feels like people want to shun you for wanting anything traditional in a second (or third, etc) wedding. 
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