This is a Wedding-Related Question, and I ask for all before responding to please keep your personal opinions about the vaccine to yourself as the vaccine is a non-related topic to this question.
I have a friend who I haven't formally asked to be in my wedding party as a bridesmaid yet, but already knows I plan on asking her. I planned a dress shopping event in my hometown where one of the shops I went to only allowed a 7-person party max (myself being the 7th person in the group) due to COVID requirements. I was advised by my mother to keep my numbers low when dress shopping as there would be a lot of opinions, so I kept it to my family (being my mother, sister, 15 yr old niece, and my sister in law), my future mother in law, and my now maid of honor who flew into town from Seattle to visit for a week. And when my future mother in law couldn't get the time off from work (as she works 2 jobs) and I being super bummed about it before the event took place, I still took my mother's advice and kept my numbers low even when I suggested to her about inviting my mentioned friend (and I had not even asked this friend to come out before discussing this with my mother). And my sister in law and her family are staying with my parents and I due to evacuation from the Caldor fire.
Last Saturday was the day I went dress shopping, and none of us were expecting for me to find a dress that day. And somehow, I excitedly found THE ONE, the dress of my dreams that day. I was so happy, I wanted to privately share the news with a few people, and shared the news with said friend. Rather than to be joyful with me, she asked me who went with me, and took her personal feelings out on me, making me feel sad, and ruining what was supposed to be a special day for me. All because she wasn't invited out, and felt like she wasn't thought of, when she really was. I'm still hurt by this.
I also was being considerate of her when keeping this day to only my family and my maid of honor. Last month, my said friend took her frustrations out on my fiance and I because my fiance had just came down with COVID 72 hours after meeting up with her (symptons didn't show up right away, and my fiance and I wear masks wherever we go). And out of frustration, said she only wanted to be in gatherings with people who are vaccinated as she is pregnant and her husband has chrons, hurting my feelings in the process as she got upset over something we had no control over. To prevent risk, I only kept it to my family and my maid of honor as my maid of honor was the only person who is vaccinated in our group (PSA: THIS IS NOT A DISCUSSION ABOUT GETTING THE VACCINE OR DON'T!). And I wanted to uphold my end of our agreement from that conversation by asking her about future events to see if she would be comfortable in coming out.
I wasn't offended or hurt when she went dress shopping with her family and found her dress. But was disrespected and was hurt in how she reacted to mine, saying that "the way about it doesn't make someone feel good" and that she's really not trying to make this all about her, when it reality, she did.
So AITA for not including her in dress shopping?