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"Before we get started, please introduce yourself and what you want to be called."

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

I wasn’t sure where to go for advice on this, and I always appreciate the scripts you share in your responses. In my job, I often schedule meetings with people whom I haven’t met before, but obviously see their names when setting the meeting up. When they have a name I’m not sure how to pronounce, I always wonder what the proper protocol is? What is a polite way/time to ask for the correct pronunciation? I would hate to mispronounce someone’s name, but I also worry that I will offend them by asking. Secondarily, I worry about coming off as ignorant for not knowing. I’m based in the U.S. but there are obviously many names that are quite common in other countries that most people would automatically be familiar with. Do you know of any sites that might offer pronunciation search functions? Any guidance is appreciated!

— Just Want to Get It Right

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Re: "Before we get started, please introduce yourself and what you want to be called."

  • STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    “Good Morning! Im Katie nice to meet you.”  And either they will introduce themselves or you will follow up with “please let me know the correct pronunciation of your name”
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  • MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
    Tenth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Asking names and preferred pronouns should be more accepted and stated - name and visual of person does not determine what their preference is.
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
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    Do it for yourself, too. Everyone in the US may know how to pronounce Michael, but the US isn't the world. As much as people don't want you to mispronounce their names, they also don't want to mispronounce yours. 
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    LW, does your hand really need to be held for this?  Google "how to pronounce (name)."  The internet, especially YouTube, will be at your service.

    I just tried for my own name common English name (Jennifer) and one of my Indonesian contacts (never heard of it before this job).  Tons of results for both.

    But a practice of everyone introducing themselves is great.  Or most people aren't offended if you ask.

    For more Indonesian fun, their greeting like "Dear" for a letter/e-mail is gender specific.  When they don't know, they tend to use the male version.  It is interesting!  Living my entire life in the Western World it feels like "everybody" knows Jennifer is a girl's name.  They do not, lol. 
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  • MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
    Tenth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    So in the defense of LW - only because my boss encountered this today - it could be a weird situation.

    My boss was talking to someone who requested a call - male names {first and middle} but female voice. Obv my boss didn't say anything and kept neutral pronouns, but ended up being the person is under essentially witness protection and was given male names to keep identity hidden even further.

    Is this always the case? No.

    I also watch someone on TikTok. Their name is female but they identify as non binary. Always good to ask.
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    short+sassy said:
    LW, does your hand really need to be held for this?  Google "how to pronounce (name)."  The internet, especially YouTube, will be at your service.

    I just tried for my own name common English name (Jennifer) and one of my Indonesian contacts (never heard of it before this job).  Tons of results for both.

    But a practice of everyone introducing themselves is great.  Or most people aren't offended if you ask.

    For more Indonesian fun, their greeting like "Dear" for a letter/e-mail is gender specific.  When they don't know, they tend to use the male version.  It is interesting!  Living my entire life in the Western World it feels like "everybody" knows Jennifer is a girl's name.  They do not, lol. 
    Agree with all of this! Google how to pronounce their names. And ask if you’ve mispronounced it after you introduce them. 
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