Weary Wednesday

ei34 · September 2022

I officially feel like by Wednesday, it should be Thursday, each and every week. I'm zonked. Ugh...I also had a morning where everything that could've went wrong, went wrong, to the point that it was almost comical. Lost my s&%t on the kids which I almost never do. I wish they were old enough for cell phones so that I could text them and apologize, but it'll have to wait until after 3. I'm not even PMSing which sends me into the occasional rage, just me losing it. Hope others' hump days are going better than mine.

VarunaTT · September 2022

I apparently typed more than I thought I was and @ei34 posted first!

I just have a standing life rule that I don't really speak to people in the work setting (except about non-work related stuff) until 9 am. I use that time to chat with co-workers, go through email, mail, calendars, etc., things that need to be done, don't take a lot of brain power, and get me into "you are at work" groove. EVERYONE at work knows this. Emergencies are real and can happen and I'll make room for it, but generally nothing is an emergency before 9 am anyway.

I've already had the attorney that works in the satellite office call me. Yeah, I got your 4:00 email yesterday, I'll respond today and don't call me before 9 am for this non-emergency thing. Then my mother texted me at 8:13 am. I am not going to complain to her, I'm giving her grace, I absolutely understand that she is dealing with a lot. She's also irritating me with demands, questions, and expecting responses immediately on her timeline....not mine. I'm just working on handling it, but my poor support network is having to listen to me vent A LOT about it. I mean, she got her headrest on the passenger side of her car all messed up on Sunday. I told her I'd fix it after I unloaded her groceries. Well, we both forgot. yesterday, she texted me to ask if I could text her the instructions to fix it. I'm 10000% sure she's been stewing about that damn headrest the entire time, but don't text me while I'm at work and expect an immediate response while I'm at work for something that is absolutely in no freaking manner an emergency. I sent her a youtube video once I had time.

Anyway, SSDD otherwise. I'm ready for this memorial thing to be over, b/c the stress it's causing my mother is filtering down to me. It's not stress that I would be willing to entertain, b/c as a whole grown ass adult, I don't really give a damn if people don't like the way I plan things...they don't have to come then. My mother doesn't have this manner and she's stressing about all sorts of things.

OH, this is the most funny one: My mother said no one but family could be invited. I told her I was inviting my BFF Tony (from college, knows my father, considers us his 2nd family) and my BFF Justin (basically my local brother) and that I wasn't asking. She's using me as a buffer from dad's family, which is fine, but I'm going to need a buffer from that as well, I'm not married, I don't have kids, and these 2 men are my chosen family. She reluctantly agreed. Tony cannot come (I didn't think he could). So, she was fussing about Justin. I finally just said, "I'll say he's my boyfriend". So she agreed to that. But then she pops up with, "I just don't want the family gossiping about you." Okay folx, I didn't say this, but....I was outed to that side of the family about 2 years ago with K. So....now I'm showing up with a boyfriend? Honey, you think they're not definitely going to be gossiping about me?!

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

And now drop off is bad.
BK lay on the ground crying when M tried to drop her off.

Wtf is going on with her

climbingsingle · September 2022

@VarunaTT Oh man, that is all annoying and frustrating. My mom sounds similar to your mom, honestly. Like, let them talk. Who cares? But I hope the memorial goes well and is drama free for you.

SSDD here. I have a funeral tomorrow for my aunt (she was older and not in good health for a while) so I'm WFH until I have to leave for the service. And then thankfully WFH on Friday too.

CharmedPam · September 2022

Oh no @MissKittyDanger! Maybe something going on at school she’s to shy to tell you about?
@ei34 have some time to stew it over and then apologize. They’ll be fine

@VarunaTT, so silly you have to label someone a boyfriend in order to have support there. How about “he’s my bff and I need him here?”

SSDD for me. Last time match boy and I were together he asked if I wanted kids. I said no. I am honest with my answer and one of the reasons is money. I’m selfish and I know it, but the money I make goes to me.
yesterday he told me he had his kids and I’m like “cool”. And then he said “I have a question that I’ve been thinking about. Is the no kids a firm no or a maybe?”
I told him it’s firm. I couldn’t see having them at my ripe old age even if money wasn’t a factor anymore. I asked “do you want more?” He said he always thought having no kids in a relationship was very shallow and could be miserable. But he could be wrong he also said. I then said “didn’t you say your marriage ended because of constant fighting and personality changes after your kids were born?” And he’s like “yeah. It was miserable”.

So, sure, kids can bring a family together. It can add a lot to your life. But on the other hand, like in his own case, it can break marriages too. I told my friend, if he’s really serious about starting ANOTHER family at 45… probably look for women younger than 43 then? I don’t know many people my age who want to start a family. He also HAS young kids and spends a lot of time with them, and even says they drain his energy. Soooo you really want more at this age? At any rate he used to give me goodnight texts and goodmorning ones and nothing since that text at 10 yesterday. Not sure if I should follow up with him or was that his break up text? It’s kinda confusing. This “dating” thing.

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

@CharmedPam Possibly. She also said last night she only has 1 friend, so I've already sent a note asking about that because she's 4
M did say she looks alone when he picks her up, but there's an after school program that kids who aren't picked up right away go to - so anyone she plays with could be there or a bus kid.

This is so frustrating because she just doesn't talk about it

CharmedPam · September 2022

Oh that’s so sad! Kids can really segragate in groups. But hopefully all she needs is this one friend and maybe that one friend will bring in another and another and another.

beginning of school years are hard.

MyNameIsNot · September 2022

@CharmedPam Kids and dating is hard! I would think that by 40+, people would realize that you'd have had them by now if it was a priority, but I guess not. At least he's bringing it up if it is a deal breaker for him instead of hoping he'll eventually change your mind.

SSDD here, except we're having teaser autumn and it's amazing. It was in the mid-50's for my run this morning and likely won't get much over 80 today. I'm loving this, but I know it won't last. We're going "camping" this weekend and I'd love for it to be cool enough for campfires and hoodies.

STARMOON44 · September 2022

MyNameIsNot said:

@CharmedPam Kids and dating is hard! I would think that by 40+, people would realize that you'd have had them by now if it was a priority, but I guess not. At least he's bringing it up if it is a deal breaker for him instead of hoping he'll eventually change your mind.

SSDD here, except we're having teaser autumn and it's amazing. It was in the mid-50's for my run this morning and likely won't get much over 80 today. I'm loving this, but I know it won't last. We're going "camping" this weekend and I'd love for it to be cool enough for campfires and hoodies.

I mean im 39 I still consider kids an absolute priority. No assumptions either way from me!

banana468 · September 2022

FWIW, my boss didn't start dating his now wife until his late 30s so he was 38 when his son was born. I know another person who was married and divorced twice to the same person and the thought is that he's very angry that they didn't have kids and that he's now in his 40s without them.

charlotte989875 · September 2022

I’m feeling overwhelmed. Part of it is definitely I’m about to get my period but also just so many meeting where people just talk and talk and nothing gets done. I normally can tolerate that more but not now.

Work is about to start major work on the house, H is leaving for Canada to hunt the same time the construction is starting and it’s all too much for nonsense meetings.

ILoveBeachMusic · September 2022

My Dad was almost 41 when I was born and my Mom almost 35 (I'm 61) and I was their first. They had my brother almost 4 years later. They definitely wanted kids. Both had been married previously and had no children so thought they couldn't. They were ecstatic to learn of my pending arrival.

SSSD here today too. Getting the house ready for tomorrow's lunch with a college friend and her husband. They are coming through Indy on their way home from Chicagoland. I haven't seen her in over twenty years or her husband in almost 40! We do exchange Christmas cards and are FB friends. Looking forward to their visit.

I had a metabolism test this morning so didn't eat or drink until noon. I had a raging caffeine headache. It is almost gone so that's good. I have theater tickets with girlfriends tonight. That will be fun!

@MissKittyDanger I would chalk it up to being 4 and wouldn't worry too much about friends and all that.

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

@ILoveBeachMusic I'm trying to, but she seems not super happy about it? Maybe it was just a bad day but the way she was talking it sounded like no one wanted to play and only 1 kid said yes?

ILoveBeachMusic · September 2022

MissKittyDanger said:

@ILoveBeachMusic I'm trying to, but she seems not super happy about it? Maybe it was just a bad day but the way she was talking it sounded like no one wanted to play and only 1 kid said yes?

OK check with the teacher but kids that age are just getting use to playing with others in a cooperative way. I doubt there is any malicious exclusion going on. Probably the kids mean they don't want to play with anyone at the moment. 4 year olds are a strange breed. My 4 year old grandsons have a "friend" their exact age who lives down the street from them. The families have been getting together for Friday night dinners for ages. They still don't really play with him much or vice versa. That has just started to change a little bit the last month or so.

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

BK school update!!

She's apparently very social and interactive - teacher figures she only knows the other girl's name because they have a lot in common and met first at open house.
Teacher is going to work on BK learning other kid's names to help her out.

Apparently today BK had a great day in a muddy puddle. M had to go with a 3rd outfit lol
We're getting photos, I'll post likely tomorrow.

Jen4948 · September 2022

I had an interview for an accounting job yesterday afternoon. The interviewer, who is the company head, told me that in order to proceed with the interviewing process, I have to pass a "technical assessment." If I do, there would be two more interviews, and then she would make a hiring decision. She sent me the technical assessment late in the afternoon yesterday, so I looked at it this morning.

Here are the instructions for the technical assessment:

1 – Review the attached sample tax returns and provide me with:

- A list of errors you find

- A list of items the client should consider for tax planning purposes

2 – Log into the QBO Test Drive Files: https://qbo.intuit.com/redir/testdrive

- Record a Loom (Google add-on) video showing me how you would review the QBO file to determine what cleanup is needed, and what errors the client has made.

- The Loom video should include a screen share and your live profile discussing the financial matters.

There are two sample tax returns. The first one (I've spent almost all day on this) is so chock-full of errors that I had to redo the whole return by hand (not with tax software) to clean it up, and I have not recorded a video or done anything beyond just getting to this point. My dad urged me to do it all, saying, "What have you got to lose?" and "I can't help you if you don't help yourself," but is that asking too much? Would you have gone that far, or keep going?

charlotte989875 · September 2022

Jen4948 said:

I had an interview for an accounting job yesterday afternoon. The interviewer, who is the company head, told me that in order to proceed with the interviewing process, I have to pass a "technical assessment." If I do, there would be two more interviews, and then she would make a hiring decision. She sent me the technical assessment late in the afternoon yesterday, so I looked at it this morning.

Here are the instructions for the technical assessment:

1 – Review the attached sample tax returns and provide me with:
-          A list of errors you find
-          A list of items the client should consider for tax planning purposes
2 – Log into the QBO Test Drive Files: https://qbo.intuit.com/redir/testdrive
-          Record a Loom (Google add-on) video showing me how you would review the QBO file to determine what cleanup is needed, and what errors the client has made.
-          The Loom video should include a screen share and your live profile discussing the financial matters.

There are two sample tax returns. The first one (I've spent almost all day on this) is so chock-full of errors that I had to redo the whole return by hand (not with tax software) to clean it up, and I have not recorded a video or done anything beyond just getting to this point. My dad urged me to do it all, saying, "What have you got to lose?" and "I can't help you if you don't help yourself," but is that asking too much? Would you have gone that far, or keep going?

So technical assessments are definitely a thing in the data world so I don’t find it uncommon but this seems like a lot of work. Is the job a full time role and is the pay/ benefits such that you would accept an offer if they made one? If the answers are no to either of those I might not move forward, although if you need the job you need the job.

I’ve seen a lot of horror stories (more on the creative world) about doing free work or labor for firms so I’d Google the company on Glassdoor and Twitter to make sure they don’t have a reputation for making people do a bunch of free labor without making real offers and if they’re legit, I would be open to doing it.

Jen4948 · September 2022

@charlotte989875, I really don't know at this stage what the pay is, although my impression is that the role is a full-time role. I have the feeling that if I did work for this company I'd probably end up keeping up my job search and jumping ship.

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