It's Fall y'all

missJeanLouise · September 2022

I have nothing to say except it's not too early too get those Christmas jammies. 😉

CharmedPam · September 2022

Ditto! Heat went ON today! Not that I’m complaining. It’s time. Today I wanted to stay home to work from home and switch out my summer bottoms (capris) to winter bottoms (long pants) in my main closet but noooooo, my internet is blocking my laptop! I don’t get internet at home.

correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t phone hotspots supposed to replace internet if it’s down? Why doesn’t my personal or work phone hotspot work? Xfinity says my modem isn’t supported but I have no problems streaming or using the wifi on my phone. I’d hate to buy a new modem if I don’t really need one. It’s just my laptop that’s blocked.

VarunaTT · September 2022

I hit a wall last night. I haven't been taking care of myself the last week and dropped a lot of things I was doing really well. So, as I have reframed my language, I'm restarting from "my last save point" today and trying to get back to feeling better.

Otherwise, SSDD. I've started trying to map out Christmas gifts, speaking of fall. Everyone is talking about Halloween and usually I love that holiday. However, Halloween was also dad's birthday and I just don't think I'm going to feel like celebrating this year. L's birthday is this month and I found a nice gift for him, that I know he will like, but it's not terribly expensive, so hopefully isn't weird for us. We have definitely moved into a friendship, but the spark is still there, so I always kinda feel like I'm walking a weird line; so far seem to be doing it well.

Casadena · September 2022

This morning was slightly better than yesterday for G. He calmed down enough before we left to tell me that he was nervous and didn't like the part where Mommy has to go.

H is not in a good place and I gently suggested he try and see his therapist ASAP this week so I'm hoping that happens because there's not really much more I can do for him.

I'm tired and crabby and definitely a debbie downer today.

CharmedPam · September 2022

That would be a weird line to walk @VarunaTT. Friend zone for now? Maybe something to pop up in the future? And it’s 100% A-OK to not feel festive for the upcoming holiday. I don’t think I would either.

@Casadena, so much on your shoulders right now. Ugh! Here’s hoping H can get the help he needs soon.

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

I was off yesterday with stomach stuff. Every so often it gets bad, but no real thing directly affecting it.
Usually only last a bit, but lasted longer. Couldn't wear pants and bloated to 4m pregnant kinda thing.

It's ok now. I'm wearing leggings today lol

Weekend was a lot. Saturday BK had gymnastics and I did groceries.
Unfortunately we're at the point of fall where it's cold when they leave for gymnastics, but warm by the time they're coming home.
So BK overheated a bit and felt sick. Luckily it passed and nothing happened, but we clearly have to watch out for it more.

Then later we went to head to the park and found a hurt squirrel.
It's back end was probably injured because he kept dragging it. No bites or whatever, so we figured fell and hurt himself.
Had bylaw come pick him up. Poor buddy. I was grateful for a Bluey episode that we could reference - however the bird in the episode they found out didn't make it. We won't find out about the squirrel.

Sunday was lowkey. BK asked to do stuff, and we did cleaning but I really had no energy for anything else.
I put on 2 movies type of no energy.

I got BK the OmieLife box - so she had warm spaghetti on Monday. But damn that box is heavy! I felt bad sending it

MissKittyDanger · September 2022

@VarunaTT I'm sure you're aware, but if not I will remind you.
It is 100% normal to not want to celebrate holidays.
Especially that first year. It's all a mess because you're thinking "last year was different"

Take any holiday easy.

banana468 · September 2022

CharmedPam said:

Ditto! Heat went ON today! Not that I’m complaining. It’s time. Today I wanted to stay home to work from home and switch out my summer bottoms (capris) to winter bottoms (long pants) in my main closet but noooooo, my internet is blocking my laptop! I don’t get internet at home.

correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t phone hotspots supposed to replace internet if it’s down? Why doesn’t my personal or work phone hotspot work? Xfinity says my modem isn’t supported but I have no problems streaming or using the wifi on my phone. I’d hate to buy a new modem if I don’t really need one. It’s just my laptop that’s blocked.

Are you hot spotting your phone and your laptop isn't connecting? Do you have wifi turned off on your phone so you aren't trying to connect to your wifi? When I use my hotspot I have to turn off wifi, turn on my hotspot and then make my laptop find my mobile hotspot name (which is actually BananaPhone).

climbingsingle · September 2022

@CharmedPam I had the same problem trying to connect my laptop to my hotspot on my phone. I have yet to figure it out. So annoying.

It's definitely fall but that doesn't stop my coworkers from turning the AC on! I'm so freaking cold here.

Today is my birthday and N and are I going to dinner tonight at one of my favorite places so I'm ready for it to be time to go home already. And thankfully WFH tomorrow.

Casadena · September 2022

Happy birthday @climbingsingle!

CharmedPam · September 2022

I think I did turn it back to wifi @banana468. I’ll have to try connecting later when it’s off. I have an I.T pro friend coming to my house on the 15th so maybe we can get down to the bottom of it before buying a new modem if I don’t have to. I also want to be able to wfh on snow days that will be here before we know it. But those days I may bug my IT department.

happy birthday @climbingsingle, enjoy your night out

levioosa · September 2022

Happy birthday! @climbingsingle

*hugs* @VarunaTT and @Casadena

I hope you and babe are feeling better today @charlotte989875

It is the opposite of fall here. It’s supposed to be 103 F today. I can’t. Even next week it’s still in the high 80s. I hate climate change.

I slept terribly last night. I don’t work until noon so I’m trying to get the gusto to get up and work out first. H and I had a really fun weekend celebrating our six month anniversary. He was so surprised. I packed everything for him and set up and outfit for him to wear in the closet, then called him when I got to the hotel and had unpacked everything. We were only sad it wasn’t a longer trip as always.

Otherwise, SSDD. Hopefully I don’t overheat in the iso rooms with the broken AC and the plastic iso gowns today.

short+sassy · September 2022

@VarunaTT, I hope you start feeling better emotionally. There was a lot going on this week for you and it's understandable. You're allowed to celebrate as much or as little as you want for Halloween and the upcoming holidays. Give yourself grace.

@Casadena, I hope your H listens to you and gets help from his therapist. I'm sorry to hear he's been suffering from depression.

Even down here it felt like fall for the first time today. When I left this morning, it was actually breezy and dare I say...cool? Just yesterday it was the usual brutal heat and felt like stepping into a sauna. LOVE IT!!!

October through mid-Nov. and March-mid April are the BEST times of year, weather-wise, where I live. That's when the temps range between the high 60s and low 80s. Too bad it's only for 6 weeks here and there, lol. @CharmedPam, still don't need to turn on the heat. That won't happen until sometime in Nov. But just turning off the a/c is a major win.

-------------------------
Long stories of frustration with tenants:

I'm having a mess with my two of my tenants right now and I'm PO'ed and resentful about it. In a nutshell, it's almost the end of the month and both of them have not paid their rent in full yet. Just partial payments.

One of them is a fairly new tenant. They ran into trouble last month also. Paid most of it on the 15th and then the remaining $250 on the 22nd. Their household...which includes three adults (wife/husband and the wife's mother)...make 4x the rent amount. I was told the wife was going back to work in mid-August, so it was only a one-time thing. Except then I got the same song and dance for this month and it's even worse. They paid nothing until Sept. 16th. Then paid $800 and told me the remaining $550 would be paid on the 23rd, except it wasn't. I contacted the wife yesterday and She replied something like, "Oh, that's right, I did tell you we would pay on the 23rd. I thought my check was clearing today (yesterday, which WASN'T Friday), but we can pay the rest this Friday. As in, the last day of the month. And then their rent is due again on Oct. 1st. smh.

I'd bet dollars to doughnuts they were always planning to pay the rest on Sept. 30th. All of this is bullshit and I especially hate being lied to. I haven't responded back yet. Talked to my H about it last night. I'm going to let her know today that we will work with them a little, but we're done with getting no rent until the middle of the month. They need to finish paying September's rent on Friday. They need to pay something for October's rent also. And need to finish paying October, no later than the 14th. The H is the bread winner and I know he gets paid every other Friday, ie 9/30 and 10/14.

-------------------------------------------

My other tenant I have more sympathy for, but am obviously still not happy to be stiffed on some of the rent. She's been my tenant for over 5 years and, overall, has been a pretty good tenant. But she fell behind once before a few years ago and it took her months to catch back up. And she fell behind again last month (sigh).

Unfortunately, her situation is more dire than it was before. Was supposed to pay half a couple weeks ago, but only paid $300. Was supposed to pay the remainder on Friday but, again, only paid $300. Her rent is $850.

When I texted her about it yesterday, I found out she is no longer working at her previous employer. She has a new job, but it doesn't pay as much. And THAT is a red flag. She has a vehicle she is trying to sell and she's trying to get a second job (she's been saying this for years) and all that. But the bottom line is she has shown through her actions that she doesn't make enough to pay the full rent anymore. I also know that, like a lot of people, she's not going to take much action until she is forced to.

I spoke to my H last night and we did come up with a plan. I normally wouldn't do this but, because she has been such a long-time tenant, we are going to give her a little more understanding in the form of time. We are going to give her a 30-Day Notice to Vacate, though she can move out sooner if she wants to with no penalty. Or we will dismiss it, IF she pays the full remaining rent for Sept./Oct/Nov., by 10/31. She still needs to pay at least $600 for October. We aren't forgiving the $250 loss from each of Sept. and Oct., but we'll take it out of her security deposit if she moves out by 10/31.

I also texted her a couple charities I know that have given rental assistance in the past and encouraged her to look for other ones. I also suggested she look into Section 8, but warned her they have a long wait list. She actually sent me a screenshot that she applied! Which is great, that program could help her so much for the future. But there's no way it will help her in time. She also spoke to one of the charities I mentioned and they told her to call back next month for an appointment. Crossing fingers there. And at least she is taking some kind of action.

I realize she still could still be in a lot of trouble by 10/31. But I'm hoping she'll see the writing on the wall with the Notice to Vacate, and start taking more action to help herself so she can continue living there. TBH, I also think she puts her rent on low priority because even though it's obviously to my detriment, I try to be flexible with people when they are (supposedly) in a cash crunch.

Another reason why I want to move my real estate endeavors to short-term rentals! I don't have to deal with the sob stories and the stress of how long it will take to evict someone, if/when the s**t hits the fan. There are "cons" also, but that has been the biggest "con" of doing long-term rentals and I'm very tired of it.

short+sassy · September 2022

@climbingsingle, Happy birthday!

@levioosa, I'm glad you all had a great 6- month anniversary weekend! Your work has been so hectic, you definitely deserved a break.

@MyNameIsNot, I saw they are encouraging people to evacuate many parts of FL. I hope your SIL has decided to leave and is on her way to you all.

ILoveBeachMusic · September 2022

Happy Birthday @climbingsingle!

I got back from my girl's trip to Vancouver. It was great. We saw humpback whales on our watching trip. That was the highlight of the trip for me. We also biked and did lots of walking. We took a seaplane to Victoria and went through the Burkhardt (spelling?) gardens. I traveled all.day.long yesterday. Got up at 3am Vancouver time and got home 11:00pm Indy time. I slept in until 7:40 this morning. Now I'm playing catch up with everything.

This year will be tough for all special events @VarunaTT. Let yourself do things as you feel able.

charlotte989875 · September 2022

You all have been through so much @Casadena; it would be weird if y’all weren’t dealing with some mental health challenges at this point. I hope that he will take your suggestions and talk to someone. There’s no way to get through what you’ve all been through without some support.

charlotte989875 · September 2022

M and I are doing a bit better today. But found out that my boss (who I was at our team offsite Wednesday and Thursday) with just tested positive AND my bff (who M and I saw Sunday) her husband tested positive this morning. Awesome sauce. I was negative Friday and yesterday but looks like I’ll be picking up some more tests again. I hate this all so much.

Thankfully we’ve had a deluge of rain so the contractors didn’t start today but they should be here tomorrow. Yay.

ei34 · September 2022

Sending all the vibes @VarunaTT, this has been a rough stretch for you!
I'm sorry that you're dealing with H on top of everything else @Casadena, I marvel at how strong you've been and you have every right to hope H can help himself a bit now, sending you love
Happy birthday @climbingsingle!
Glad you had an anniversary getaway @levioosa and can't wait until you can have longer time away!

Day 4 of a 4-day weekend for me...I love school holidays that I don't personally celebrate, no familial obligations, elaborate meals to make or mass to attend. (Don't worry, I go back tomorrow, for everyone thinking "damn girl didn't you just have nine weeks off?!".) Kids did okay with stbxh Sat into Sunday. He didn't respond to any of my texts (in my defense, I only sent one on Saturday, a casual "hey, how's it going?" and two on Sunday, a good morning and then a question about his usps mail forward) and didn't pick up my original Saturday evening FT and when the kids called back 45min later he hung up the call when they were mid-sentence after five minutes. Nice. The kids told me they asked to call me a couple times each day and he told them I was busy. So it's a work in progress, but we all survived. I got a lot done and kids and I have had some great fall fun yesterday and today. It's definitely fall weather here and I'm loving the crispness in the air. Lol @CharmedPam I saw that meme and another one that said something like "the temperature went from 80 to 55 like it saw a state trooper"

I do love sweata weatha so it's really felt great.

short+sassy · September 2022

@ei34, I know I don't know you all IRL. But I dislike your stbxh more and more with each example.

Dude, your kids want to talk to their mom. Because that's their mom and they miss her. It doesn't have to be for hours, but 10-20 minutes here and there is for their benefit.

But glad it was a good long weekend, overall.

banana468 · September 2022

All the vibes to you @VarunaTT!

Happy birthday @climbingsingle!

@ei34 it's times like that I wonder if your H is baiting you with the concept that they SHOULD have phones so he can check in on them? On other message boards I see contentious divorces and the kids pick up on them. Kids will see through the BS.

Jen4948 · September 2022

Happy birthday @climbingsingle

Quiet for me. Rosh Hashanah was yesterday and today. I skipped services today which I am not proud of but I was feeling burned out.

MyNameIsNot · September 2022

short+sassy said:

@MyNameIsNot, I saw they are encouraging people to evacuate many parts of FL. I hope your SIL has decided to leave and is on her way to you all.

I actually went into the office and stayed there all day today. It was weird and I'm just now checking in.

SIL is pretty far west and looks to be out of the zone now that Ian is turning, so I think they'll probably stay put. My direct manager is in the Tampa area. Apparently it's a shitshow there now. This looks like it might be an ugly one.

ei34 · September 2022

@banana468 oh it's 80% he's trying to make the case for them having phones or at least those gizmo watches...20% wanted to be obnoxious

banana468 · September 2022

ei34 said:

@banana468 oh it's 80% he's trying to make the case for them having phones or at least those gizmo watches...20% wanted to be obnoxious

That's what I figured. "Oh if they had their own gadgets you could call them yourself. It would be SO much easier."

But of course I assume that it would be YOUR cost and he'd still tell them to keep the calls short when he had them.

missJeanLouise · September 2022

ei34 said:

@banana468 oh it's 80% he's trying to make the case for them having phones or at least those gizmo watches...20% wanted to be obnoxious

I had to look up a Gizmo watch and I would not be comfortable at all with him being able to track their (and therefore my) location. This would be an easy No for me.

ei34 · September 2022

@banana468 exactly. Biggest thing is he's forgetting I'm from a first responder family, there were plenty of times I didn't talk to my dad in a 24hr+ period...and our kids experienced that too, their first few years. We don't have to be in touch constantly, a 5-10min daily call (doesn't have to be FT) on each end is nice but not at the point that the kids would need phones. I took issue with the kids telling me they were asking to call me and him declining them that...if they get into a flow at his place and don't ask to call me, they don't have to

@missJeanLouise yeah he liked the location piece and tried to make that argument but I shut it down. They're young enough that I always know where they are. He has their schedules (thanks to me) and also knows where they are, not that he bothers to keep up. Look, when they're teens and have smart phones, I'll be tempted to track their location. Will I? I don't think so...maybe on a case by case basis, if one of them gives me a reason not to trust them. But at their current ages? If they're anywhere but school right this minute we have a problem and it's more than gizmo watches can solve

edit - grammar mistake

It's Fall y'all

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