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Wedding Woes
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Just deal with it

CasadenaCasadena member
Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Woes

My 15-year-old daughter is a really good kid, and I’ve tried to respond to her various experiments with identity in a spirit that’s curious and nonjudgmental, but her latest one has me stumped. Every day, she paints half of her face purple using stage makeup. When this first started a couple of weeks ago I commented that it was an interesting look and asked about it, and she just shrugged and said she liked it. I’ve mentioned it a couple of times since then and she just says it’s not a big deal and acts like I’m weird for asking about it. I’ve been getting questions from other parents about this and I don’t really have anything to tell them. Is this some kind of internet thing that I’m missing? Is she trying to bait me? Her older brother’s wedding is coming up and he and his fiancé think the whole thing is hilarious, but I’d really prefer she not wear it there.


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Re: Just deal with it

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Can you talk to your daughter and ask her about what's going on?  At 15 there's a lot of figuring yourself out but also this makes me think that the makeup is being used as a barrier from having to deal with classmates because she can hide behind it. 

    I'd be far more concerned not with the look but with her mental health. 
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    LW should just let this ride. It's not hurting anyone and she's giving her daughter the opportunity to make her own choice, on something that doesn't really matter.  15-year-olds think anything their parents say/ask is weird.  She knows her make-up choice is unusual.  If other parents ask, tell them the truth.  She likes the way it looks.

    NGL, though,  I would ask the daughter to not wear her make-up that way for the wedding, so that her face shows more clearly for the pictures.  But, at the same time, I'd only ask once and it is not a hill I would die on if she was upset by the request.

    And then I'd (secretly) laugh 20 years from now, when my 35-year-old daughter cringes at those pictures.
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Looks like your kid found a way to both express something and get under your skin. 

    Just be glad it's makeup and not a tattoo and leave it alone. She's not hurting anyone. 
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