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Wedding Woes

Fri-yay

Good afternoon! (I woke up at 3:30 for what I thought was a quick bathroom trip but couldn't get back to sleep, so after five hours awake I'm calling this afternoon lol.)  Stbxh finally got back to me and told me he isn't taking the kids this weekend.  I'd signed up to chaperone some events at my school tomorrow afternoon and evening back in Sept bc it was his weekend...I can actually bring the kids to them but I don't know how much they'd enjoy, so trying to re-work my weekend.  Vent aside, I'm happy the weekend is upon us.  It was in the 20s this morning (but going up to 40), there's something so invigorating about cool air.

Doing a big shop for Thanksgiving this evening, and a lot of baking planned for Sunday.

@Casadena and @banana468 how are the kids?  @levioosa hope the antibiotic has kicked in!  Who else is unwell?  I can;t even keep track anymore but healing vibes to all 

Re: Fri-yay

  • We got about 2 feet of snow over night and more on the way. The weather app says we can expect 29
    more inches in the next 24 hours so we’ll see. We’ve already been out to play once with M.  Schools and daycare are closed and we’re attempting to WFH with him. Fun fun! 
  • @ei34, at least he replied back.  Small improvement.  Did he also answer your question about Thanksgiving?

    Boring errands to run after work.  Supposedly my H's friends got us free Eagles tickets for tomorrow, but I haven't heard anything else about it and almost forgot.  I just sent H a text.  My birthday is Sunday ((waves happy birthday to @kerbohl)) but I've become such a fuddy-duddy in my "old age", that my favorite birthday plan is to just lie around the house and drink mimosas, lol.

    I have a rare return for Amazon.  I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I can take it to any Whole Foods and they will do it for me.  It needs to be in the original packing, but I don't need the box or any other shipping materials.
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  • @charlotte989875 That's a lot!  We got nowhere near as much as you across the border.  We got maybe half a foot.  But it is still snowing today, and apparently today is the day we are getting lots.

    @ei34 Has he taken them for any weekends yet?  It seems every time it is his weekend you are saying that he didn't get back to you or declined.  Is he not taking them for Thanksgiving then?  He's a crappy father.  Sorry, don't mean to be rude and all, I know he is the father of your children, but there is no way they don't know at this point that their dad isn't making them a priority.  

  • Thanks for asking @ei34!  N is good, still a runny nose but I think that's just par for the course when you're 17 months old and in daycare. G was finally able to start his remission maintenance phase and H said that he did super well at his appointment yesterday.  Poor kid had chemo, a lumbar puncture, and had to start a 5 day steroid course too, so he basically slept all day and is a roid ragey monster this morning.  BUT we only have to do that every 3 months, which feels amazing. 

    My parents are visiting this weekend and I'm super excited! They usually come ~once a month but it's been almost 2 this time.  We're planning to head to their house (assuming everyone is feeling ok) on Tue or Wed for a long weekend next week too. It will be the first time we've been overnight away from our house since Dec 2021.  VERY excited and hope the boys do ok sleeping. 

    @ei34 I'm so sorry about exh being such a dick about the kids - glad they have a loving and supportive parent like you that they can rely on!

    @short+sassy I LOVE the amazon returns at whole foods/kohls, etc. There's a kohls like 3 minutes from my house and it's so convenient!

    @charlotte989875 enjoy the snow!  We had just enough for G to make a snowman a couple days ago - its still standing but none of the snow stuck.  We're looking forward to the first big one :)  
  • kerbohl said:
    @charlotte989875 That's a lot!  We got nowhere near as much as you across the border.  We got maybe half a foot.  But it is still snowing today, and apparently today is the day we are getting lots.

    @ei34 Has he taken them for any weekends yet?  It seems every time it is his weekend you are saying that he didn't get back to you or declined.  Is he not taking them for Thanksgiving then?  He's a crappy father.  Sorry, don't mean to be rude and all, I know he is the father of your children, but there is no way they don't know at this point that their dad isn't making them a priority.  
    We live right in the path of the lake effect snow so we generally get far more than anyone else. We have friends that live 10 minutes east of us that only have about 8 inches. It’s wild how much variation there is!
  • I have pink eye. BK has a clogged tear duct.
    And I might have strep? I have no voice and my throat is red a.f. I'm going to clinic tonight, so even if it's not strep I'm hoping they can give me something because this is awful.
    Obv covid negative - I checked.
  • ugh @MissKittyDanger I hope you get some help with it soon!  Sucks to feel that sick. 
  • Casadena said:

    @ei34 I'm so sorry about exh being such a dick about the kids - glad they have a loving and supportive parent like you that they can rely on!

    @short+sassy I LOVE the amazon returns at whole foods/kohls, etc. There's a kohls like 3 minutes from my house and it's so convenient!

    @charlotte989875 enjoy the snow!  We had just enough for G to make a snowman a couple days ago - its still standing but none of the snow stuck.  We're looking forward to the first big one :)  
    Kohls is one of those stores that sounds like it's really common in other places, but it isn't where I live.

    The closest one is in a suburb about 40 minutes away and even that store has only been around for a few years.

    That same suburb city got the first Aldi's in Louisiana about a year ago.  I've always heard about Aldi's, but have never seen one.  Still haven't, lol.  I'm almost never in that city.
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  • @Casadena I've evaded plagues through my house so much, when it hits me it's awful *sigh*
  • Thanks @ei34. I’m feeling like 80% better from the UTI. I’m scared that an unpleasant effect from two rounds of antibiotics is starting to occur so I’ve been upping my probiotics a bit which seems to be helping. This year has been the pits health wise. 

    I pulled a covert mission and got to work early to “steal” the mini fridge that was in my temporary office. It used to belong to a doctor who retired and left it. I’ve been using that office for the four months since he left. Two days ago a new doctor started and for some reason security opened up my office for him to use instead of the other open office that was free. Well not to be rude but I know the place will get a doctor a fridge if they ask for one. They’re not going to get me one. So I came early this morning and moved it to my new office. I did ask admin first and they were like sure, why not. I just didn’t want to leave it longer and create any unnecessary drama or hard feelings. 

    Also had an annoying meeting with my manager yesterday where they called me in like a kid to the principle’s office because they said “they had heard communication circulating” that I was unhappy about the new schedule. I don’t know where they got that from,  I haven’t talked to anyone. I told them directly I was disappointed but willing to accommodate in a meeting we had two days before that. So I had to reiterate what I already said and I called them out on the multiple discussions we had had about the original plan. And I tactfully called them out for changing my schedule so many times. I’m not making a stink, I was calm and I wasn’t upset. I basically thanked them for moving me to three twelves (which was always part of my original hiring) but asked that they remember that I have also been very accommodating to their schedule and requests. My schedule has literally changed six times in four months. I’m not being dramatic when I ask for consistency, and when I bring up that the plan now is not the plan that was discussed several times prior. There were definitely some blatant lies thrown in on their part that apparently I’m supposed to be too stupid to see through. It’s just annoying. I asked another coworker (who was there for the original meeting where I off handedly mentioned I had hoped for schedule X as had been previously discussed but I was willing to accommodate schedule Y that they were proposing) and she said I didn’t come off aggressive or upset at all. They also pulled her in to do the same thing after me so I think it’s just office politics. One of my biggest pet peeves is disorganization and unnecessary office politics. So just ugh. 

    Otherwise I am happy for the weekend. Trying to decide what day to visit my parents. Might do a little Friendsgiving with SIL and her H. 


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  • @levioosa, yeah get that mini fridge!  IMHO, it became yours when the other doctor left it in that office and that became your office, even if it was just temporarily.  And the new doctor will get a brand new mini fridge for free, if they want it.  No harm, no foul!

    "By 'communication circling', do you mean how I have literally had this discussion with you on multiple occasions?"  Probably not the level of snark I would actually use, but how much I would want to use if it were me.  I hope they finally get you on a consistent schedule that you are happy with.

    I'm glad to hear you're feeling a lot better.  
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  • VarunaTT said:
    Well, I walked out on my old employer yesterday around 10:30.  I got into another argument with the manager about what work I was going to do (NOT the work on cases that you transferred to another paralegal) and it was ugly.  I don't like who this work place turned me into, just to protect myself, not be bullied, and have boundaries respected.  I just decided that I didn't have to be treated like that anymore or pushed into that ugliness anymore and I clocked off and left.  I had already cleaned out everything days ago.  So, I have a little vacation before starting the new job.  Which is nice, since I haven't had PTO since last January, when I got covid, then the manager refused to close the offices when we had a foot of snow, then all of the stuff with dad, then my own health issues....it was just never building up.

    I basically just messaged L and said, "I'm still interested in taking you out.  I also appreciate our friendship.  So, the ball is in your court.  And Mercedes is going to be Ferrari this weekend."

    And now I'm getting ready to play WoW.

    :smiley:
    I'm reminded of the old country song, "Take This Job and Shove It".

    FREEDOM!!!!!

    Enjoy the time off between jobs.  I hope L whisks you away to a romantic dinner.  And may your new job be a positive place where you can be happy, feel secure, and be more yourself ((champagne glass clink)).
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  • @kerbohl oh completely agree.  He was/is a much better father than husband and he's a crappy father so that should shed some light on my filing for divorce. The kids know on some level.  I'm watching for abandonment issues, as is their therapist and their school social workers.  
    @short+sassy his silence becomes the answer.  If he doesn't reply, I get the kids by default on Thanksgiving.  Technically yesterday was his deadline and he didn't mention the holiday in his text, only this weekend.  So I guess they're mine? 

    @MissKittyDanger oh no I'm sorry to hear about your health - feel better soon!  You can't catch a break.  (And...I don't mean to kick you when you're down, but Disney on Ice is coming back to us in early January and tickets start at $40...I mean...three tix plus roundtrip air fair into Laguardia or JFK might be less than the crazy prices you saw by you?)

  • Old school knotties might remember, but it did feel very "keys on the roof!!"  
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited November 2022
    Ew @ei34, just ew.  Did he say why he wasn’t getting the kids, or just a no?
    @levioosa sounds like you handled the discussion well and hopefully they know where you stand
    holy cripes that’s a lot of snow @charlotte989875
    @VarunaTT, glad you set yourself some extra vacation time! Were you supposed to work up till Wednesday anyway?
    @MissKittyDanger, none of that sounds good!

    I had an optomology appt today.  When I got there, she checked me in for ENT and I’m like nooooo this is for my eyelid! I searched united healthcare’s page for optomology and I even told the receptionist what was wrong last week! So I had to go home and call united and ask for their list of Optomologists and have them do the search.  Once I got that back, I noticed the same location was on the list that I called. So I called the right place….They just hooked me up with a docotor specializing in ear nose throat?!!
    I did get in today to see another dermatologist.  Figured an in person visit for a 2nd opinon wouldn’t hurt.  My eyes are terrible and I lost a week already thinking I was getting it looked at today :(. And the list I got from United wasnt that helpful.  One number was downtown Chicago (hell no), one was disconnected and one was closed today.  The other was the location I was at.  It’s a complete mess trying to find help and my lids hurt, they’re itchy and totally ruining my self confidence that I have this.  Why, body, why? 

  • @ei34 M & I were talking about it and we're just holding off for next year. BK is just learning how to pay attention to stuff so we both agreed that maybe it's a sign we shouldn't do it this year. We did consider a small trip but - NY state has Frozen/Encanto specifically - but also we're like "nah let's hold off" lol

    @CharmedPam none of it is.
    Also fuuuck sounds like someone clicked wrong area :( I've done that.

  • @CharmedPam none of it is.
    Also fuuuck sounds like someone clicked wrong area :( I've done that.
    That’s true it’s otolarybologist vs optomology.

    how about we have less specialties starting with O?  Because I’m not a medical expert and finding the right person couldn’t be more aggravating.  I thought the derm I went to said optometrist. So I set up an appt with mine explaining in detail what was wrong.  They had to see me. Of course they did.  It was an insurance claim they could make.  My old boss, who’s daughter is an eye surgeon found out, and said “did he mean optomologist or opthamology” because a vision doctor can’t help me! But it would be nice to get some honesty when I call. 

  • I have pink eye. BK has a clogged tear duct.
    And I might have strep? I have no voice and my throat is red a.f. I'm going to clinic tonight, so even if it's not strep I'm hoping they can give me something because this is awful.
    Obv covid negative - I checked.
    Oh ditto I have zero voice. Urgent care said it was inflammation caused by an upper respiratory virus, negative for strep, and gave me steroids. Hopefully I can talk by Monday!

  • @CharmedPam none of it is.
    Also fuuuck sounds like someone clicked wrong area :( I've done that.
    That’s true it’s otolarybologist vs optomology.

    how about we have less specialties starting with O?  Because I’m not a medical expert and finding the right person couldn’t be more aggravating.  I thought the derm I went to said optometrist. So I set up an appt with mine explaining in detail what was wrong.  They had to see me. Of course they did.  It was an insurance claim they could make.  My old boss, who’s daughter is an eye surgeon found out, and said “did he mean optomologist or opthamology” because a vision doctor can’t help me! But it would be nice to get some honesty when I call. 
    Pam, do you have a primary care or general doctor/PA you see?  They can often offer decent dr recommendations even if you don't need a formal referral. 
  • I have pink eye. BK has a clogged tear duct.
    And I might have strep? I have no voice and my throat is red a.f. I'm going to clinic tonight, so even if it's not strep I'm hoping they can give me something because this is awful.
    Obv covid negative - I checked.
    Oh ditto I have zero voice. Urgent care said it was inflammation caused by an upper respiratory virus, negative for strep, and gave me steroids. Hopefully I can talk by Monday!
    Inflammation due to nasal drip!
    Were you on vocal rest? I was all weekend, and I still sound croaky.
  • @MissKittyDanger yes vocal rest all weekend but I literally couldn’t get a sound out. I can talk a bit today but not  Much 
  • @MissKittyDanger yes vocal rest all weekend but I literally couldn’t get a sound out. I can talk a bit today but not  Much 
    Oh damn! Sounds like me but next level :( 
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