Wedding Woes

Thursday

I'm not @mrsconn23, but I'll at least do this post.

SSDD mostly.  I'm so sleepy.  My sleep schedule has been off lately and I can't quite figure out why.  I just seem to be up later than usual and I'm not sleepy.  I'm working on trying to start a going to bed ritual.  I used to be very good at the, wash face, brush teeth, floss, contact out, sleep.  I've just stopped doing that over the years and I'd like to get back to it.

I was going to go to an open mic night tonight.  It's at a venue I really like and I want to support the company that puts it on, but I don't think I'm going to make it.  I have a load of movies coming up.  The old Mortal Kombat is showing on Friday, then Hedwig and the Angry Inch on Sunday, then Bloodsport!!! on Tuesday (I can't believe anyplace is showing this, it is so old), The Blackening and then Birdcage, all in the next week.  I still have a few new movies I want to see as well and I MUST make it to the new Spiderverse movie.  I adored the first one.

Re: Thursday

  • Hoping the air quality gets better today. Rights now it's at 205, and I'm suffering. My sinuses just straight up hurt. I tried a nasal rinse last night and sadly it did not help. 

    Our pool is open so I'm hoping for some good weather this weekend. And no more smoky air! 
  • Operation sneak in my new office treadmill complete. Now I just have to figure out where to put it. 

    Last day of work for the week for me. Looking forward to the weekend and trying to plan out what to do. I should go over to help my parents. I guess it depends on how I’m feeling and how productive my next few days are. 


    image
  • @VarunaTT, happy movie watching!

    I'm going on a great adventure to the suburbs tomorrow.  I go so rarely it always feels like a major deal even when it is not, lol.  It's also a bit exhausting because I'll "save up" all my suburb things, so it ends up being a bunch of stops.

    But the main reason for this journey is there is a Big Lots location going out of business.  I simply can't pass that up.  Who knows what great deals I could be missing out on!  While I'm out there:
    • Maybe Aldi's.  It's new, we have no others, and I like it.  But it's on the opposite end of this suburb city, so it's iffy I'll have the energy.
    • Nothing Bundt Cake -- BOGO coupon for mini bundlets
    • Honey Baked Ham -- BOGO coupon for sandwiches
    • local Kosher deli -- BOGO coupon for sandwiches.
    • Chipolte to-go for lunch, because my H has been wanting to try some Chicken Adobo thing.
    • Winn-Dixie grocery store -- I do have one of those near me, but I will drive right past one going to Big Lots.
    Phew!  But at least with all my BOGO coupons, we'll be stocked with yummy sandwiches for the weekend.

    I have two fast food mystery shops to do when I get off work.  They're both near my house and the reports are pretty quick.  $20 and free burger/fries for dinner!  Not too shabby.

    Today feels like such a long drag, but that is par for the course.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Hanging in there this week.  DH had PT this morning and I have a haircut tonight.  Yesterday I took 1/2 day PTO and we had lunch with a friend who was driving through and then we both had appointments.

    We also have a preliminary diagnosis of dementia with Lewey Bodies.  Even though we knew this was on the radar, it's jarring to see it on the test results.  He has a few more tests and then back to the Neurologist. 

    We are just trying to process this right now.  My Mom's fiancé had this and so we know a little of what might lay ahead.  It's just a lot right now and we haven't shared this with family and friends yet.  
    image
  • MNNEBride said:
    Hanging in there this week.  DH had PT this morning and I have a haircut tonight.  Yesterday I took 1/2 day PTO and we had lunch with a friend who was driving through and then we both had appointments.

    We also have a preliminary diagnosis of dementia with Lewey Bodies.  Even though we knew this was on the radar, it's jarring to see it on the test results.  He has a few more tests and then back to the Neurologist. 

    We are just trying to process this right now.  My Mom's fiancé had this and so we know a little of what might lay ahead.  It's just a lot right now and we haven't shared this with family and friends yet.  
     <3 
  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    @MNNEBride sending all of the vibes to you both, what a journey it's been for you
    @charlotte989875 enjoy!
    @short+sassy that all sounds fun!
    Air is improved today but still crummy.  My kids compared it to Frozen 2, where there is a thick cloud covering the sky but they know the sky is out there somewhere.  Thankfully it hasn't been too hot bc the windows are all closed and I'm nervous to use the window AC, I keep hearing conflicting things.  But I imagine it'll pass soon.  
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited June 2023
    Oh @MNNEBride my heart goes out to you.  
    Tina Fey & Amy Pohler will be awesome @charlotte989875!
    Have fun shopping @short+sassy

    SSDD
    New show to obsess about:  “The mysterious case of Natalia Grace” - on max or Discovery +, I fought sleep to stay up and watch it last night but sleep won.  I have an ep and 15 minutes left of the second to last one. It's seriously fascinating and really, really upsetting. Such a miscarriage of justice. And super sad, but also so many unanswered questions. It’s good TV! 

  • Oh @MNNEBride I’m so sorry, that’s a lot to take in. Thinking of you all!
  • Heads up to Americans, New York state got hit with the bad smokey air so it's headed down :\  

    Ours is died down and I think the Calabogie fires are slowing - not sure. {Centenial Lake area - that's like 45 - 1hr from me}


    I've been slowly cleaning up everything.
    We have 2 things we need to purchase that won't be cheap but necessary.
    Closet and desk for my room.

    Desk is this:
    Giantex Vanity Set with Flip Top Mirror and Cushioned Stool, Makeup Dressing Table Writing Desk with 2 Drawers & 3 Removable Organizers, Makeup Table Set Easy Assembly, Black : Amazon.ca: Home

    I want it mostly for makeup table but I love that I can fold it up and down. That way if I work from home, I have a spot since I'm on phones a lot.
  • Oh @MNNEBride,  I'm so sorry.  That is a lot.  Thinking of y'all.  ((hugs)) 

    Work is WILD right now.  I have not had a second to breathe in days.  Also, there are things happening that make me wonder if I should start putting some feelers out.  Ugh.  

    I've been in back-to-back meetings all week.  I have one more in a few and then I'm going to take 5 for myself and put Prudie up.  Sorry for the lateness.  

  • @charlotte989875, that's a lot going on!  I love Boston and that sounds like an awesome show.  Hopefully the air is better in Boston than it is in Buffalo.  Yay new contractors.  It would be great if they finish the rest of the renovations lickety-split and you all can get the full use of your house back.  That's really annoying the case with the old contractor was extended to August.

    @MNNEBride, I'm sorry to hear about your H's diagnosis.  That's a lot for you both to handle ((hugs)).
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • VarunaTT said:
    Man, everyone is really going through things lately.  Big hugs all around.

    Sharing good news:  I did get notice of my raise.  It's not all of what I asked for (I asked for $10K), but it's half ($5K).  My direct boss said he was in favor of it, but there were protests that I'd only been here 6 months (I take anything any attorney says w/a grain of salt).  It's still a decent raise (a bit less than $2.50/hour) and it's more than I think I would've gotten if I hadn't had an ask (I think I would've gotten $2K, since that's the difference of what I opened negotiations at and what they offered when I accepted the position).  It's also a big enough bump for me to start hitting my goals easier.
    Still good news and still a good bump up!

    Since their excuse was "it's only been 6 months", does that mean you can request another $5K raise in 6 more months?  That would be your one-year work anniversary.  Seems like the time when employees are normally evaluated for another raise!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • @short+sassy One of the reasons I negotiated so high, was because I found out they don't really do yearly evaluations/raises.  I knew about this sort of thing  at law firms, but I've never worked at one that did it.  The basic philosophy is that the bonuses are so large (they are) that it's more than any annual raise would equate to (and they're basically correct), plus they treate us like shareholders when it comes to the 401K and they just deposit a large lump sum every year.  I didn't know that when I came in or I would've negotiated that base salary larger that I did.  My main worry is that I am a single human and need to make sure that getting no raises won't hurt me in the long run (they do pay for our health insurance entirely).

    I am considering asking for the other half at a year and a half, when I'll have run a trial for them.  That way, the entirety of my skill set will have been shown off and they'll know fully that I'm an asset in every avenue of the firm.
  • I'm so sorry @MNNEBride, I know y'all have a lot to process. Know that we are always here for you to "talk" with when you don't feel as if you can talk to real life people. Hope that makes sense.

    We are rounded up Nana and Papa camp tonight with dinner out to our fave Mexican restaurant. It has been quite a week. Yesterday we went to our AAA baseball team's game. The twins had a great time and lasted until the end of the 6th inning (pretty good for almost 5 year olds). Twin B would've stayed until the end but his brother wanted to leave. We have had some of the behavior problems that twin A has been exhibiting and is therapy for but so far we've survived and everyone has had a good time..He really knows how to push my buttons though. We will miss them but I'm ready for some peace and quiet and my regular exercise routine. 
  • Group thoughts!!

    If we do this, it's not until next year when everything else is done.

    Here's examples of 2 houses. First is my neighbor, other is down the street from me.

    For sale: 9 BANEBERRY CRESCENT, Ottawa, Ontario K2L2Y4 - 1345793 | REALTOR.ca

    For sale: 113 CASTLEFRANK ROAD, Kanata, Ontario K2L2Y1 - 1345622 | REALTOR.ca

    Layout as you see are extremely similar in the open concept kitchen/dining room
    {castlefrank we like better}
    Now as you see both layouts are similar - as obviously so is mine.

    Given an option - would you open up the wall like that, or leave it? {We have a wall instead of open concept}

    This would be ignoring costs because we don't know what it would cost to take down the wall.
  • I'm trying really hard not to let the colors in Baneberry influence my thoughts, but I would do anything to open that space like Castlefrank did.
  • Group thoughts!!

    If we do this, it's not until next year when everything else is done.

    Here's examples of 2 houses. First is my neighbor, other is down the street from me.

    For sale: 9 BANEBERRY CRESCENT, Ottawa, Ontario K2L2Y4 - 1345793 | REALTOR.ca

    For sale: 113 CASTLEFRANK ROAD, Kanata, Ontario K2L2Y1 - 1345622 | REALTOR.ca

    Layout as you see are extremely similar in the open concept kitchen/dining room
    {castlefrank we like better}
    Now as you see both layouts are similar - as obviously so is mine.

    Given an option - would you open up the wall like that, or leave it? {We have a wall instead of open concept}

    This would be ignoring costs because we don't know what it would cost to take down the wall.
    I like the Castlefrank Road open concept better.  Plus, open concept has been more popular in the market for a very long time.

    I know you said not to talk about cost, but I'm going to anyway because I did take down a wall in one of my rental properties, lol.

    If that's a load-bearing wall, don't even think about it.  From my understanding, you'd have to run a new beam in the attic and you're lucky if it costs less than $15K.  It probably isn't, but be aware of the possibility.

    Other than that, taking down the wall is easy and cheap.  The expensive part comes in where now you need to transition the flooring.  Which can often mean replacing part or all of it, so it is a continuous look.

    For the rental property I was talking about, we were replacing the flooring for the living room anyway.  It was an amazing difference!  It had been a small, cramped feeling kitchen.  The living room was okay-sized, nothing special.  But without the wall, it suddenly felt so spacious and light.  Totally different feel.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I’m so sorry @MNNEBride. Sending you guys hugs. 


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  • @MNNEBride take whatever time you require to process. Knowing and hearing are completely different and require different reactions.


    @short+sassy   since it's typically the wall in our area that if people are going to remove it, they will. I'm not fully sure it's load baring {which is why we say ignoring cost because if it is, we know that'd cost more and we're not going that route}
    Depending what it looks like, we may continue with hardwood - we have extra boards from when my uncle did our floors
    Space and light are kind of why I'm leaning towards it - as you see we don't have big kitchens lol
  • @MNNEBride take whatever time you require to process. Knowing and hearing are completely different and require different reactions.


    @short+sassy   since it's typically the wall in our area that if people are going to remove it, they will. I'm not fully sure it's load baring {which is why we say ignoring cost because if it is, we know that'd cost more and we're not going that route}
    Depending what it looks like, we may continue with hardwood - we have extra boards from when my uncle did our floors
    Space and light are kind of why I'm leaning towards it - as you see we don't have big kitchens lol
    It's all in the eyes of the beholder!

    Even the Baneberry Crescent kitchen is light years better than mine, lol.  My kitchen is its own room.  No kitchen island with any kind of opening to anything else.  Hardly any counter space.  About 20% less cabinet space, which isn't even counting the cabinet space in the island.

    I'd feel like I wouldn't even use all the space in a kitchen that size, lol.

    Some of the houses I've been looking at in the Ocala area have kitchens about that size.  Though most of them are larger.  Either way, a bigger kitchen is one of the things I'm especially looking forward to!

    Here's my pet peeve on larger houses and kitchens.  Every once in a while I'll see a larger house (2000+ sq ft), with a tiny kitchen.  Who does that!  Kitchens are a key factor for most buyers and they sell houses, when they're good.

    I remember one house I saw in person, here in NOLA.  It was about 2500 sq ft.  4bed/3ba.  The entire first floor was the living room, dining room, one bathroom, and kitchen.  All the bedrooms were upstairs.  So much room!  The living room was an enormous open space.  The dining room was on the other side of the floor and about the same size.  It would really be a dining room for only half or less and then  extra space for other things.

    But the kitchen.  Yikes, smh!  It was a small galley kitchen.  Not much bigger than what you find in a typical apartment.  Unfortunately, the layout...and the load bearing elements...would have made it difficult to expand the kitchen out, without it looking weird and broken up.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • @MNNEBride take whatever time you require to process. Knowing and hearing are completely different and require different reactions.


    @short+sassy   since it's typically the wall in our area that if people are going to remove it, they will. I'm not fully sure it's load baring {which is why we say ignoring cost because if it is, we know that'd cost more and we're not going that route}
    Depending what it looks like, we may continue with hardwood - we have extra boards from when my uncle did our floors
    Space and light are kind of why I'm leaning towards it - as you see we don't have big kitchens lol
    It's all in the eyes of the beholder!

    Even the Baneberry Crescent kitchen is light years better than mine, lol.  My kitchen is its own room.  No kitchen island with any kind of opening to anything else.  Hardly any counter space.  About 20% less cabinet space, which isn't even counting the cabinet space in the island.

    I'd feel like I wouldn't even use all the space in a kitchen that size, lol.

    Some of the houses I've been looking at in the Ocala area have kitchens about that size.  Though most of them are larger.  Either way, a bigger kitchen is one of the things I'm especially looking forward to!

    Here's my pet peeve on larger houses and kitchens.  Every once in a while I'll see a larger house (2000+ sq ft), with a tiny kitchen.  Who does that!  Kitchens are a key factor for most buyers and they sell houses, when they're good.

    I remember one house I saw in person, here in NOLA.  It was about 2500 sq ft.  4bed/3ba.  The entire first floor was the living room, dining room, one bathroom, and kitchen.  All the bedrooms were upstairs.  So much room!  The living room was an enormous open space.  The dining room was on the other side of the floor and about the same size.  It would really be a dining room for only half or less and then  extra space for other things.

    But the kitchen.  Yikes, smh!  It was a small galley kitchen.  Not much bigger than what you find in a typical apartment.  Unfortunately, the layout...and the load bearing elements...would have made it difficult to expand the kitchen out, without it looking weird and broken up.
    Problem with ours is that there is little to no counter space, so everything feels cluttered.
    {Spoiler - we're on baneberry lol}

    I think assuming that wall isn't load baring - I'll be pushing to remove it. I know when we paint, it'll seem brighter but also that wall out should bring in light.
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