Wedding in one country, reception in another?

Re: Wedding in one country, reception in another?

• banana468 member

  

  June 2023

  Could you do a party where most of your relatives are that celebrates your wedding? 
  
  Is there a church of your FI's faith possibly somewhere near your family where you could be married? 

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• ILoveBeachMusic member

  

  July 2023

  If most of your friends are scattered across the US, it wouldn't be that big of an ask for them to attend a wedding in Canada. If your family can't attend, I'd have just a family party foregoing all the wedding trappings. It would be a meet the newly married couple type of party.
  
  Also, a pot luck really isn't appropriate for a wedding reception. If it isn't during a meal time, just have a cake reception. If it is during a meal, have a simple catered meal (sandwiches and salads from a grocery or big box store are fine). Don't ask your guests to provide food for a reception that is thanking them for witnessing your wedding.

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• palm_trees_forever member

  

  July 2023

  The reason I said potluck is because, this is a small church that often does weddings attached to regular Sunday service, and they always do a potluck on Sunday, most of the church members would probably also be at the wedding, and we could supply more food to the potluck.

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• MobKaz member

  

  July 2023

  palm_trees_forever said:

  I need advice for planning weddings between two countries. My family is American, his is Canadian. We are looking at getting married in Canada (it has to be at a certain church because of his religion) and perhaps doing a reception/ "wedding celebration" in America, so that my relatives who can't travel don't feel slighted, and also so my friends can be there. We won't have much of a reception in Canada except maybe like a potluck in the tiny church basement. Very low key. The only thing is I feel awkward setting up a wedding party for everyone when none of my friends know each other and none of my friends know my fiance because all my friends have scattered themselves across the US. So I feel like the wedding celebration is going to be really awkward. What is it really...just a party with a bunch of people who don't know each other, and me in a dress? I feel like without the ceremony to tie it together it seems like a hollow event, and I'm not sure what to do to make it meaningful, because a second ceremony is even more pointless if we're already married.
  
  I guess party planning really stresses me out, I'm worried how my family will respond to me propositioning that our wedding happen in Canada instead of the US. A lot of my family is disabled and can't travel long distances so that's what would make the wedding celebration worth it to them, but I don't want them to feel like they're not getting to experience anything other than catered food and sitting around in a room...help. we plan to put both events on the invite so that my friends in New York might come to the wedding in Canada because it's probably closer... but like...how can I feel like the celebration/reception means something? 
  
  If you've done this tell me how it went! 

  For me, the actual wedding ceremony is the important component.  

  
  

  You and your FI need to make the decision that best reflects who you are as a couple.  If your parents and absolute “must have”s are able to attend the wedding in Canada, then simply opt for a small and intimate wedding there.  

  
  

  However, especially considering invited guests will need to travel and possibly incur expenses related to that travel, they do need to be hosted properly.  If you are married during a meal time, then make sure they are served a meal.  They need to have a place to sit while enjoying that meal.  

  
  

  Those who you wish you could invite but can’t should understand.  I had a close (relationship wise and proximity wise) nephew marry with only IMMEDIATE family.  It was their choice.  They wanted to pay for it all themselves and their budget afforded them a small guest list.  They are also “quiet” people and we have a large and loud family.  All is good and life went on.  

  
  

  I’m not a huge fan of an “after party” because they seem almost apologetic in nature.  If at some point you can host some kind of open house unrelated to the wedding, go for it!

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