Dear Prudence,
Three years ago, my wife and I moved away from the town we lived in for 20 years. We had a number of friends there and generally had a good social life. Since we moved, however, it has been very hard for my wife to make friends. And I know why. She is a terrible conversationalist. We have had a few outings with other couples, but no matter what we end up talking about, the conversation always becomes about her. She tells the same stories repeatedly. She talks over people. She doesn’t seem to be interested in what others are talking about. You can see it in their faces when my wife just turns it back to her when they are talking about something else. We go away from these outings with my wife thinking it went great, while I know we aren’t going to be hearing from the other couples. And I have been right way more often than not. I have tried to talk with her about this, but she doesn’t see the problem. But she is also frustrated and lonely and is genuinely a wonderful and nice person. She just isn’t great at conversations. How do I get her to see this? How can I help her with this?
—Wife Can’t Converse