Dear Prudence,
About six months ago, I met a really great guy online through a mobile game. We became close and sent messages back and forth all day for a few months. He’s kind, sweet, funny, supportive, and I can tell him anything. Even when I was suffering through a depressive episode and not myself, he still stuck by me and supported me. We’ve said that we love and care for each other and joked about running away together. He’s confided in me as well, about work, his kids, and his wife (they’ve been fighting regularly, and I can tell he’s not happy). We would always talk using Discord, but I stopped using it and playing mobile games about a month ago while I took some time to process the upcoming loss of a family member. We haven’t talked much since then as he doesn’t want to text (his wife has checked his phone in the past).
I miss him a lot and really want to reach out to him, but I do worry that our relationship might be considered an “emotional affair” and I don’t want to do anything that might interfere with his marriage. I consider him a friend, but some of the things he’s said in the past have led me to believe he might feel differently. I’ve never brought it up or tried to clarify, just always said how grateful I am for his friendship. Am I overreacting? Is it OK to reach out to him, or should I keep trying to move on without him in my life?
—Missing My Friend