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Ew.

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

I “ruined” Thanksgiving because my sister insisted on dragging her three sick kids to our parents and let them cough and sneeze all over the food and put their snot covered hands everywhere and I refused to eat anything they touched. I argued with my sister that she should have stayed home or put the kids to bed upstairs rather than risk all of us getting sick. Especially after COVID! My sister told me that I was “overreacting” and I ended up leaving early. Now, I am the only one in the family that isn’t sick as a dog. My sister is pissed at me because everyone is echoing what I said at dinner. I have stopped taking her calls because she refuses to drop the subject. How do I handle this at Christmas?

—Sick of This

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Re: Ew.

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    charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    Gross. 

    But also- if you have kids this time of year, and they’re in school or daycare, they’re probably sick. She absolutely shouldn’t have let them touch food, or go around without washing hands, covering mouths, but also I know a lot of people who would say “oh it’s just a cold, bring them over anyway”. 

    When I had Covid at thanksgiving I thought H and M should stay home- everyone at his parents insisted they come anyway since they hadn’t tested positive. Not something I’d be okay with but they were. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    The LW should ignore it.  Just be pleasant and polite.

    This achieves two things.  If the sister is still angry and wants to get a reaction, than there will be nothing more frustrating for her than the LW to be totally unruffled and act like the unpleasantness was so minor that it's not even registering anymore.

    But the sister might be ready to bury the hatchet and get over the fact she was wrong and it caused almost everyone to get sick.  If so, the LW not making it an issue will let everyone get over it and enjoy the holiday.

    If the sister brings it up, the LW should have a "rinse and repeat" statement ready that's something like, "Yeah.  And I was right.  Hopefully in the future you will keep your sick kids home or at least be more careful with their behavior around food."
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    banana468banana468 member
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    I feel like there's two things to this:
    -Kids at this time of the year are gross and kind of always have been.  
    -When they are gross you parent them and don't let them put their hands all over everything.    You pull them to the side, set them up with screens and tell them to stay put while Queen Elsa babysits. 

    I remember years ago that it was the weekend before Thanksgiving and my oldest niece was being baptized.  We showed up with Chiquita (had only one at the time) and by the end of the weekend she was snotty with a cold - standard fare for the kid.  Years later I'm greeted by SIL's aunt with, "remember that time we all got sick from your daughter??!?"  Yeah - my first thought was to tell her what I thought of her but just ignored it.


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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    banana468 said:
    I feel like there's two things to this:
    -Kids at this time of the year are gross and kind of always have been.  
    -When they are gross you parent them and don't let them put their hands all over everything.    You pull them to the side, set them up with screens and tell them to stay put while Queen Elsa babysits. 

    I remember years ago that it was the weekend before Thanksgiving and my oldest niece was being baptized.  We showed up with Chiquita (had only one at the time) and by the end of the weekend she was snotty with a cold - standard fare for the kid.  Years later I'm greeted by SIL's aunt with, "remember that time we all got sick from your daughter??!?"  Yeah - my first thought was to tell her what I thought of her but just ignored it.


    I don't have kids and have never seen Frozen.

    So it took me a minute to figure out who this Queen Elsa is and why is she babysitting, lol.
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    banana468banana468 member
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    short+sassy said:
    banana468 said:
    I feel like there's two things to this:
    -Kids at this time of the year are gross and kind of always have been.  
    -When they are gross you parent them and don't let them put their hands all over everything.    You pull them to the side, set them up with screens and tell them to stay put while Queen Elsa babysits. 

    I remember years ago that it was the weekend before Thanksgiving and my oldest niece was being baptized.  We showed up with Chiquita (had only one at the time) and by the end of the weekend she was snotty with a cold - standard fare for the kid.  Years later I'm greeted by SIL's aunt with, "remember that time we all got sick from your daughter??!?"  Yeah - my first thought was to tell her what I thought of her but just ignored it.


    I don't have kids and have never seen Frozen.

    So it took me a minute to figure out who this Queen Elsa is and why is she babysitting, lol.
    She babysits because she is the Queen of entertaining while telling you she is all out of f*cks to give. 
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    kerbohlkerbohl member
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    I think I would also refuse to eat anything someone else's kids touched.  Or that someone else touched who wasn't preparing .... I don't think it would be a big deal, but why did LW make it so obvious that they weren't eating anything the kids touched.  Unless the kids touched EVERYTHING in which case ... yeah, SIL is the AH here.

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