this is the code for the render ad
Hashtag Help

Bridesmaid help

Hi! When originally deciding bridesmaids, I was between two. A childhood friend and a newer friend. I went with the newer friend. Now, she has backed out due to pregnancy (no animosity, it’s a good reason). I feel so much guilt for not originally choosing my childhood friend. I want her to be a bridesmaid, but I don’t want her feelings to be hurt for being asked so late. I don’t want her to feel like the second choice, as she was on my original list but she might know that all the other BMs have been asked. 

For more info - 
Wedding is in six months. The bachelorette party is already planned and booked. I don’t care about uneven BM and GM numbers. 

Any advice? Should I just not invite her to be in the party to spare her feelings of being “second choice”? Or should I just tell her I’ve realized I want her up there? 

Thank you!

Re: Bridesmaid help

  • Hi! When originally deciding bridesmaids, I was between two. A childhood friend and a newer friend. I went with the newer friend. Now, she has backed out due to pregnancy (no animosity, it’s a good reason). I feel so much guilt for not originally choosing my childhood friend. I want her to be a bridesmaid, but I don’t want her feelings to be hurt for being asked so late. I don’t want her to feel like the second choice, as she was on my original list but she might know that all the other BMs have been asked. 

    For more info - 
    Wedding is in six months. The bachelorette party is already planned and booked. I don’t care about uneven BM and GM numbers. 

    Any advice? Should I just not invite her to be in the party to spare her feelings of being “second choice”? Or should I just tell her I’ve realized I want her up there? 

    Thank you!
    Why didn’t you include both of them from the beginning? If you had a reason to not ask her initially that’s probably still valid. I wouldn’t ask her now just because someone dropped out. You can invite her to any shower/bachelorette/ pre wedding events, and even ask if she wants to drop by wherever you’re getting ready if you think she’d enjoy it. But she likely knows she wasn’t in the original wedding party and may feel like second choice if you ask her now. 
  • Thank you for your response. I originally didn’t ask her because I felt that having 8 bridesmaids was too many. And the girl I ended up going with lived in town so it would have been easy for her to help with wedding stuff/planning/etc. I’m realizing I should have just went with my gut and asked her because now I feel guilty that I didn’t. I definitely don’t want to make her feel bad so I’ll include her in everything else. Thank you again for helping!! :)
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards