Wedding Woes

He is part of the family. Why are you doing this?

Dear Prudence,

I have a very ill nephew with end-stage disease in my old home country, and I am making plans to visit with my grown children. One has a significant other she’s been with for over 12 years, and she invited him. I said that I felt it would be best for just the immediate family to attend, which upset her. It just doesn’t feel comfortable to me even though I really like him and he has accompanied us to visit relatives in other countries in the past. They want to go to another city for a few days at the end of our trip, as they don’t get much time off and it is a vacation. These children are loving, but think I am being unreasonable. Would appreciate any advice, as I’ve racked my brain and can’t come up with anything.

—Hasty Invite

Re: He is part of the family. Why are you doing this?

  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Have they been together for 12 weeks or 12 years?!  The SO is family, LW, please stop.
  • You are being unreasonable. You don’t have to pay for her partner to travel but you can’t control if they go too. Or at least you shouldn’t try to. If you keep pushing this you’re only going to damage your relationship with your children. They’re traveling to see their dying cousin- you don’t get to determine who goes with them for that. 
  • How long does someone need to be a SO in order for them to be family?? 

    FFS LW you can't come up with ANYTHING??  How about you're a judgmental ass and some day this arbitrary feeling is going to come back to bite you where it hurts. 
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