Dear Prudence,
I have a good friend who I’ve known since 2019. He’s really come through for me before, and I’ve always trusted and respected him. The day after we spent an hour together, he notified me that he had just become symptomatic and tested positive for COVID. He also disclosed that he had not received the most recent vaccine. Two days later, I came down with COVID myself. I’m quite angry because he knows that my roommate has a compromised immune system, and he works out in public most of the day. I didn’t think to ask whether he got prior vaccines, or if he’s been putting my roommate and I at risk from the moment we started meeting in person again.
I have very strong feelings that I need to convey. I want to protect my roommate and our friendship. I want to confront him but also still be polite. How far do I go to stay courteous? Do I need to avoid words like “reckless” or “selfish” altogether, and if so, how do I still bring home the impact of how hurtful this was?
—Cautiously Confrontational