Dear Prudence,
I have known this guy for about a year now. We met in May of 2023 while I was swiping through Tinder looking for a causal relationship. I was very hesitant at first to meet him, as I was very hurt by a previous relationship and wasn’t sure if I was ready for a new one. It also didn’t help that he lived two hours away in another state. I eventually met him and we clicked instantly! We dated for a few months before he decided that it wasn’t going to work and broke it off. He wanted very different things in life than I did, so I don’t blame him.
After a couple of months of going no contact, we ended up spending time together when he visited my town with mutual friends of ours. Again, we instantly clicked and since then, we have continued to grow close. In fact, we now consider each other best friends, maybe even siblings, as we call each other brother or sister from time to time. Due to the distance, when we hang out it’s often for a few days and nights. I have to admit we do share the same bed when we see each other, although we do not touch one another. Recently, he has been seeing other women and I do find myself feeling jealous, especially if we haven’t seen each other in a while. I have expressed how this has made me feel to him and even explained that I don’t have those intimate feelings for him anymore. These feelings have become very confusing to me and I am genuinely worried that it will affect our relationship or how close we are in the future. What do I do, Prudence? How can I tell if I love him as a best friend or something more?
—Friend Zoned