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Wedding Woes

Focus more on finding the right person

I’m a 31-year-old straight woman, and I’ve never had sex. It’s not like I’m waiting for marriage or anything, it just hasn’t happened, and dating these days feels bleak at times. When I was younger, I never really saw the rush to have sex. My parents were always supportive and provided me with the information I needed about having safe sex so it’s never been a topic that couldn’t be discussed. Now that I’m older, I feel like I’m missing out! I am on birth control, mostly because it helps with my monthly cycle and cramps, but I feel like maybe I’m not putting out the right energy (if that makes sense) but I also don’t want to have sex with just anyone. I don’t know what to do.

—Curious But Not Rushed
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Re: Focus more on finding the right person

  • It doesn't help that libido peaks for women in their later 20s so LW may be in a position where it was a lower priority biologically when she was younger too.

    See a therapist?  Get on dating sites?  There's also nothing wrong with being picky but if the answer is that you have criteria any partner needs to meet then figure out what that criteria is. 
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