Wedding Woes

Break-up, seriously.

Dear Prudence, 

I live in a murder house. Obviously it wasn’t what I dreamed of for my future home, but it was a good price for what I got and I’m not a superstitious man. I’ve been here for five years now and have had no sign of ghosts. My dog sometimes stares at nothing, but he’s old and was never that bright. The problem is that I just found out that my girlfriend is planning to have a Halloween party at the house themed around the murder. She’s sold tickets to her friends—apparently, she plans to set up a seance.

I’ve tried to talk to her about this and she says that she doesn’t know why I care when I don’t believe in ghosts (she does), and I won’t even be there anyhow since I’ll be away for work. I think she wasn’t even planning on telling me about it. This is in such bad taste that I don’t understand how she can’t see it. No one will be happy about this. People on my street remember the woman who used to live in the house, her family still lives in town. I strongly suspect my girlfriend is going be the villain of the week on social media if this goes ahead. Also, while I don’t believe in spirits, it was a real person who died. They don’t deserve their death to become a sideshow.

How do I stop it though? I’ve told her “no” already, but one of her friends let slip that it’s still supposed to be going ahead. She seems hell-bent on doing this and I worry even breaking up with her won’t put her off pushing ahead with the party. I can’t call the police and ask them to watch my house in case there’s a party and most of my friends are her friends too so I don’t know if I could trust them to house-sit. At this point, I’ve asked my boss if there’s any way someone else could take over the on-site inspection for the company that week just so I can be at home to fend off any partygoers. If that isn’t possible, though, I’m not sure what I can do to stop her. That sounds ridiculous, I know, but I’d really expected “no” to work. (I haven’t broken up with her yet, I do plan to. Although she might beat me to the punch, at this point I’m half-convinced she only dated me so she could throw this party.)

—Bad Taste Halloween

Re: Break-up, seriously.

  • I don't understand.  Break up with her now and lock your house?  If she has keys, change the locks.  Then, if she does try to come on your property, you can call the cops.
  • Like @VarunaTT said, end the relationship and change the locks. Even aside from the distasteful nature of this event, it's disturbing that she decided to just go ahead and use your house for something without talking to you first. That is extremely inconsiderate and a bad sign of things to come. I'd get out now if I were you.
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  • This is diabolical and I fully agree with PP on breaking up and changing the locks
  • Why can't you break up and change the locks as PP said? 

    I'd be clear all over social media if the lock changing is an issue (thinking landlord/tenant legal issues depending on state??) that this is NOT your idea and you are working to put a stop to it. 

    If there's social media, why not post on it yourself? 


  • Change the locks and get a ring or security camera. If she breaks in, then you call the police from wherever you are. 
  • Does the gf live in the house too?  The LW isn't clear.  The solution depends on this information.

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  • MNNEBride said:
    Does the gf live in the house too?  The LW isn't clear.  The solution depends on this information.

    I was thinking this foo.  Is this partly her house?

    also, American Horror Story vibes anyone?

  • This is also why I don’t really find shows based around murders all that appealing. People died. It’s being used for capital and is being sensationalized. And most of the time family and friends are still around. 

    But yeah, don’t know why he hasn’t broken up yet. What is he waiting for? To come home and have one more hookup? Just break it off, change the locks, and ask for the police to patrol the street a few extra times that night and that there’s plans for an unauthorized party. 


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