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Fri-yay

ei34ei34 member
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in Wedding Woes
How’s everyone today? Hope you all have something restful and enjoyable planned for the weekend!
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Re: Fri-yay

  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
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    It should be a fairly mellow weekend here. We've got friendsgiving tomorrow night, but it's gotten pretty low key since it started being kid friendly. I'm trying to figure out a dessert to make instead of the same old same old pecan pie/pumpkin pie. Maybe a maple cheesecake. 

    I have no desire to work today. I'm just mentally exhausted. 
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  • ei34ei34 member
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    Enjoy the friendsgiving!

    It's bingo night at the middle school tonight, tomorrow is the Boy Scout Thanksgiving-in-the-forest event, and Sunday will be a mix of errands, cleaning, cooking and getting some relaxing in too.
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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
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    I hosted book club last night so had the last bits of putting stuff away this morning. H and I worked out together with our trainer. It is kind of fun to do that with him once and awhile.

    Tomorrow we are going back to Chicago to watch the boys while DD and SIL have a little get away. We will be back on Tuesday because Wednesday is the day of appointments for both of us.

    I woke up super early this morning - a little before 4 ugh! I see a nap in my future today.
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  • CasadenaCasadena member
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    Had book club last night and it was fun as always. I feel a bit awkward sometimes, because there's kind of a core group of 4 that got really close before I joined and they are SO much fun. But i feel a bit like an outsider bc we have a blast here once a month and then they all hang out a ton outside of that too. They've invited me/my fam a couple of times, but definitely not always. That's totally ok obviously, but I also would love to hang out more and feel like i don't know how to really break into the group. Then i get in my head about it.  My family was also not regularly social growing up and i'm realizing i have no idea how to navigate these kinds of friend/family dynamics. Social anxiety is fun *face plam*.

    My parents are visiting this weekend and i'm pretty excited about that. They're staying through Sunday night which they don't usually do, so we'll be able to get a couple things done around the house on Sunday finally with some extra eyes on the kiddos.

    I'm getting my haircut this afternoon which is long overdue and making chili for dinner. Hopefully a nice chill weekend!
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  • levioosalevioosa member
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    I hope Bingo goes in your favor! @ei34

    Hopefully your weekend is fun and restful @MyNameIsNot

    Have a safe drive and fun with the boys! @ILoveBeachMusic

    I feel your pain @casadena. Social anxiety is the worst. Could you feel out suggesting coffee or drinks on the weekend with each other and see how that goes? I'm sure it has nothing to do with actively trying to exclude you, they've just been close a long time and sometimes that gives people blinders. 

    Work today. Just bracing myself for a rough busy day. I've made a tactical error. H is bringing stuff over to his parent's house (Huge MAGA/Fox/Newsmax people) for TG and I wasn't thinking and suggested that we get dinner since I'm in the area for work. I didn't even think about the election when I suggested but I am now and I might lose it if they gloat. 

    Otherwise, SSDD. Monday is busy so I need to keep that in mind for whatever plans I develop for the weekend. 


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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    I’m in hour 2 of our advance computing team trying to fix my computer. The specialty guy had to get his manager (who is now trying everything first guy already tried) to try and fix it. 

    Not much planned for the weekend. H is going to Pittsburgh for the Steelers game Sunday but that’s about it. 

    @Casadena I totally get that. One thing I’ve been mindful of this year is, if we want community we have to create it. So maybe invite them? Maybe coffee or something else? I think generally people are intentionally exclusive I think they just get into patterns of behavior and we all just do what we know. And we’re all a little more socially awkward after Covid! 
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    My H and I had a big talk/strategy session last night about our game plan going forward for our move.  Doh!  I just realized I forgot to mention something about potentially waiting to sell our vacant SFH, in case we want to sell our house first and need somewhere to move in the interim.

    Unfortunately with the new administration coming into power, I expect the ACA to be repealed.  Which means all the state exchange health marketplaces and their government subsidies to buy policies will disappear.

    Keeping my job and working remote has always been the ideal.  Or having a remote job or in-place job in Cincinnati to go to would also be great.  But none of that was necessary and could come later, if it made sense to move first and finally be free.  But that hinged on being able to buy affordable medical insurance for us in the private market.

    But now, one of us HAS to have a job lined up before we move.  It's another big obstacle in a situation that already has too many moving parts.  We talked more in depth about other "not so ideal" scenarios that could happen now that a job needs to come first.  Like one of us gets an in-person Cincinnati job and needs to report to work in 2-3 weeks.  While the other person is left to deal with selling the real estate, moving the furniture, and a bigger chunk of the packing.

    I'm not in a good mental state to do it yet, but I also need to talk to my work.  The last place my possibility of working remote was left at was that I would let my boss know when I put my personal home on the market.  And more importantly, when I went under contract.  Because THAT would be the 4-6 week countdown of my moving out of state.  I know these people.  They aren't going to make any "final decision" on if 100% remote is okay until I make them.

    But now we are going to have a different discussion when I am ready, which will be soon.  That now my move does hinge on having a job lined up.  So now they need to make a decision.  Or I will be actively looking for other opportunities.

    Of course, sugar-coated all up with how much I would like to stay working for them and the client in this role if it can be 100% remote, once I move.  But regrettably...blah, blah, blah.  I know I won't have an answer in that meeting.  My big boss is pretty high up in the company, but it isn't solely his decision and the client would also need to okay it.  The two managers I mainly support work directly for the client and have both said they'd be fine with it.  It's not solely their decision either, for the client side.  At least not for a "yes", but their opinion matters.  And my request would be dead in its tracks if they said "no", so I appreciate having their support.

    I haven't seen one of those managers in-person for months, lol.  He mostly WFH, but often comes in on Tuesdays/Thursdays.  Except now he works on a different floor than me.  The other manager WFHs most of the time.  He lives about two hours away from the office.  But he will pop in a few times a year when big meetings are going on.  So yeeaahhh.  It's not like I even see these people in-person very often anyway.
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  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    No big plans for the weekend.  I'm only at work for about another 1/2 hour, then heading to mom's to get her car "winterized", get our Thanksgiving ordered, drop by Kohl's for Amazon returns (I am irrationally annoyed by this but one of my returns wouldn't use the UPS store?), and then I think I'll stop and get a bottle of my favorite NA wine.  My friend wants me to come to her family's apple butter making day on Sunday and I just don't want to.  Socializing with people I don't know has gotten so hard for me and I just don't have the energy to push it.

    This morning I realized that I would be losing my nice big bathtub that lets me soak in water up to my neck with nothing showing by leaving this place and I'm mopey about that.

    Big hugs to everyone that is going to have a hard Thanksgiving.  My cousin, A, is coming to visit me and Mom.  I can't imagine she's a MAGA, but I don't really know.  Though I think that the reason she's coming here is because her family is going someplace else and she refuses to associate with that part of her family.  And I'm 99% sure that part would be MAGA.  So fingers crossed.
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  • levioosalevioosa member
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    Oh and @VarunaTT what is your favorite NA wine? Is it a white like a Sauvignon? There are some days I just want one glass of wine but I don't want the alcohol. I basically drink water, coffee and some tea, but sometimes tea is not the vibe I want for dinner or after work. 


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  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    "It's Not A Sin".  It's an white, alcohol removed, which I've found taste better.  This one is still sparkling, but it's not so damn sweet, which so many of them are. 

    I have yet to find a red, but if you add bitters to an NA red, it helps a lot.  Do not try Fre, it's so bad (I threw it down the drain, I couldn't get it fixed no matter what trick I tried). All the Bitters is a company that makes NA bitters and they have one called New Orleans specifically for this purpose and it helps a lot:  https://allthebitter.com/collections/classic-bitters/products/new-orleans-bitters.  I also put like half a shot of an NA aperol into them and that did the same thing. 

    For a rose, I recommend Joyus, soooo good.  

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  • banana468banana468 member
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    Thanks for the tips @VarunaTT.   FIL now has Type II diabetes and his liver cannot process alcohol so something low sugar that he can consume w/ Thanksgiving is a nice idea.  His wine taste in general is....Franzia - and DH and I would rather water than drink it. 
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    levioosa said:
    @charlotte989875 Improving my community was one of my goals for this year. Now, it's been a shit show with my life/family (and country) falling apart, but I am trying so hard to build up a better circle, at least with being in better contact with friends. I think building up a circle with new people is going to be next year's project. Hanging out with my Aunt and Uncle made my heart hurt a little, because it's the kind of social network and support system I desperately crave, but just don't have and they live really far away. And those relationships don't happen overnight either. Being an adult is lonely sometimes. All we can do is try. 

    @short+sassy I'm so sorry you're already having to make changes to your life plans because some fuckfaces in government don't believe in healthcare as a right. 

    Kitty was highhhhh AF last night. And this morning. And probably all day today. She was given a long acting opioid so she is tripping balls. lol. At least she's a funny and sweet drunk (I've never heard her purr so loudly and the second she sees me it's like a tiny lawnmower has been turned on she's so happy). She lost two teeth = ( but at least the quote was about 1/3 of what they thought it would be so that was good news. Not cheap news, but much much better than the nearly $1.3- 1.8K they originally quoted
    So glad to hear Kitty is doing well and that the cost was so much less!  I'm a little jealous of her.  I'd rather be at home high AF, instead of at work right now also, lol.

    My next-door tenants used to be a woman who had just graduated as a veterinarian.  Her b/f had been accepted into Tulane Medical School, so they moved to New Orleans and she got her first vet job here.

    She told me cats are hilarious when they are on pain meds.  She said even the meanest and orneriest cats, who just want to bite/scratch/hiss at you when they come in, will turn into the biggest and sweetest cuddle bugs when they're high. 
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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    edited November 2024
    wow that’a a lot of money for a tooth pull, @levioosa.  I guess I’m thankful insurance covers a lot for humans.
    I don’t understand people who like dry wines, None of them taste good to me.  When I go to a winery, I almost always get a fruit wine. 
    You have a lot to think about @short+sassy!
    i’m blowing all my leaves to the curb today/tomorrow and I don’t know if I just have less leaves this year or I’m not doing it on the windiest day of the year like last year, but I suspect it won’t take as many rounds as last year and clearing off my driveway/grass is a good feeling.
    I can’t stop thinking how good The Little Mermaid is and I think I need to go back and see it!
    edit to add; loneliness and adulthood. I know I live a fairly active and social life, but when I’m home alone I think I’m more bored than lonely.  Could that be what you’re all feeling? Bored? I mean there’s so much someone can do in life that doesn’t have endless money…
    edit again; not sure if anyone lost any sleep over this, but I found one pair of the missing eyeglasses! Still need the new order anyway though 

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  • levioosalevioosa member
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    @charmedpam I have the opposite problem. I am almost never bored, but I do feel socially isolated. Family things and personal health issues take up all of my spare time and energy. If I'm a slug at home it's really only because I have nothing else to give. And I want to go out and try meet-ups, but between the exhaustion and social anxiety on top of family stuff it's hard. SIL and I constantly have the conversation that if we ever won the mega lottery, she would keep working because she feels like she would be bored. And all I can think is, money is like my biggest issue, if I could suddenly afford care for my parents and grandparents, take care of bills without stressing, etc, I would be living it up with all of the hobbies and travel. I do not need work to take up my time. Work is 100% a necessary evil to me lol. But hobbies and even money don't replace a robust social network and the support that it provides. And it's really important to health to have a good supportive network. I am that network for so many people, but I really don't have one for me and it's weighing really heavily on me. 

    @banana468 My dad is kind of teetotaler adjacent (will have the rare Pina Colada and blended Strawberry Margarita) and recently he excitedly told us he'd finally found a wine he likes and wants to have with us. It was Franzia. I was like lol love that for you but no thank you ever. If the option is Franzia or water...I'm sticking with the water. 

    Thanks for the recommendation! @VarunaTT


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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    @levioosa, you brought back such a memory, lol!

    I am rarely a wine snob.  I have no right to be, because I happily drink the cheaper stuff like Yellow Tail.

    But my ex-b/f's mom drank that Franzia box wine.  And only the Pink Zinfandel.  I have to suppress the urge to gag every time I think of it.  SO sweet.  So low quality.

    They were a very "traditional" family, in that she worked a full-time job and was also expected to do all the cooking and cleaning.  To be fair, she brought some of it on herself because she enjoyed her role as martyr.  The dad was a POS who definitely wouldn't lift a finger to help.  But my b/f would offer help or just start a household chore and she would shoo him away.  I would also offer to help her do dishes after dinner and things like that, but I was shooed away also.

    She was frequently a rude bitch to me.  I was invited to their house for Thanksgiving.  In the weeks leading up to it, she frequently complained about how much work it was going to be to cook that much food.  I offered to bring a side and specifically mentioned my experience in making it, so she knew I was planning to make it myself and not buy it.  I knew homecooked meals were important to her.  I offered to cook and bring a pumpkin pie.  I suggested a couple other fall-like desserts if she would like me to make that in addition or instead.

    When those offers were refused, I offered to go over to their house that morning and help her prepare the food.  No.  She can "do it herself".

    I dunno.  I just wasn't brought up to show up empty-handed.  I asked my b/f (D) if he knew of anything his mom would appreciate.  Flowers? A plant?  A nice bottle of wine?

    He said one of her favorite types of wine was a Reisling, but she had trouble finding them.  A sweet, dessert wine.  Of course that is one of Ms. Pink Zin's favorites, lol.  Great!  Something for me to bring that I hope will be a treat for her. You do have to go to a wine/specialty liquor store for a Reisling, at least out here.

    I arrive on Thanksgiving.  Show her the bottle and say, "I brought some wine.  D said you like Reislings."  She scrunches her face up in disgust and angerly tells me, "What is that?  That's not the wine I drink.  Are you expecting me serve that?"

    Me, "Oh no!  I'm bringing it as a hostess gift and to thank you for all the hard work you've done preparing this meal.  I would never insist it be opened now.  Please enjoy it at your leisure."

    I assure you all, I kept the heavy sarcastic tone I was thinking this in only in my head.  Far be it from me to intrude on the wine pairings of Pink Zinfandel already planned for each course.
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