Tired Tuesday

ei34 · February 11

How’s everyone today?

Sending safe vibes to anyone who’s supposed to get hit with more snow overnight!

ei34 · February 11

My brother accidentally sent me a text that he meant for my mom that was hurtful. I happened to catch it bc my phone was in hand (I was helping one of the kids with long division homework and needed my calculator to confirm the answer was correct) and texted “ouch 😝” a second before he unsent it.
He could have apologized or ignored me, but ended up doubling down on why he sent it with four long gaslighting texts. I didn’t reply bc I didn’t have a back and forth in me (and I try to model good screen behaviors in front of the kids who will have phones someday, so I rarely use my phone between 3-8pm). But I totally slogged through the evening. I slept poorly as a result, hence the tired Tuesday, but I had good chats with my sisters and am feeling good today.

That aside it’s pretty SSDD. Work is busy, kids and I are relatively healthy, etc.

Casadena · February 11

Woke up feeling pretty good again this morning and I think it's the knock-on effects of a ton of sleep last week and coincidentally no alcohol for a couple weeks as well. G unfortunately woke up with a fever and is home today/tomorrow. N was so sad and sweet going into school this morning - he REALLY misses big brother when he's not there. I have a busy week, tons of deliverables and jury duty Thursday so trying to cram as much into today as possible so i can be home a bit more easily if needed later in the week.

@ei34 that sucks about your brother - i'm sorry.

CharmedPam · February 11

Oh no! I’m glad you did get a glimpse of it though @ei34, so you’re not in the dark about anything! I’m sorry you had to see it though.
I am livid. I used homeaglow years ago, like over 10. I was using her to clean my apartment before my parents showed up. The cleaners car wouldn’t start so I had to cancel her and clean it myself.

Cut to current day: They had another promo of first cleaning $19 and then you need to sign up and agree to at least two more cleanings in their program.

I had the cleaner set to 8 today because my parents are coming on Thursday. Guess what happened? This lady’s car wouldn’t start (not the same person). So now I’m cleaning again on my own. She wanted to reschedule (for tomorrow - your car will be ok then? Plus we have a snow storm coming in) but I’m in a sales conference all day Wed and Thursday. So it wouldn’t make sense for her to clean AFTER my parent arrived.

I emailed them and told them how ironic it was that 10 years ago their cleaner’s car broke down and I gave them a second chance and it happened again? Maybe they should vet their cars like uber and lyft does? (i’m almost certain it’s not a car issue either).
Edit for clarity. Homeaglow matches you with cleaners much like drive shares (so no, not the same person from 10 yrs ago) and their customer service is also lacking

short+sassy · February 11

@ei34, I'm sorry you saw that text and it put you in a funk.

I'm in a bad mood this morning. I hate this city and I hate the company I work for. I don't usually hate this company, but I do today. The city hasn't fixed the streets and (possibly) street lights yet, because they are insanely inefficient with everything they do. But since they've never cared about their citizens, there is no motivation to improve.

Apparently, the power was out this morning around my workplace. But do they bother texting anyone to WFH until the matter is resolved? No.

That's okay. I'll risk my life driving through five non-working stoplights at major intersections in a city with some of the worst drivers in the country. Though one of them...less than two miles from the Superdome....has been down for about 3 months, so I guess it doesn't count with this morning's problems.

Good thing all my coworkers are in such pristine physical condition that they can so easily walk up 5-6 floors to get to their workstation /s.

But I did enjoy sitting on my ass for 90 minutes this morning playing on my phone until the power came back on. Which was earlier than expected! Weird they would prefer that over people staying home and being productive, but here we are.

banana468 · February 11

@ei34 I'm sorry about your brother. If I remember correctly at least you and your sister see eye to eye right? How frustrating that he doubled down but...those are then texts that he can't un send. I admire you for taking the moral high ground even when it results in fewer hours of sleep.

Last night took forever to fall asleep and it didn't help that I had a bloody nose as I started to wash my face. I'm not sure if it's the weather or something else (I started liquid B-12 daily?) but I've had a couple of these recently and I try to avoid being gross all over my pillow.

Infusion day so I'm plowing through a half day before we have a drive followed by sitting.

levioosa · February 11

@ei34 I'm sorry you saw that text.

@CharmedPam that's so annoying about the service. I used one too and it was just so wildly unpredictable with quality and timing I gave up. And do Lyft/Uber vet their cars? I've gotten some reallllly bad ride shares. On Friday one of our rides smelled horribly of cigarettes and I wish that was an automatic disqualification. Also our first ride drove 15 miles under the speed limit (in perfect, clear weather) and that was making me scream. lol.

@short+sassy the whole corporate belief that people won't work unless they're physically in office is so annoying. And wrong.

Weekend was...a lot. Friday we went to our comedy show which was a lot of fun, but very late and I typically don't have hard liquor much at all (or only 1 drink) and I had two espresso martini's and a cosmo so I basically was deceased all day Saturday. We were supposed to go out to dinner with H's Uncle but no one ever responded to us about timing which was a little hurtful, but tbh I wasn't all that upset. Uncle and I got into it in 2015 about Cheeto apologetics and I've been over him ever since.

Sunday we went to my Grandparent's house and the best laid plans did not, of course, go according to plan. Grandpa didn't look good and his sugar was through the roof so I ended up taking him to the ER. The whole situation was extremely frustrating, and he had just been at the ER at a different hospital last Tuesday but they wouldn't release his records to us. He had an infection and they would not tell me the susceptibility results from the culture. They had him on an antibiotic which was definitely not going to work (I could see the actual bacteria result), and then when I was trying to ask for more info, they refused. I fucking hate healthcare and I'm in it. Needless to say it was a long draining day. We got home yesterday afternoon and I basically just crashed out on the couch trying to recover for the work week.

Otherwise SSDD.

CharmedPam · February 11

@levioosa, I was told uber had a system to approve the cars or not. At the very least, they have to work? Lol
Oh no @short+sassy! That’s super annoying despite some phone play time. If they knew, they could have let everyone know.
@levioosa, that’s a lot. No wonder you crashed! Is G’pa diabetic? I know antibiotics raise blood sugars too but have to be used for infections so it’s a lose lose. Last time I had surgery, I noticed my eyes were a bit blurry when reading things on the phone. I googled and antibiotics can mess up vision. After I was off them for a few days, it went back to normal. It was crazy an antibiotic could do that, and I never noticed before!

ei34 · February 11

Thanks everyone! Yes banana my sisters and I are close and often on the same page. (Especially as far as dealing with our brother.)

@CharmedPam that's so frustrating! @short+sassy your company is ridiculous with their WFH policy. If a job can be done from home (and employees will be safe, that commute sounds treacherous) why not allow it? @Casadena healing vibes G's way! @levioosa healing vibes to your grandfather - I'm glad that he has you but how frustrating about all the ER nonsense

VarunaTT · February 11

Woke up feeling good again. IDK, maybe it's okay to feel good daily and I shouldn't be worried? Maybe I'm in denial? IDK.

Had a long talk with Mom. We're going on Friday to buy a new washer/dryer and light fixture. There's a good President's Day sale at Lowe's and we need to get these things before prices start skyrocketing. She has also decided that since I'm moving in and can help, she wants a dog. I don't necessarily mind, but Harley has never been dog tested, so I have put that off until we've been living there a little while. I told Mom it wasn't healthy for Harley to switch residences AND have to deal with a new dog, all at once. I also said, Harley was first and I'm committed to her, so if she doesn't tolerate the dog....no dog. She understands, I think.

I'm supposed to go out of town this weekend, but the weather is looking suspicious. I'm going to be very upset if this doesn't work out.

Work is going okay; I received some more "props" which is company recognition for an idea I put into place for my small team. It's working really well and is going to be pushed out to our entire regional team. It's really not that big of a thing, it's just Outlook email rules, but I guess no one else really thought of using that tool for these things.

I haven't told anyone else, b/c I don't want to jinx myself, but I've lost 10 pounds. I finally figured out a food system that is working for me and I'm seeing the results.

Also, does anyone have any deodorant recommendations? Preferably something in unscented. Perimenopause has got me smelling like a teenage boy. Or other general recommendations to help with this? It's gross and I hate it.

VarunaTT · February 11

also, @ei34 I'm sorry that happened. Even more sorry he tried to gaslight you about it. @leviosaa I'm sorry your family continues to be difficult, it must be exhausting. Please take care of yourself too. You've got it coming in all spheres of life.

Also, I'm happy that even though I work for a corporation, they are doubling down on WFH and DEI. My main work page has a big Black History Month column on it, as well as some seminars they're holding.

charlotte989875 · February 11

I’m tired too, baby J hasn’t been sleeping well and it’s been rough. And H and I had a thing last night. He’s so unhappy with his job, with having our moms in our space all the time, with me being exhausted from being up with J that he’s miserable and cranky and it’s apparently everyone else’s fault, and he won’t actually go to therapy to deal with it. And I just… I’m exhausted.

levioosa · February 11

*Hugs* @charlotte989875

@CharmedPam He is diabetic but he's never needed medication for it. A1C is usually well controlled for his age. Most likely the infection is causing his sugar to be elevated, and we don't always do super strict glucose control but letting his BGL soar into the 400s isn't right either. If he had been hanging out with BGL in the 200s I wouldn't have been happy about it but I wouldn't have been so worried and that could have waited until his PCP appointment. But if someone's BGL is 400 and they haven't even eaten for 6 hours at the very least some labs are warranted to make sure we aren't heading towards DKA land with an infection like that. His PCP was ticked when he found out they tried to write it off as nothing. Navigating healthcare is a nightmare when you have an advocate, let alone when you have no idea what is happening. Silver lining was I started "interviewing" Grandpa in the ER since we had nothing but time and I started to write down his history for later. Then I asked Grandma about it the next day and, uh, there were some differing opinions on how their courtship began, lmao.

Jen4948 · February 11

Life is...okay.

Extremely busy. Tax season is going on now, and I am working two contract jobs for the season. One is remote, which I like (it carried over from last year). The other is a new one that I started just before Christmas of 2024 and requires me to work onsite. Not so good. The job itself is fine, and I like my coworkers, but I hate the long hours coupled with commuting. It makes me feel so tired at the end of every day. At least the contract ends by the end of tax season and I can move on if I feel like it.

My brother and I are trying to settle my dad's estate and arrange the unveiling of his headstone (a kind of follow up to his funeral). My brother got his apartment cleaned out and onto the market, and we just accepted a good offer for it. It still feels weird though, because I lived there for a couple of years and visited there on a regular basis, so knowing that it belongs to someone else seems so odd.

Hugs for everyone.
@ei34, I'm sorry about your brother. That really sucks.
@Casadena, I hope G feels better soon.
@CharmedPam, that is annoying. Probably not a coincidence about both cleaners' cars breaking down. If the third time isn't a charm, switch cleaning services.
@short+sassy, that would annoy me too.
@banana468 I hope you're feeling better.
@levioosa I hope Grandpa is better soon.
@VarunaTT, it sounds like you're hanging in. Good.
@charlotte989875, I hope things are better soon.

short+sassy · February 11

VarunaTT said:

Woke up feeling good again. IDK, maybe it's okay to feel good daily and I shouldn't be worried? Maybe I'm in denial? IDK.

Had a long talk with Mom. We're going on Friday to buy a new washer/dryer and light fixture. There's a good President's Day sale at Lowe's and we need to get these things before prices start skyrocketing. She has also decided that since I'm moving in and can help, she wants a dog. I don't necessarily mind, but Harley has never been dog tested, so I have put that off until we've been living there a little while. I told Mom it wasn't healthy for Harley to switch residences AND have to deal with a new dog, all at once. I also said, Harley was first and I'm committed to her, so if she doesn't tolerate the dog....no dog. She understands, I think.

I'm supposed to go out of town this weekend, but the weather is looking suspicious. I'm going to be very upset if this doesn't work out.

Work is going okay; I received some more "props" which is company recognition for an idea I put into place for my small team. It's working really well and is going to be pushed out to our entire regional team. It's really not that big of a thing, it's just Outlook email rules, but I guess no one else really thought of using that tool for these things.

I haven't told anyone else, b/c I don't want to jinx myself, but I've lost 10 pounds. I finally figured out a food system that is working for me and I'm seeing the results.

Also, does anyone have any deodorant recommendations? Preferably something in unscented. Perimenopause has got me smelling like a teenage boy. Or other general recommendations to help with this? It's gross and I hate it.

Start skyrocketing? But really, that is a good plan. Gosh, who would have thought imposing tariffs on our largest trading partners would massively jack up prices on almost everything. Other than world history and almost every economist telling us this is exactly what would happen.

I really agree with you on the dog thing. I know you also like dogs, so it might be a great option for the future. But cats especially like familiarity and routine. Harley needs to get very used to the new normal before thinking about introducing dog.

Our cat Nip was still alive when we moved into our current house. She did nothing but cry for almost two days

. We felt so bad! We brought Izzy home about a year later, though it wasn't that long for Nip's benefit. Nip was afraid of and avoided her for a few days. But warmed up to her and got over her fear pretty quickly. She was still aloof with Izzy most of the time, but played with her occasionally. Izzy would be SO excited when that happened! She loved that cat, even though Nip usually ignored her, lol.

Yay! Congrats on the weight loss! I'm glad you found a food system that is working for you. That is so key, especially when it is foods you like (I hope).

Take your measurements and before photos. I never took "official" before photos and really regret it. I didn't think to take my measurements until I was 4 months along. I'm glad I finally did because it's been another great sign of my progress. But I can only make a broad guestimate as to how many inches I lost before I started. In fact, it's been over two months since the last time I did! I need to try and remember to do that tonight.

Some tips to avoid potentially disappointing things. Stalls will probably happen sometimes, no matter what you do. Staying the course usually resolves them, but it can be frustrating in the interim. Remember that weight for women almost always fluctuates before/after/during their period. Good times, lol!

Depending on how much you want to lose, you could hit a point where your maintenance calories change and weight loss becomes harder with the same diet. The less we weigh, the lower our maintenance calories are. I've always known that, but it has still caught me unaware a few times!

short+sassy · February 11

@VarunaTT, I forgot to mention deodorant. I like those newer "prescription strength you don't need a prescription for" deodorants that came out a few years ago. They advertise they work for up to 72 hours, but I still put them on every morning. I don't have to worry about smell coming back at all.

I've recently been trying that Lume whole body deodorant. I really like it, but I'm not sure if it comes unscented. I have the Pine scent. It's a nice smell, but whoa! It's a strong smell.

charlotte989875 · February 12

short+sassy said:

@VarunaTT, I forgot to mention deodorant. I like those newer "prescription strength you don't need a prescription for" deodorants that came out a few years ago. They advertise they work for up to 72 hours, but I still put them on every morning. I don't have to worry about smell coming back at all.

I've recently been trying that Lume whole body deodorant. I really like it, but I'm not sure if it comes unscented. I have the Pine scent. It's a nice smell, but whoa! It's a strong smell.

I’ve tried the Lume too and the scents are… weird? I have sage & lavender and the tangerine, which I do like better but they just seem odd to me. I do like the whole body deo when I run during the day and don’t have time to shower until later.

VarunaTT · February 12

Lume does have an unscented. I was actually looking at their stuff, b/c I've heard generally good things. I was curious about their body wash too, but I'm supposed to use specific brands for soaps and lotions b/c of my allergies and what it does to my skin. I just dislike having another thing that I can't just get with my regular grocery order. I'm going to look at the other whole body ones that are coming out. Hopefully they have unscented choices. Deodorant scents tend to make me actually physically ill. It might be better with my allergies now, but I don't really want to risk it. Plus, it's always seemed odd to me that deodorant has a scent.

The food system isn't anything special. I needed something that would work w/all my brain things. So I basically have 3 "bases": lettuce, potatoes, and tortillas. Then I have 2 proteins already cooked (this week, chicken and salmon) and a whole bunch of veggies (and other things like edamame and black beans) already chopped up and in various baggies/tupperware containers in the fridge. I can have a loaded salad, loaded potato, or a wrap. It's simplifies decision making b/c I pick one of three, it's prepped but not so much so I get grossed out at "leftovers", and I like all of the things I have to chose from. I'm not paying attention to calories at all; I'm paying attention to eating consistently, at the same time every day, whether I feel hungry or not. Which then also helps me take my meds at the same time every day. Which is also probably why I'm waking up feeling good. Then I can expend the energy around food to keep myself from binging at night. I haven't decided if I'm going to weigh myself weekly or monthly or even on a schedule at all. Sometimes, taking down measurements of any kind, will trip my OCD into action, and there's never productive outcomes from that happening.

ei34 · February 12

@VarunaTT might be an overly basic brand (that you've already tried bc it's in every pharmacy) but I am also overly sensitive to scented products and love Dove deodorant - the sensitive skin one has zero scent and is effective.

VarunaTT · February 12

@ei34 Thank you! I'll try it. I've used Secret unscented for years, b/c it's the only one I can usually find consistently at stores. I'll never understand how unscented is almost always sold out....but they just keep making MORE scents.

levioosa · February 12

I've used Secret Clinical Strength unscented and I like that one. I found it more effective than the Dove Clinical Strength.

short+sassy · February 12

@VarunaTT, we are so alike with attitudes toward cooking/food prep, lol. I have my set of easy and quick to prepare recipes that align with both what I like to eat and what works best for my losing weight. Either myself or my H batch prepare 2-3 of them for the week, so I have some variety but without having to think too much.

My cooking laziness was a detriment for me before I was seriously trying to lose weight. I ate fast food around 3x/week because it was so easy to run across the street for lunch when I was at work. There is both a Wendys and a Popeyes, lol. Or stop to bring home a fast food dinner on my way home from work.

But I recognized that about myself and have turned it into an advantage. If I already have healthy/delicious/cheaper food in my fridge, it's more hassle and takes longer to stop or go out for fast food. FF isn't off limits. Nothing is because if I "banned" something, I would rebel against myself, lol. But now I'm more purposeful when I eat less healthy or higher calorie foods.

I feel the least stressed and most in control when I keep track of the "numbers and data", like daily weigh-ins/calories/measurements. But I sometimes forget many people are just the opposite. It sounds like you are knocking it out of the park with establishing good patterns that are helping you feel better and healthier. That's the important thing! Losing weight along the way is the cherry on top.

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