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I'd stop answering the phone

CasadenaCasadena member
Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Woes

How do I deal with my verbally and emotionally abusive father? I am 46 and am still finding him interjecting his views on my life in forms of harassing phone calls and drop in visits. He does not exhibit this behavior in front of anyone, just me. I have him blocked on my phone, he is divorced, and I am his only child, and I worry about something happening and not being “there” for it. Having a relationship with him is impossible and when we do get along, I find I am very reserved and guarded with what I do, share, and say. This past month he was upset with a news story and he called me screaming insults and profanities. I find him hard to balance with my spouse and kids. Any suggestions?

—Dad’s Still Blocked

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Re: I'd stop answering the phone

  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If you have him blocked on your phone, how is he calling and screaming? 

    It's time to go no contact. That means you block him everywhere. When he shows up, you tell him to leave or don't answer the door. There's no way to safely engage with this. 
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Do not answer.

    Or at least, tell him you're going to start to hang up.    Tell him that you're not going to engage with someone who screams at you and he needs to stop.   If he doesn't then that's on him.
    Report Reply
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