Dear Prudence,
I have been dating “James” for a while, and he has a 10-year-old daughter. We’ve gotten to the point of seriousness where he introduced me to her as a friend. The problem is, interactions with her make skin crawl. She still talks like a toddler. “Dada juicy juicy leese.” She still sucks her thumb and can’t work out the simplest problem. Dada needs to change the channel, change her out of her clothes, and do an entire labyrinthine ritual to get her to go to sleep. And she isn’t developmentally delayed! She code switches easily with her peers and other people to the point that I wonder about multiple personalities.
Her mother finds this “cute and charming.” James doesn’t like it but indulges it anyway. I’ve pointed out that this is beyond weird and that she is ruining her teeth with the pacifier, but James brushes me off. When I interact with her, I either ignore the baby behavior or treat her like an actual toddler. “Can she go to the potty like a big girl or does she need help?” This gets me a very negative reaction, but she will be in middle school next year. This is too much. What can I do, if anything?
—Bad Baby Talk