Talk to your son first

Casadena · July 24

Dear Prudence,

A week ago, I learned that my 35-year-old son donated sperm to a lesbian couple he’s friends with, and they just had a girl.

He’s not married and has expressed no interest in having children, so this came as a complete shock. My son is an only child, and I have been lamenting the prospect of never having grandchildren. Would it be acceptable if I approached this couple to ask if I can be in my granddaughter’s life?

—Grandma From Afar

VarunaTT · July 24

He doesn't have children. Stay out of this.

flantastic · July 24

This seems like the sort of thing the son should have known better than to tell his mom about. (Assuming he did tell her - it doesn't say how LW found out!)

MyNameIsNot · July 24

No. Leave them alone.

Casadena · July 24

So, if these are super good friends of son and LW knows them (it's unclear if that's the case) I think it would be fine to say you'd love to be in the kids life if they were open to it. LW doesn't seem quite reasonable enough to be ok being the bonus adult in a kids life but It's not out of line to explore imo if people are open.

charlotte989875 · July 24

The couple has a child, your son does not. Sure, talk to him but be prepared for him to tell you no.

ETA: I think the more people who love your kids the better, the bigger your village the better off everyone is. But not everyone feels the same way and whatever the agreements are the donation are they need to be honored.

Talk to your son first

Re: Talk to your son first

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