Dear Prudence,
I just moved to a new city. My job is great, but I struggle to make new connections as a single, asexual woman. I thought I made a new friend in “Naomi.” She is in her mid-20s with a toddler and is in a very unhappy marriage. Naomi has been very vocal about her struggles when we talk at lunch, but has turned down or canceled on my attempts to socialize outside of work. I offered to pick up dinner, and we could take her child to the park or local splash pad, but Naomi never commits.
After not seeing her for a while, I asked how things were and if things were any better at home. Naomi said no, and I put a hand on her shoulder in comfort. Since then, Naomi has given me the cold shoulder and ignores any of my attempts at conversation. Last time, I asked if everything was OK, and Naomi said I made her uncomfortable when I touched her shoulder. I apologized and gave her space.
But now, after a few weeks have passed, Naomi has started joining me for lunch again and acts like nothing happened. Is it even worth bringing up, or should I just cut my losses? I felt that Naomi could really use a friend, but I don’t know if I am the right person.